ENTERING A PSEUDO RELATIONSHIP?!

more than friends less than lover?...though you know it yourself that the emotions are real, the fact that you are not in any way committed to each other makes it sound like a joke.

i let myself fall before i knew it hmm the questions is..

Should I keep this going and enjoy each moment and just think of the consequences later or put an end while the pain of letting go is still bearable and wait for the real one to come?

Hmmm guilt free sex without any attachment is nice and all but if you are falling for this person and they don't feel the same then it'll be best to cut your losses now while you still can. You may be able to save the friendship if you do it now. It's a terrible shame to let it go but the pain will be a lot greater if you just ignore the fact that it's definitly going to hurt like a bitch later. Talk it over with this person.

Trust me if you already introduced sex than returning to just a friendship will be awkward and might not work.

So I guess (since the way you worded it made it hard to understand) that you are falling for him but not mutual? If you want something more than you would need to decided if you want to presume it with him or elsewhere. So really you just need to talk to them about it and really decide how to precede from there.

So basically it turned into a friends with benefits sort of relationship, but you're feeling more then just friendly feelings for the person?

As others have said once feelings like this develop and the other person cannot reciprocate these feelings it is probably best to cut off the relationship entirely. Trying to go backwards and just be friends doesn't normally work. I had something similar happen with a old hook-up of mine where he confessed his feelings to me, but all I wanted at the time was something physical and no emotional attachment. I cut it off cold turky since I decided to move on completely and he needed to do the same.

Just talk to this person and see what they think and do what will make you feel the best. The outcome may suck, but you can't help your feelings.

Why not try too ask him/her if you could have a actual relationship with them so it isn't a joke? I bet sex feels good but in my opinion if your just sex buddies you're no more value then a condom. I think it would be better to end it if it's just going to be a sex based relationship so you don't deal with the pain later.

thanks for the advise guys..it really helps :)...in my situation, i don't know..i can't stop thinking about her :( i'm in love with her..though this kind of feeling is a little bit awkward but..ugh.. so confused this is the first time i fell in loved sorry...

thank you so much for the advise. it really help me a a lot :) GODBLESS ... haayss :(

I wouldn't equate this type of thing to the value of a condom, it's a bit offensive. People do hook-ups or friends with benefits for many reasons. May not seem logical to some, but for others it's something they feel they need. I know when I use to do it for a bit, it was because I was hurt so much and I never got to enjoy the physical aspects of a relationship. Once I got that period of my life out of the way, I was open to starting over fresh with guys.

The biggest thing is it can be done in a healthy enough way; safe sex practices, choosing a decent guy, and knowing what the consequences of such a relationship will be (emotional development, unplanned pregnancy, STDs, etc).

The guys I did things with I made sure to know before I did anything with, even the random hook-ups I knew a bit before screwing lol. I won't say that it's the right way or the healthy way to do things, but life doesn't come with a textbook and who is anyone to judge what is right and what is wrong? You help out people who need it and if it's there choice you can't force them to change.

I don't think anyone should feel ashamed of there pasts and if things happen along the way such as developing feelings for your sex-friend, you just have to learn and live through it. I let my sex-friend down as best I could and cut all ties with them. I wanted to give them a fresh start.

OP hopefully you and your friend figure things out together, but regardless of what the result keep the good and fun memories, then move on from there. Also make sure to be safe with whoever you're with now and in the future!

Just my opinion, then again i'm rather old fashioned and don't just see sex as a relief, I do see it as something more serious so I don't care if it is offensive. Having friends and having a friend you have sex with are different but whatever you get my gist.

If you don't condone this type of relationship that's fine, but it's a bit unnecessary to equate a person a person's worth to a piece of rubber solely on this one aspect of there life choices. Not everyone thinks of it as a "must wait till marriage" or "need to be in a relationship" sort of deal. I personally never wanted to wait till marriage, but that's just my outlook on it.

My first love who I thought I would be with for a long time broke my heart after our first time so it took me some time to figure out what I wanted from a man and a relationship. For me I wanted to understand how sex could be enjoyable since I never got that from him (he had the goods, but didn't pack a punch lol). Even if people told me what they thought was best for me, I am one I had to figure it out for myself. In the end I found that sex wasn't as big of a deal and that I wanted a friendship with someone who could give me good sex as a bonus. My current bf of 2+ years is my friend first and lover second so I don't mind going through what I did, got a great person in the end lol.

Sex is what the person wishes to make of it really. It can be lighthearted, serious, fun, painful, boring, intense, passionate, a chore, etc. People come to think of sex however they choose to and find there own sense of value through it.

Relationships with people come in all forms and everyone is different. I know I can't be friends with people I sleep with, but some people can do it just fine so whatever floats your boat is my thing. The only issue is when you are not happy with something you should find a way to change it and make things better, so if you are not happy with a relationship however it is, you should figure out what can make things better for yourself.

I'm definitively old fashioned in that regard, too, but I think you're over stating it in a mean way. Friends with benefits or random hock ups aren't just a relief, but also a kind of a support to understand yourself (and the other with himself/herself more). That granted, you can also archive that in more serious ways, but people sometimes doesn't want to hold SO much responsibilities, specially young ones. It is fun, it makes you feel good, and as long you or the other pal are considerate and both are actually able to keep seriousness outside (or both are serious) and using protection, it is all good. Sex at the end is also a valuable communication tool, and while some are ok by just writing, by just talking or by just hugging, some needs a bit more from time at time. Each people lives their sexuality in a different way and it's beautiful and awesome if the person is happy (and isn't making others unhappy).



I say the s-same~ Also, yeah, from my own words I think the best is that you talk with your friend about how you feel as it is important to leave everything clear in things like that. It will be for the best at the end.

Talk to them about it. See how they feel. If they don't feel the same then continuing the FWB relationship you have going may only cause you pain later on down the road.

you guys are awesome thank you guys... fuck hurts..i mean fact hurts :(

Same happened to a couple I know, the guy developed feelings but she never wanted anything more. He didnt know whether to leave before he got hurt even more or to wait and enjoy the little he got. He chose to stay and she started to like him a little. Basically, talk to her and see if there is any chance of things developing.

If you give up from your feelings it will be like you are going to give up from every "situation" and I guees that you really have to love until the person(you love) falls in love with you (or not), but ,of course, you can prevent this unusual DEAD END from telling to the person in the right hour your true feelings. You really have to do this and be SURE to do in the correct time or she or he would get the wrong feeling or consideration about you.
This happened with me and I just ignored the situation so that my feelings wouldn't be destroyed by something so worthless. Today I'm her best friend.
Oh yeah, be careful or you are going to be her butler Hahaha. (Reminds me of Ciel and Sebastian. Just kidding ^^").
Good Luck.

I guess it depends on how well you think you can cope with that type of relationship. Also, how jealous you get should probably be factored into it too.

If it's just a one time thing, I would go for it. If it's longer, it might be too complicated.