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fixing what I screwed up.. help please?
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So I need advice I was dating this girl An we loved each other more then anything we chose each other over anything. Well I had a brain hemorrhage an when I was in the hospital the doctors told me I'm not gonna be the same person for awhile an that I had to be careful because I could die. So after I finally got out the hospital she gave me her virginity.. I felt even worst about what I was preparing to do....I wanted to push her away before I die so she wouldn't be hurt well what I wanted to do was just be a little cold like example: she wants a hug I'd be like not right now even though I did.. well a month later I went over an her house caught on fire in the living room an I wasn't wearing shoes... I walked in saw the couch an diff stuff on fire I didn't want her house to burn so I ran picked up the couch an threw it outside it an some curtains I tore them off an threw them out I ran an got her an got her outside an she called the firemen down the road I had 3rd degree burns on my hands an feet An 2nd on my legs well I got out the hospital again an I went overboard I started being more of an ass then before , I would be a dick I would say mean things accuse her of stuff an just a bunch of stuff. 2 months later I told her it would be better if we didn't date so we wouldn't hate each other an she said she wanted to date again 1 day I told her we both had to date Atleast 1 person before then Well I ended up messing up.. we couldn't be friends because a month later me an her we're still making love an we had to quit because we were doing same stuff just without the title an I wanted her still so a friend of mine an I started dating an we both just wanted to be friends with benefits so we were. I found out at the hospital my brain wasn't swollen anymore an I told my friend I can't do it anymore, I was gonna ask out my ex but she had yet to date anyone. ... an she was mad that I did it with another girl... An then about 2 months ago she started dating someone a week ago they broke up because he wanted to be friends with benefits an she said no so they dated an he didn't get anything besides kisses so he broke up with her... my ex won't talk to me if say she is at my friends an I come over she won't say hi she ignores me an deleted me off of Facebook she moves when I sit next to her... I don't know what to do even if we don't date I want her to Atleast talk please advice please someone? I can't stand this... open to all ideas..
Note: i wrote this all on a phone please ignore the grammar my autocorrect is crap..
Note: i wrote this all on a phone please ignore the grammar my autocorrect is crap..
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Takerial
Lovable Teddy Bear
Your retarded actions ruined any chance you had. There is no fixing the crap you did. And I honestly find it hard to believe you actually care about this girl.
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Misaki_Chi
Fakku Nurse
First off if you know that you type this poorly then don't use your phone, this is a hell of a mess of continuous jumbled text making this very difficult to read.
Here is the thing about relationships, if you care about the person you are with you both talk to one another about problems and issues not push them away for "there happiness sake". That crap is only in the movies and never does any relationship good. By pushing her away and being a dick you hurt her and I can understand why she wouldn't want to be near you.
Also taking some time apart to see other people is a horrible thing to do. You don't just put a relationship on hold to do something else with other people, it end very poorly. It is a break up when you do this and no other form of wording will change this. Most parties will get upset with who there partner sleeps with because believe me that whole "oh they will never do it" is bullshit. If you feel like it gives you every justifiable reason to sleep with someone then you don't care about your partner enough to have even fathomed talking to them about all of this.
My advice from what I've read is this: you have to cherish and value your partner enough to talk to them about anything going on in your life as well as commit to making the relationship work. Even if you are afraid of hurting them or if you are afraid you are too weak to make this work, if they are the right person they will talk to you, stand by you and support you. A good partner can be your rock and your power; acting like a dick, pushing them away, and mentioning to see other people are just going to end the relationship that much sooner. It is pretty immature thinking and there is pretty much no chance of recovery after the fact.
You need to move on and let this girl live her life. Realize that you fucked up and if you have any ounce of love for her you will let her be happy doing her own thing in life. If you two are meant to be then let fate bring you two back together, but honestly it sounds like you need to grow up some. Let this relationship be a lesson to you and don't decide what is best all on your own.
Here is the thing about relationships, if you care about the person you are with you both talk to one another about problems and issues not push them away for "there happiness sake". That crap is only in the movies and never does any relationship good. By pushing her away and being a dick you hurt her and I can understand why she wouldn't want to be near you.
Also taking some time apart to see other people is a horrible thing to do. You don't just put a relationship on hold to do something else with other people, it end very poorly. It is a break up when you do this and no other form of wording will change this. Most parties will get upset with who there partner sleeps with because believe me that whole "oh they will never do it" is bullshit. If you feel like it gives you every justifiable reason to sleep with someone then you don't care about your partner enough to have even fathomed talking to them about all of this.
My advice from what I've read is this: you have to cherish and value your partner enough to talk to them about anything going on in your life as well as commit to making the relationship work. Even if you are afraid of hurting them or if you are afraid you are too weak to make this work, if they are the right person they will talk to you, stand by you and support you. A good partner can be your rock and your power; acting like a dick, pushing them away, and mentioning to see other people are just going to end the relationship that much sooner. It is pretty immature thinking and there is pretty much no chance of recovery after the fact.
You need to move on and let this girl live her life. Realize that you fucked up and if you have any ounce of love for her you will let her be happy doing her own thing in life. If you two are meant to be then let fate bring you two back together, but honestly it sounds like you need to grow up some. Let this relationship be a lesson to you and don't decide what is best all on your own.
