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How do I tell my crush I'm str8 w/out hurting her feelings?
1
My name is AnonFakkuLurker. So it all starts out when me and this dude are talking about anime/manga. Somehow Yaoi comes up and apparently he's a big enthusiast of it. I just try to shrug it off. I'm straight. I'm not anti-gay so I try to be chill about it and say that I have nothing against it. I think he took it the wrong way and he starts recommending stuff. I read like one chapter of it to calm him down.
Next morning, he's talking with my crush and he calls out to me, "Hey AnonFakkuLurker how was [sekaiichi]!?" My crush freaks out and hugs me. I'm ok with this. "I didn't know you read that!" I'm not okay with this. I attempted to casually explain that I just wasn't too into it, but to no avail. Apparently the manga I read the first chapter of [sekaiichi] was "hardcore" so she was like freaking out. I have big hands and she's caught me wearing cover-up, and she's said that I looked like some character from a Yaoi. I'm pretty sure she thinks I'm gay.
Shit.
Is that a good thing because she likes Yaoi or is it bad because she thinks I'm gay. She likes to poke my face and pat my hair, but idk if that even means anything.
Shit.
Did I just get Yaoi-zoned?
Please help. So confused.
Next morning, he's talking with my crush and he calls out to me, "Hey AnonFakkuLurker how was [sekaiichi]!?" My crush freaks out and hugs me. I'm ok with this. "I didn't know you read that!" I'm not okay with this. I attempted to casually explain that I just wasn't too into it, but to no avail. Apparently the manga I read the first chapter of [sekaiichi] was "hardcore" so she was like freaking out. I have big hands and she's caught me wearing cover-up, and she's said that I looked like some character from a Yaoi. I'm pretty sure she thinks I'm gay.
Shit.
Is that a good thing because she likes Yaoi or is it bad because she thinks I'm gay. She likes to poke my face and pat my hair, but idk if that even means anything.
Shit.
Did I just get Yaoi-zoned?
Please help. So confused.
1
Misaki_Chi
Fakku Nurse
I'd recommend just being clear about all of this to both of them. Tell them that you're not comfortable with them pushing the boys love on you. You don't mind a little here and there in conversations or if they are really passionate about it, but that they're going a bit overboard. No one should take this as an insult, because there's a different between being homophobic and getting annoyed with something being shoved in your face too much.
I feel the same way about yaoi and yuri myself. I'm a straight woman who has no problem with all forms of love, but I don't want people to push it onto me when I am not overly passionate about it or swing any other way but hetero. I use to have friends that were bi or homosexual tell me that I had to have some indication of feeling love for the same gender since I was cool with the stuff. Sure I went through a questioning phase, but it's moreso I was comfortable enough in my own sexual preferences and I had no problem with other's loving certain genders. Basically I don't see my preferences as something others have to follow because love is love. I just want people to be happy, doesn't mean that I have some deep seeded repressed homosexual urges. Easily realized that I like hotdogs over doughnuts holes or pecks over boobs lol.
tl;dr - just be honest with your friends when the time is right and they shouldn't have an issue with it. If they insist that you feel something you may not yet understand, just let it slide and be yourself. You can accept and even enjoy other types of love while having your own preferences personally.
Edit: could make a comment such as "I feel like you two think I'm gay sometimes" see what they say and say something like, "I'm happily straight but I appreciate other forms of love other people feel and see no problem with it". Talk about the top stuff first and if they still don't get it you can throw in the whole you are happily hetero and that this isn't something you want pushed on you.
I feel the same way about yaoi and yuri myself. I'm a straight woman who has no problem with all forms of love, but I don't want people to push it onto me when I am not overly passionate about it or swing any other way but hetero. I use to have friends that were bi or homosexual tell me that I had to have some indication of feeling love for the same gender since I was cool with the stuff. Sure I went through a questioning phase, but it's moreso I was comfortable enough in my own sexual preferences and I had no problem with other's loving certain genders. Basically I don't see my preferences as something others have to follow because love is love. I just want people to be happy, doesn't mean that I have some deep seeded repressed homosexual urges. Easily realized that I like hotdogs over doughnuts holes or pecks over boobs lol.
tl;dr - just be honest with your friends when the time is right and they shouldn't have an issue with it. If they insist that you feel something you may not yet understand, just let it slide and be yourself. You can accept and even enjoy other types of love while having your own preferences personally.
Edit: could make a comment such as "I feel like you two think I'm gay sometimes" see what they say and say something like, "I'm happily straight but I appreciate other forms of love other people feel and see no problem with it". Talk about the top stuff first and if they still don't get it you can throw in the whole you are happily hetero and that this isn't something you want pushed on you.
1
Talk to her and make yourself clear on how you're a straight man and NOT a gay dude. She'll listen if you say so seriously.
1
At doubt, just talk with her seriously and tell her the same story you tell us (well, you can avoid some details if you want, too). Not really a big problem, she'll most likely make some fun of you, just do the same with her! And... that is. Aside that take this with humor.
3
Thanks Fakku for the support.
So my crush no longer thinks I'm gay.
In fact, I've just worked up the balls (got mass peer pressured) to ask her out.
She said yes.
So my crush no longer thinks I'm gay.
In fact, I've just worked up the balls (got mass peer pressured) to ask her out.
She said yes.
0
Holoofyoistu
The Messenger
if she thinks your gay, saying your straight is not gonna change her oppion, so just tell her your straight, than wing it from there.
0
Explain to her what a Fudanshi is.
If that fails, ask her on a date. And make it clear that you are interested in her as a man.
If that fails, ask her on a date. And make it clear that you are interested in her as a man.
