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How Do You View Love?

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whatsittoya
10 years ago
In my whole life, I've read countless poems, quotations, anime and books, dedicated to love. I know it's a feeling that can't be quantified, but what's your take?

What is love for you?
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Misaki_Chi Fakku Nurse
10 years ago
I think for me personally love is something that means you can care for someone besides yourself; you can put them first before your own needs. Love isn't just about physical intimacy with another, it is about having someone that you can smile with, feel at home with, share things with, spend time with and not rip your hair out immediately lol.

Love can come in many forms from the love you have for a friend to the love you have for a pet or child or family member or your significant other. You can even love items and food (especially sweets.... I mean, it's so easy to fall in love with that succulent piece of Godiva chocolate cheese cake you got at the cheesecake facotry xD).

I know I am in love when I feel myself drawn to someone (again this doesn't have to be romantic). I feel like I can be myself to an extent and the biggest thing is I smile a lot or enjoy myself. I don't feel burdened by that person's presence or fear that I will hurt them/vise versa. I can give a piece of myself to them and want to make them happy even moreso then the average joe down the street (though I can give my kindness even to strangers since that's just me).

I guess if I had to sum up love I would say that it's a form of happiness. You may go through hard times with those you love and may feel like kicking them in the nuts when they piss you off, but you've also made good memories with them and you have had good times to cherish. You love that person because they are able to do something special for you even in the tiniest of ways.

That's love to me.
1
animefreak_usa Child of Samael
10 years ago
A false chemical reaction designed to keep primates together long enough to mate and keep care to offspring live.. 3 years max.
0
Joshnickle
10 years ago
Baby don't hurt me,
No more.
I have no idea honestly never had the feeling.
0
artcellrox The Grey Knight :y
10 years ago
I'm gonna chime in a little as well, despite my lack of experience in matters like these, because I do feel like I finally have an idea of what love really means.

Spoiler:
Misaki_Chi wrote...
I think for me personally love is something that means you can care for someone besides yourself; you can put them first before your own needs. Love isn't just about physical intimacy with another, it is about having someone that you can smile with, feel at home with, share things with, spend time with and not rip your hair out immediately lol.

Love can come in many forms from the love you have for a friend to the love you have for a pet or child or family member or your significant other. You can even love items and food (especially sweets.... I mean, it's so easy to fall in love with that succulent piece of Godiva chocolate cheese cake you got at the cheesecake facotry xD).

I know I am in love when I feel myself drawn to someone (again this doesn't have to be romantic). I feel like I can be myself to an extent and the biggest thing is I smile a lot or enjoy myself. I don't feel burdened by that person's presence or fear that I will hurt them/vise versa. I can give a piece of myself to them and want to make them happy even moreso then the average joe down the street (though I can give my kindness even to strangers since that's just me).

I guess if I had to sum up love I would say that it's a form of happiness. You may go through hard times with those you love and may feel like kicking them in the nuts when they piss you off, but you've also made good memories with them and you have had good times to cherish. You love that person because they are able to do something special for you even in the tiniest of ways.

That's love to me.


Misaki pretty much got it spot on in terms of what I believe love is as well, but there's one other aspect I'd say is important too, at least to me.

Acceptance. Acceptance of not just who you love, but of yourself too.

Spoiler:
I've had crushes before, and looking back at them now, I don't think that was love at all. Just infatuation with looks and maybe a little bit of personality. There was more attraction to the personality in the recent one too, but unfortunately I believe that stemmed from my own insecurity about being alone than actually genuinely wanting to be with someone because I love them.

Recently though, I feel like it's happening again, but it feels significantly different this time. I'm not pining or anything, rather I feel pretty fine. That's when I realized why. The person in question is my best friend who, yes I kinda do have a thing for now, but I do feel for her in the same way Misaki mentioned, but most importantly, I know who she is, and every little good and bad in her, yet I still love her all the same, and I will no matter what. She loves me back just as much and accepts me for who I am as well.

That's when I understood and finally confirmed what I believed about love in the first place: before you can ever love someone else, you must be able to love yourself. You need to be confident in who and what you are, and accept all that (and work to fixing any issues you believe you have) before you can ever say that you love someone else for the same reasons. Sure, some couples try to change the other person while in the relationship into someone who is no longer the person they fell for in the first place. That's bad. You can't just change someone else, you need to be there for them, support them and their decisions, and make them want to change themselves, and only for the better too. Which is why I don't really use the word change, I like the term mature or grow more.


Okay, I'm starting to ramble now. Sorry for that.
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y00han
10 years ago
love is forgiveness and acceptance;
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whatsittoya
10 years ago
artcellrox wrote...
I'm gonna chime in a little as well, despite my lack of experience in matters like these, because I do feel like I finally have an idea of what love really means.

Spoiler:
Misaki_Chi wrote...
I think for me personally love is something that means you can care for someone besides yourself; you can put them first before your own needs. Love isn't just about physical intimacy with another, it is about having someone that you can smile with, feel at home with, share things with, spend time with and not rip your hair out immediately lol.

Love can come in many forms from the love you have for a friend to the love you have for a pet or child or family member or your significant other. You can even love items and food (especially sweets.... I mean, it's so easy to fall in love with that succulent piece of Godiva chocolate cheese cake you got at the cheesecake facotry xD).

I know I am in love when I feel myself drawn to someone (again this doesn't have to be romantic). I feel like I can be myself to an extent and the biggest thing is I smile a lot or enjoy myself. I don't feel burdened by that person's presence or fear that I will hurt them/vise versa. I can give a piece of myself to them and want to make them happy even moreso then the average joe down the street (though I can give my kindness even to strangers since that's just me).

I guess if I had to sum up love I would say that it's a form of happiness. You may go through hard times with those you love and may feel like kicking them in the nuts when they piss you off, but you've also made good memories with them and you have had good times to cherish. You love that person because they are able to do something special for you even in the tiniest of ways.

That's love to me.


Misaki pretty much got it spot on in terms of what I believe love is as well, but there's one other aspect I'd say is important too, at least to me.

Acceptance. Acceptance of not just who you love, but of yourself too.

Spoiler:
I've had crushes before, and looking back at them now, I don't think that was love at all. Just infatuation with looks and maybe a little bit of personality. There was more attraction to the personality in the recent one too, but unfortunately I believe that stemmed from my own insecurity about being alone than actually genuinely wanting to be with someone because I love them.

Recently though, I feel like it's happening again, but it feels significantly different this time. I'm not pining or anything, rather I feel pretty fine. That's when I realized why. The person in question is my best friend who, yes I kinda do have a thing for now, but I do feel for her in the same way Misaki mentioned, but most importantly, I know who she is, and every little good and bad in her, yet I still love her all the same, and I will no matter what. She loves me back just as much and accepts me for who I am as well.

That's when I understood and finally confirmed what I believed about love in the first place: before you can ever love someone else, you must be able to love yourself. You need to be confident in who and what you are, and accept all that (and work to fixing any issues you believe you have) before you can ever say that you love someone else for the same reasons. Sure, some couples try to change the other person while in the relationship into someone who is no longer the person they fell for in the first place. That's bad. You can't just change someone else, you need to be there for them, support them and their decisions, and make them want to change themselves, and only for the better too. Which is why I don't really use the word change, I like the term mature or grow more.



Okay, I'm starting to ramble now. Sorry for that.


Ramble away good sir. You actually have good points.

It's kinda hard to think of love that way when fresh out of a relationship (especially if you've devoted a lot of time) Some of your points managed to hit some sore spots. I guess I still have lots of years ahead of me to learn about 'this'.
0
artcellrox The Grey Knight :y
10 years ago
whatsittoya wrote...
artcellrox wrote...
I'm gonna chime in a little as well, despite my lack of experience in matters like these, because I do feel like I finally have an idea of what love really means.

Spoiler:
Misaki_Chi wrote...
I think for me personally love is something that means you can care for someone besides yourself; you can put them first before your own needs. Love isn't just about physical intimacy with another, it is about having someone that you can smile with, feel at home with, share things with, spend time with and not rip your hair out immediately lol.

Love can come in many forms from the love you have for a friend to the love you have for a pet or child or family member or your significant other. You can even love items and food (especially sweets.... I mean, it's so easy to fall in love with that succulent piece of Godiva chocolate cheese cake you got at the cheesecake facotry xD).

I know I am in love when I feel myself drawn to someone (again this doesn't have to be romantic). I feel like I can be myself to an extent and the biggest thing is I smile a lot or enjoy myself. I don't feel burdened by that person's presence or fear that I will hurt them/vise versa. I can give a piece of myself to them and want to make them happy even moreso then the average joe down the street (though I can give my kindness even to strangers since that's just me).

I guess if I had to sum up love I would say that it's a form of happiness. You may go through hard times with those you love and may feel like kicking them in the nuts when they piss you off, but you've also made good memories with them and you have had good times to cherish. You love that person because they are able to do something special for you even in the tiniest of ways.

That's love to me.


Misaki pretty much got it spot on in terms of what I believe love is as well, but there's one other aspect I'd say is important too, at least to me.

Acceptance. Acceptance of not just who you love, but of yourself too.

Spoiler:
I've had crushes before, and looking back at them now, I don't think that was love at all. Just infatuation with looks and maybe a little bit of personality. There was more attraction to the personality in the recent one too, but unfortunately I believe that stemmed from my own insecurity about being alone than actually genuinely wanting to be with someone because I love them.

Recently though, I feel like it's happening again, but it feels significantly different this time. I'm not pining or anything, rather I feel pretty fine. That's when I realized why. The person in question is my best friend who, yes I kinda do have a thing for now, but I do feel for her in the same way Misaki mentioned, but most importantly, I know who she is, and every little good and bad in her, yet I still love her all the same, and I will no matter what. She loves me back just as much and accepts me for who I am as well.

That's when I understood and finally confirmed what I believed about love in the first place: before you can ever love someone else, you must be able to love yourself. You need to be confident in who and what you are, and accept all that (and work to fixing any issues you believe you have) before you can ever say that you love someone else for the same reasons. Sure, some couples try to change the other person while in the relationship into someone who is no longer the person they fell for in the first place. That's bad. You can't just change someone else, you need to be there for them, support them and their decisions, and make them want to change themselves, and only for the better too. Which is why I don't really use the word change, I like the term mature or grow more.



Okay, I'm starting to ramble now. Sorry for that.


Ramble away good sir. You actually have good points.

It's kinda hard to think of love that way when fresh out of a relationship (especially if you've devoted a lot of time) Some of your points managed to hit some sore spots. I guess I still have lots of years ahead of me to learn about 'this'.


Understandable. Like I said, I'm talking with no experience, so all my words are based on just my hopes right now. Maybe the hurt after a breakup would lead me to think different. However, thanks to the people around me and their influence and support, I like to believe I can stick firmly to those ideals.

Take your time if you're still healing, different people are affected and go by in different ways. Sorry about hitting the sore spots.
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김치
10 years ago
Love is what I do to my girlfriend.
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the_bloodwalker
10 years ago
short version: I view love as an opportunity (or adventure) that comes with its own risks and rewards.

Long version: love is some sort investment (sorry for the lack of a more appropriate word) of most, if not all of you into another person. What you get depends on what you give and what the other person gives back, which may bring uncertainty to a lot of people. There is happiness, sadness, pain, healing, the good, the bad, the ugly, etc. that come and go and it's our choice to keep going or move on.
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blinkgirl211
10 years ago
When I was younger I believed love was something you had a deep emotional bond with. Also something that you truly cared for and just couldn't be without.

As I got older I felt like people over use the word "love". I have had people I dated in the first 2 or 3 dates say they loved me, which basically a way to attempt to get into my pants. So to me I don't believe in love like I used to, or have a high hope I will find that first meaning....
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Princess Molestia
10 years ago
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tUYGzZ0tQpA

I want you to show me...
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luvyduv
10 years ago
one word, and yes it doesn't (the word itself) really exist...so don't get on me about that, buttttt...it's the only one i really define it with.

unconditionallity.

define it how you will. it's how i view love, true love.
0
Kaypi
10 years ago
I things stupid men say to get in the pants of gullible girls most of the time. Other is that you actually love the person or trying to trick them somehow.
0
DatYuriThough Goddess of Nature
10 years ago
To me love is showing your partner that you're truly loyal, ready to devote yourself body and soul to them and put them and their needs ahead of your own. To me it's also about reaching the pinnacle of how much you care about that person and every moment you get with them is precious.

Really mushy crap I know, but that's how I feel when I'm with my Gf.
0
King Dingaling
10 years ago
At one point i would attempt to define it, but now...

I honestly have no fucking clue.
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CaffeLatte~
10 years ago
King Dingaling wrote...
At one point i would attempt to define it, but now...

I honestly have no fucking clue.


So I wasn't alone. The more I think about love, the more I come to realize that I don't know.
0
whatsittoya
10 years ago
blinkgirl211 wrote...
When I was younger I believed love was something you had a deep emotional bond with. Also something that you truly cared for and just couldn't be without.

As I got older I felt like people over use the word "love". I have had people I dated in the first 2 or 3 dates say they loved me, which basically a way to attempt to get into my pants. So to me I don't believe in love like I used to, or have a high hope I will find that first meaning....


Yeah, I think you would really have to kiss a few frogs to find your prince. It's interesting to see this thread expand and take in more meanings from different people with different opinions, I do hope you find the kind of love that you're looking for.

CaffeLatte~ wrote...
King Dingaling wrote...
At one point i would attempt to define it, but now...

I honestly have no fucking clue.


So I wasn't alone. The more I think about love, the more I come to realize that I don't know.


I guess the thread exists for a reason, noh? Well, no one would truly know what love is, others have a better grasp of it than others and we all differ in our opinions and views. That's the beauty of the word love.
0
Longevity
10 years ago
When she gives you a blowjob and doesn't expect you to go down on her...that is love.
2
xhimitsu
10 years ago
I will warn and apologize for my frozen heart but:

Spoiler:
I think love depends on the person, how they use it(the word) and in what environment they grew up in. To be honest since I don't think I have ever been in love, love for me seems like something fictive which is made up by movies, books and other fiction. A kind of fantasy drug which seems to blind people, make them believe the most ridiculous and stop thinking independent. Of course I know this isn't the case /or so I want to believe/ but this is seriously the feeling I get from love these days. Something everyone want and chase because of all the classic romance and drama.

I do also connect love strongly to hormones and the scientific part. Something which is just chemical which happens in our brain. The entire 'heart beating faster, butterflies and all' not something I can really imagine though if it does happen they can all be explained scientifically too by hormones secreted from the brain. To 'fall in love' is said to last 3 month chemically after that.. is the love over or does the relationship start to build on other things than love like: mutual acceptance and understanding? Well that can definitely be discussed. Like I don't believe in love at first sight, I do believe in hormones from someone with qualities for survival will attract you. Make you curious, but is curiousity love?

I'm not trying to say I don't want to experience this fantasy called "to fall in love/Be in love" but I just question it a lot. Also with how the word is *as someone mentioned* overused and the hidden meanings which can lie behind the usage. Well it isn't rare to hear the phrase "I love you" from someone you don't even feel any attachment to. Some use it to get sex other use it as a stronger version of like and some just throw it randomly whenever.


TL;DR: Love for me just seems like a stronger word for like which you tell a person you care for/care the most for be it romantically or friendly. Maybe it isn't the "love" between a relationship which makes it work but actually the mutual understanding, acceptance, forgiveness and communication. Though the "love" just makes you want to take another step to get to know this "very liked/Most liked" person better. Though some might use "love" as a synonym of all those words mentioned before and if so then sure love is what makes a relationship work.
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