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My Girlfriend's punishment how long?
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I have a girlfriend who's very immature, a spoiled child and very selfish. She annoys me sometimes but anyways this is what happened. She ignored or took my love for granted for a month. I got really tired of it and I started to not send any messages to her and ignore her for a while until she keeps on saying sorry consecutively for days. Right now she wants me back even though I said I want this over. I'm planning on giving her one chance but I am still going to ignore her for most of the time since I got really tired of how much she took me for granted.
How long should I punish her? I also want her to be more mature so I also told her to read 'Good Ending' by Seo Kouji, if you've read that manga then you know how nice that story was and how it showed some real life situations like the relationships and such. I told her if she doesn't finish reading it in a week, writing a summary and learning from it then I'll disappear from her life forever. I learned a lot in that manga after all, that's why I know it would help.
How long should I punish her? I also want her to be more mature so I also told her to read 'Good Ending' by Seo Kouji, if you've read that manga then you know how nice that story was and how it showed some real life situations like the relationships and such. I told her if she doesn't finish reading it in a week, writing a summary and learning from it then I'll disappear from her life forever. I learned a lot in that manga after all, that's why I know it would help.
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Misaki_Chi
Fakku Nurse
Sorry to be rude, but how is what you're doing any more mature then what you'r girlfriend did to you?
Love isn't about punishing your partner for there faults, it's about learning how to communicate and working together to become better people overall.
What she did to you wasn't the most mature thing that I can agree, but to have her win your love back is ridiculous. To even suggest having her write a paper to learn a lesson is even worse. Treat your partner with more respect then this, they are not a child. You are not perfect my good man (no one ever is) and there are probably things that she get's pissed of with as well.
If you want to give the relationship another chance then do so and let the past go. All you really need to say to clear this mess up is that you want better communication between the two of you and say what it is you love about your relationship together.
If she makes the same mistakes try to talk it out and if that doesn't work then end it. When you do address issues such as this you just have to be honest and make it about how you feel, not about the person.
When I get upset over my boyfriend being social I am very open about it and at first he thought I was mad at him, but really I was just insecure because I'm not a social butterfly. I felt a bit jealous of his ability to have fun and make it look so easy and felt like I wasn't important. He understood where I was coming from to a degree and felt it was weird I didn't want to be around people. In the end though we did a little talking and we've grown as result. I am more social and he has become a better home body. We still work on our differences, but again we talk about it not punish the other person for the things we dislike.
Love isn't about punishing your partner for there faults, it's about learning how to communicate and working together to become better people overall.
What she did to you wasn't the most mature thing that I can agree, but to have her win your love back is ridiculous. To even suggest having her write a paper to learn a lesson is even worse. Treat your partner with more respect then this, they are not a child. You are not perfect my good man (no one ever is) and there are probably things that she get's pissed of with as well.
If you want to give the relationship another chance then do so and let the past go. All you really need to say to clear this mess up is that you want better communication between the two of you and say what it is you love about your relationship together.
If she makes the same mistakes try to talk it out and if that doesn't work then end it. When you do address issues such as this you just have to be honest and make it about how you feel, not about the person.
When I get upset over my boyfriend being social I am very open about it and at first he thought I was mad at him, but really I was just insecure because I'm not a social butterfly. I felt a bit jealous of his ability to have fun and make it look so easy and felt like I wasn't important. He understood where I was coming from to a degree and felt it was weird I didn't want to be around people. In the end though we did a little talking and we've grown as result. I am more social and he has become a better home body. We still work on our differences, but again we talk about it not punish the other person for the things we dislike.
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I did actually voice out my feelings. She did also listen to me and she is making effort to well mend things. It does seem very bad of me to even make her win back my love. Though she doesn't need to I do still love her. I just wanted to punish her for a bit because well, I just got so angry, it's like the efforts I did meant nothing to her. I mean I didn't want her to feel insecure, I greeted her everyday, I did the small things and the big things that would make her happy. Yet there's no reciprocation that just I got so tired of it. You're right it is very immature of me to punish her for something like that.
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Misaki_Chi
Fakku Nurse
The anger and feelings are very justified and it's great you talked with her about things. Just remember that no matter how you view your partner as long as you care for them and they are willing to work it out with you, then it's worth the work.
You had every reason to end things with her when you did because when all you do is try and the other person cannot acknowledge it, then there is no communication which means no room for growth.
As I said, just never punish your partner. Let your feelings be heard and let your anger dissipate before hand. I know when I get too angry I will tell my boyfriend I need a break to vent so I can talk rationally to him afterwards (I will admit I can be a spoiled immature brat with my man, but he still accepts that part of me and we work on it together).
Just give your girlfriend some slack (we're human) and hopefully you two can work things out together and be better in the end.
I would also say it's okay to tone down your part in the affectionate department. Love is like a tango, you do a little giving and taking to make the routine work. If you take too much of the lead it is all give and no room to take. In essence it is a way for her to win back your love, but in reality you just need more from her and this is a way for her to prove it. You'll eventually find a balance through it all.
You had every reason to end things with her when you did because when all you do is try and the other person cannot acknowledge it, then there is no communication which means no room for growth.
As I said, just never punish your partner. Let your feelings be heard and let your anger dissipate before hand. I know when I get too angry I will tell my boyfriend I need a break to vent so I can talk rationally to him afterwards (I will admit I can be a spoiled immature brat with my man, but he still accepts that part of me and we work on it together).
Just give your girlfriend some slack (we're human) and hopefully you two can work things out together and be better in the end.
I would also say it's okay to tone down your part in the affectionate department. Love is like a tango, you do a little giving and taking to make the routine work. If you take too much of the lead it is all give and no room to take. In essence it is a way for her to win back your love, but in reality you just need more from her and this is a way for her to prove it. You'll eventually find a balance through it all.
