Question to Men:

If your girlfriend / wife cheated with another woman, but told you the truth and apologized (while implying she had no feelings for said woman), would you feel any different than if she cheated with another man? If so, why? I'm not sure if this question has been asked before, but I remember reading this exact same question in some forum (not sure if it was Fakku or not). I forgot the results of the question, so I thought I would ask myself. I personally think it is different than if she would cheat with another man. Don't ask me why, because even I don't know. Cheating is cheating, but there is something different when it comes women having sex with other women that makes it not so bad...What ever happened to gender equality?... Bonus question to women: If your boyfriend had cheated on you with another man, but told you the truth and apologized, would it be any different than if he cheated on you with a woman? Why or why not?

As someone who is mildly bi (leaning towards hetero), cheating is cheating to me. My reaction and wither or not I would consider dumping them would depend on the current relationship, since not all relationships are created equal.

(I'm lesbian). To be honest I've been felt more hurt when the girl cheats me with a guy than with a girl, or broke with me in favor of a guy than a girl. This is because of two things: - A lot of girls tells you that they only like girls or they prefer them by a huge gap that they ignore guys anyway. So when they cheat you with a guy is like... it hurts more as it is another lie. Bisexual girls do that often to nullify any possible jealousy with guys from your part, but it is a dirty strategy to lie, >_>. Sometimes I know it is because confusion and not a lie, too, but then I feel really sad because they didn't shared their doubts or confusion with me, lack of confidence... (This part does not apply if the girl already told me she was bisexual. In the case of confusion, if the girl talked me about her confusion or her sexuality a bit at least, this does not apply, neither). - Most bisexual girls really really really loves so much "that" thing that it is annoying. I feel envy of the guy because I don't have [i]that[/i] thing, so what can I do is sightly more limited... If they cheat you in the first place that may because they didn't felt satisfied enough, too, so yeah... (If I feel she felt really happy during love... aww, <3, anyway, this does not apply. If I was in a relationship that was low on lewd and was more focused on other things, this does not apply neither. This is because I know if they cheated me that would be more because romantic reasons and that is, well, not genderless yet, but you have all types of guys and girls anyway, so it is fine). That would be for me. Note: Not really more hurt or annoyed, but it does make me feel really uneasy to think about heterosexual intercourse on average and getting cheated with a guy unavoidable makes me think about that, >//>U. Oh, yes, getting cheated for me means automatic leaving the girl. Cheating needs lies, lies that are often serious, and though I forgive those thinks really quickly, I know for sure things wouldn't work, though, so I prefer friendship or making distance if that isn't possible. I don't call cheating some flirting here and there, and that she does have relations with others is fine during the firsts months as long there aren't lies (thus not cheating), though I request being the most important, and if I don't feel like that I quit, too.

Cheating in my book: going behind your partner's back to do something with someone that you could and should be doing with your partner instead, knowing that your partner wouldn't have approved of the hidden actions. I'm slightly more lenient and unorthodox when it comes to relationships, in the sense that I'd always want to talk about where the boundaries lie and don't lie, especially with regards to extramarital affairs. I'd certainly be interested in trying an open relationship with someone, but rules would still exist. Going against those rules, regardless of who you're doing it with, is cheating. For example, here's a relationship scenario I talked about with a friend of mine. We'd both be allowed to have sex with others of the same sex openly, after getting everyone's consent of course. I'd go for guys, she'd go for girls, we tell each other about when such a thing would go down, and maybe even join in the others' fun for a little watching and what not. If, however, I began to get sexual [b]and[/b] emotional (this is important) with someone my partner doesn't approve of, that would be considered cheating on the grounds of that relationship's rules. tl;dr talk it out with your partner at first, make rules, cheating happens when you break those rules in any way, so no, I don't really believe gender of the outside party actually matters.

[quote="artcellrox"]Cheating in my book: going behind your partner's back to do something with someone that you could and should be doing with your partner instead, knowing that your partner wouldn't have approved of the hidden actions. I'm slightly more lenient and unorthodox when it comes to relationships, in the sense that I'd always want to talk about where the boundaries lie and don't lie, especially with regards to extramarital affairs. I'd certainly be interested in trying an open relationship with someone, but rules would still exist. Going against those rules, regardless of who you're doing it with, is cheating. For example, here's a relationship scenario I talked about with a friend of mine. We'd both be allowed to have sex with others of the same sex openly, after getting everyone's consent of course. I'd go for guys, she'd go for girls, we tell each other about when such a thing would go down, and maybe even join in the others' fun for a little watching and what not. If, however, I began to get sexual [b]and[/b] emotional (this is important) with someone my partner doesn't approve of, that would be considered cheating on the grounds of that relationship's rules. tl;dr talk it out with your partner at first, make rules, cheating happens when you break those rules in any way, so no, I don't really believe gender of the outside party actually matters.[/quote] This is pretty much exactly what I ment by "My reaction and wither or not I would consider dumping them would depend on the current relationship, since not all relationships are created equal."

I don't care if it's a man or a woman if my partner cheats then I'm done. It'd weird me out a bit if he sleeps with another man since he's as straight as they come, but I won't think any less of him for being with someone of the same sex. I'll just be pissed he's having personal relations with anyone but me. Anyone would feel betrayed and hurt by there partner seeking the comfort of others regardless if it was intentional or not. How they feel about it being with certain genders, people or the intention (physical versus emotional) is all up the the person. I know I wouldn't give a guy two seconds of my time after he cheats but for some it's something they feel they can work out. It also becomes more complicated for long terms partners or those with children/financial ties.

If a girl cheats on me I would probably break up with her after I cheat on her with her sister or someone close to her. I know its messed up but they would definitely be less likely to cheat on other guys after they cheat on me.

She free to fuck anyone she wants, just let me know. I have the same rules also. Hard to be bi and committed relationship. I get to watch anyways.

*Lesbian by the way* Trust is trust. If I'm in an exclusive relationship (I always make sure that my partner knows that) and they cheat on me, regardless of gender, I'm done with them. It's betrayal pure and simple. The gender of who they're with doesn't matter at all to me. When I'm with someone I expect them to commit to me, I don't expect some perfect girl to wait on me hand and foot, but I want someone who understands that if they experiment with either gender outside of our relationship whilst we're dating then it's over.

Cheating is cheating, no need to go into specifics. Never had a girlfriend cheat on me before (either that or I never found out) though if it did happen, I'd break up with her immediately and try to forget that she even existed in the first place.

(bi slightly leaning straight) cheating i would not like at all. it'd be a different story if my boyfriend and I had talked it out and agreed to let him poke a second girl(or guy. though he's -mostly- straight), but if he never consulted me and then did it and hid it from me i'd be upset. if he apologized and told me he didn't have any emotional ties and it was the last time he would do it (regardless of who he cheated with), i'd forgive him. now for my boyfriend, from the best of my ability to remember what he said to me was that if i were to sleep with someone else, he would be upset if i didn't consult him and get his agreement. he would be okay if i did ask him about it. (actually, i feel like i already had strike no. 1 since i webcamed with some random guy -.-. he was pretty upset that the guy had the nerve to convince me to do that stuff on camera, though he told me he wasn't mad at me.)

Oddly enough i gotta admit, to me it might feel worse if my gf/wife cheated with a other guy than if she cheated with another girl. Don't know why, maybe i might assume that if she cheated with the girl, it would be more straight up just for the pleasure of sex, but with a guy, i would be more offended because i would get the feeling of she seeing something in that other guy that's better than what i have to offer. It would feel more personal, even though cheating is cheating, but still. Without getting too hooked up on context, like was she drunk or whatever at the time, generally i probably would be just more personally offended if she was with another guy instead of a girl. She cheating with a girl i think i might even get over, but with a guy would be a definite no, because when a guy is involved, i would feel that what ever he can offer so can i (obviously not 100% true, but you get the idea), so in terms of getting pleasure from sex i would feel that it wasn't all for just for the sex, but there was something more deep involved. But if a girl was involved, all i can do is agree that i cannot give to her that experience what it is like to be sexually involved with the same sex, it wouldn't feel as personal to me like it would with the guy. I am not saying i would be happy about it, and it could be that our relationship would be over afterwards, but it simply wouldn't feel as bad to me as if she did with a guy.

But if she never cheated but told me of her bisexual proclivities ahead of time, well then... sure. As long as she shares the girl with me.

Considering she's bi and I find the whole "woman on woman" thing quite hot, I'd be happy for her to get with another woman; as long as she asks me first and I get in on the action too, because girl-on-girl without penetration is too much of a dicktease. Otherwise it's just going behind my back. It sounds hypocritical to like the idea but be pissed at her if she doesn't ask me first, but it's more about trust than anything.

[quote="Kope"]If your girlfriend / wife cheated with another woman, but told you the truth and apologized (while implying she had no feelings for said woman), would you feel any different than if she cheated with another man? If so, why? [/quote] Well I understand how you feel about it not feeling as bad but cheating is cheating. Doesn't matter if it's with another woman. If I catch you betraying me it's a wrap. I don't fantasize about having a three way if I catch my woman laying in bed with another woman. If I excuse it once it can happen again. She will suffer the consequences of her actions and I'll make sure she suffers as much as I have when I caught her. I may forgive her but it depends on my mood during the time it happens.

[quote="Gravity cat"]Considering she's bi and I find the whole "woman on woman" thing quite hot, I'd be happy for her to get with another woman; as long as she asks me first and I get in on the action too, because girl-on-girl without penetration is too much of a dicktease. Otherwise it's just going behind my back. It sounds hypocritical to like the idea but be pissed at her if she doesn't ask me first, but it's more about trust than anything.[/quote] well actually you'd have to consult with both your girlfriend and your girlfriend's girlfriend. because now you have to get two votes of consent. and if one of them doesn't consent, then you're just barging in on them and being rapey. and that'll probably get you cut out from ever having that experience.

Invite me next time and then we'll talk.

Yes dear, you can have that relationship with her...as long as I get to fuck her too. Would that be a problem?

[quote="retfir"][quote="Gravity cat"]Considering she's bi and I find the whole "woman on woman" thing quite hot, I'd be happy for her to get with another woman; as long as she asks me first and I get in on the action too, because girl-on-girl without penetration is too much of a dicktease. Otherwise it's just going behind my back. It sounds hypocritical to like the idea but be pissed at her if she doesn't ask me first, but it's more about trust than anything.[/quote] well actually you'd have to consult with both your girlfriend and your girlfriend's girlfriend. because now you have to get two votes of consent. and if one of them doesn't consent, then you're just barging in on them and being rapey. and that'll probably get you cut out from ever having that experience.[/quote] She doesn't have a girlfriend, wouldn't be with her if she did. Not usually keen on sharing so this is more hypothetically speaking above all else. If the third party didn't like it then we'd have major problems.

its never happened, so i cant really give a acurate view, but i feel like i would take it better than if she slept with a man, cause im super into yuri, dont know for sure tho