mdarkanima Posts
AssasinZAssasin
Not Hentai Protagonist
high_time wrote...
AssasinZAssasin wrote...
Damn, well i wouldn't mind playing a part in releasing a Visual Novel either, Eroge's and such. I had planned to do VN adaptations of some stories i have in mind. Or have already written haha XD. Well, if you need my input anytime feel free to find me on this site or any other site. Thanks for the encouragement till now, i appreciate it much.I also wanted to make many many doujins from my fiction i wrote, but i can't draw to save my life X.x. I love Visual Novels for one, so i can also be some sort of playtester/advisor in future if i so feel like it haha.
Ok then I'll be looking forward to your assistance if the circumstances meet up that is if I had something to offer and you have some free time to spare~
Strange...The total word count when i posted it WAS 1500, but i checked with an online tool and it's...Overly many words...Mind helping me check as well? i need confirmation X.x High_time, seriously i tried multiple different counting tools...
Ms Word: 1500
Wordcounttool: 1570
Java counter or something: 1420???????
WHA...? I think it has something to do with them counting spaces or something but i'm not sure...It's 5 days before deadline and i'm seriously unsure...
AssasinZAssasin
Not Hentai Protagonist
Um, i was just wondering but...Did my story violate any rules? because i posted it and linked it few days ago but my name is not in the list of participants...
AssasinZAssasin
Not Hentai Protagonist
I mean, it's definitely better with good art, but in cases such as a Vanilla manga/doujin, it's definitely the story which makes me love it all the more! The art could be subpar in that case, but the story would make up for it. I'm more of a...story-driven man.
AssasinZAssasin
Not Hentai Protagonist
high_time wrote...
AssasinZAssasin wrote...
Really? i appreciate it =). I need all this practice with competitions and the like because i'm looking to make a living off writing in the future. I'm nowhere near the level of best-sellers, but i intend to go that far in future. And yeah, about cliche's i understand. When i first started, i was afraid of criticism, but now i understand that criticism is also meant to help me. But there are no word limits in real books so i might not have as much trouble XD. Strong criticism? if i could get a comment from someone THAT CRITICAL and HARD TO PLEASE, it means i at least attracted their attention, which is a + for me. Thanks for the encouragement! i look forward to seeing both of our future works as well~By the way, did you remember my past story, The Greatest Gift? i revamped it and submitted it to an international magazine competition. I probably wont win but i tried entering =).
Yeah I remember that you want to write a novel sometime in the future. That's a great attitude to have and I'm sure you'll be a big name in the future, I myself would probably go towards a different directions since I plan to wrote for Doujins, Visual Novels, or something like that~
Well what's important is you tried to submit things that you worked your best of, at least you'll have a great experience while doing so~
Damn, well i wouldn't mind playing a part in releasing a Visual Novel either, Eroge's and such. I had planned to do VN adaptations of some stories i have in mind. Or have already written haha XD. Well, if you need my input anytime feel free to find me on this site or any other site. Thanks for the encouragement till now, i appreciate it much.
I also wanted to make many many doujins from my fiction i wrote, but i can't draw to save my life X.x. I love Visual Novels for one, so i can also be some sort of playtester/advisor in future if i so feel like it haha.
AssasinZAssasin
Not Hentai Protagonist
high_time wrote...
AssasinZAssasin wrote...
Haha wow that's a long comment, but i really appreciate it. But yeah, major trimming is right, it originally went on to about...2000 words + or something. Here's a phrase i believe in about writing -> "there is a reason writers use cliche's...They work, and people enjoy them". And of course, trimming is horrible. I could have made is 100X better i believe, if only the world limit wasn't there! I wanted to definitely improve that last part especially, it was hastily done with what word count i had left, character development wise...I think Wil had enough of a backstory but Sora didn't. But true, i tend to write more relaxed ones as opposed to ultra dramatised ones(not to say i don't write any but...). IF ONLY NO WORD LIMIT, is what i cursed the whole time i was writing this. I don't know what to do though, High, because i can't trim the starting any more than i already have to put extra "oomph" into the last part...Still, thanks for the criticism! I appreciate it, good luck with yours too~
The word limit also affects me a lot since I got tons of interesting ideas but failed to deliver them given it will take lots of words that will most likely surpass the limit even if it gets trimmed down to the max~
Ah I see. One caution to take note of, cliches only work if the author manage to execute them well enough. If the story premise itself weren't that good the story might still fall apart. Using too much cliche also results in a loss of sense of enjoyment towards more critical and thoughtful readers, be prepared for some strong criticisms from them because they're really difficult to please. That's based on the perspectives that the reader wants something different each time~
But I believe you're the kind that could muster them with utmost balance so I gave another thumbs up for that~
Really? i appreciate it =). I need all this practice with competitions and the like because i'm looking to make a living off writing in the future. I'm nowhere near the level of best-sellers, but i intend to go that far in future. And yeah, about cliche's i understand. When i first started, i was afraid of criticism, but now i understand that criticism is also meant to help me. But there are no word limits in real books so i might not have as much trouble XD. Strong criticism? if i could get a comment from someone THAT CRITICAL and HARD TO PLEASE, it means i at least attracted their attention, which is a + for me. Thanks for the encouragement! i look forward to seeing both of our future works as well~
By the way, did you remember my past story, The Greatest Gift? i revamped it and submitted it to an international magazine competition. I probably wont win but i tried entering =).
AssasinZAssasin
Not Hentai Protagonist
high_time wrote...
Hmm...how should I put it, the story is quite easy for the readers to catch on too and I could understand the plot for the start to finish, so kudos for you for making a well-placed scenario like this~At some parts it feels a bit cliche' like an usual anime stereotype but it doesn't really affect my judgment. I don't know if it's just me but it looks like the story's being through some major trimming, if it could be extended and developed from the hastily described part I'm sure it will turn out to be a powerful piece~
So yeah I take it you're trying to muster a balanced plot with character development, overall the story turns out quite nicely to me. But if there's one thing to improve it's probably about the character development, since even though the characters are pretty decent itself, I can't really feel strong emotions in it. Putting it simply you might want to make their feelings a bit more...realistic. If you can do that perfectly I think there's quite a large chance for you to win one of the prizes~
Up to the story itself yeah from the start to finish I could see where it is going, though I haven't seen much Cat/Dog girl-themed stories lately. The most memorable one is Wanko to Kurasou, so more or less the story reminded me on that one except the heroine starts in animal form instead of humanoid one. About that sudden transformation I believe that I've seen couple of those so it's not an entirely new idea for me, sort of expected it but still nice. There's not much twist going on but in my opinion this story has more of potential to be a relaxed romance thing with minimal amount of twists and turns rather than some dramatic one.
Since the character motives and actions are clear enough all you have to do is probably try to intensify it a bit and you're all done! Anyway nice job, I'm sure you'll do well on this event~
Haha wow that's a long comment, but i really appreciate it. But yeah, major trimming is right, it originally went on to about...2000 words + or something. Here's a phrase i believe in about writing -> "there is a reason writers use cliche's...They work, and people enjoy them". And of course, trimming is horrible. I could have made is 100X better i believe, if only the world limit wasn't there! I wanted to definitely improve that last part especially, it was hastily done with what word count i had left, character development wise...I think Wil had enough of a backstory but Sora didn't. But true, i tend to write more relaxed ones as opposed to ultra dramatised ones(not to say i don't write any but...). IF ONLY NO WORD LIMIT, is what i cursed the whole time i was writing this. I don't know what to do though, High, because i can't trim the starting any more than i already have to put extra "oomph" into the last part...
Still, thanks for the criticism! I appreciate it, good luck with yours too~
AssasinZAssasin
Not Hentai Protagonist
I'm finally done after much procrastination, but i don't think it's very good...Oh well! Looking forward to some constructive criticism XD. Good luck to everybody participating~
Where We Are Least Alone
Where We Are Least Alone
AssasinZAssasin
Not Hentai Protagonist
The full title is actually "In Solitude, Where We Are Least Alone", Which is a Blatant Shout out to "Yosuga No Sora". Even the character name for the girl is Sora...Just saying.XD
Anyways, about the story, I feel it's sort of uninspired and i have mixed feelings of even posting it! I got a little too into the start and ended up rushing the end to actually fit 1,500 words(which is how many words i have). I don't think it's very good, but i would like to hear some Constructive comments plz =).
Anyways, about the story, I feel it's sort of uninspired and i have mixed feelings of even posting it! I got a little too into the start and ended up rushing the end to actually fit 1,500 words(which is how many words i have). I don't think it's very good, but i would like to hear some Constructive comments plz =).
Spoiler:
AssasinZAssasin
Not Hentai Protagonist
high_time wrote...
AssasinZAssasin wrote...
High! it's nice to see you participating once again.Your work is always enjoyable to read, i must admit...
i like this quote right here -> "The most important thing might be lost forever as I drowned myself in this sea of desires. And as I wrote this piece I remembered the things that were most important.."
Haha. Great Entry! i can't picture myself competing against you at all X.x, what with my uninspired piece of writing...
Anyhow, good luck with this contest! It's great to see you competing once more =).
Thank you very much, I'm glad that you enjoy it. To tell ya the truth I don't really have much confidence in it and your comment makes me smile, really it's a nice boost for me~
Awww don't say that, I believe you could definitely make out something great with your abilities, I'll be waiting for your entry too so please do your best until then =D
Yeah, well hopefully i can get it out today if Microsoft word stops crashing on me... It's uninspired really, just a collection of notes. And um, the word limit always limits what i can do about my story. I'm just adding finishing touches right now to my "REALLY CUT DOWN" version. It's going to fall flat i think, i have no confidence unlike the last contest where i was inspired to write it.
Still though, i think yours is great, should have no problem getting really far XD.
Spoiler:
AssasinZAssasin
Not Hentai Protagonist
High! it's nice to see you participating once again.
Your work is always enjoyable to read, i must admit...
i like this quote right here -> "The most important thing might be lost forever as I drowned myself in this sea of desires. And as I wrote this piece I remembered the things that were most important.."
Haha. Great Entry! i can't picture myself competing against you at all X.x, what with my uninspired piece of writing...
Anyhow, good luck with this contest! It's great to see you competing once more =).
Your work is always enjoyable to read, i must admit...
i like this quote right here -> "The most important thing might be lost forever as I drowned myself in this sea of desires. And as I wrote this piece I remembered the things that were most important.."
Haha. Great Entry! i can't picture myself competing against you at all X.x, what with my uninspired piece of writing...
Anyhow, good luck with this contest! It's great to see you competing once more =).
AssasinZAssasin
Not Hentai Protagonist
Yeah...Damn i really need to get started on it...I'm just so busy lately i cant get down to write some stuff! Hopefully i can get it out before this week is over...
AssasinZAssasin
Not Hentai Protagonist
Awesome...OH well, wish i could go to the expo but i'm too busy to go...Curses. Good luck Jake!
AssasinZAssasin
Not Hentai Protagonist
Damn it, i just wish i wasn't such a poor bum...
AssasinZAssasin
Not Hentai Protagonist
Lols, no real interest in olympic sports, not unless it's a setting in Hentai XD.
AssasinZAssasin
Not Hentai Protagonist
I live so far away in a totally different country...Damn wish i could go, sounds like it would have been a fun time!
AssasinZAssasin
Not Hentai Protagonist
Haha...Me, i feel pretty damn sad now...Bad experiences with online dating can really scar you you know?
AssasinZAssasin
Not Hentai Protagonist
OH man...My computer is already full of animes though...
AssasinZAssasin
Not Hentai Protagonist
Awesome job! others were awesome as well and personally i couldn't decide a clear cut winner for me >.