What's Your Favorite Euphemism/Dysphemism For Sex?

Easy:

Lie back and think of England.

Release the kraken!

I bought you <3.

Takin' it to pound town.
No pants dance.
Hide the sausage.
Poking.

Hanky panky is one I always liked

I had no idea that was a thing. An old girlfriend of mine used to "make bacon" at one of her best friend's houses all the time.

I can deal with this.

Your girlfriend was cheating on you with a fuck buddy of hers. Bad times, man

I'm not surprised in the slightest. At least I didn't catch anything.

Poundtown. As in, "going down to poundtown", "taking her to poundtown". I also like to extend the location metaphor by using terms like "blowjob junction" and "titfuck turnpike", amongst others.

Kentucky Fried Choke-a-Bitch?

Fucking.
Making love.
Having sex.
-other terribly unoriginal euphemisms-
Although ever since my boyfriend got Skyrim (his early Christmas present from me), I've taken to initiating sexytimes with me saying "manflesh". His penis knows when the mistress calls.

EDIT: I guess sexytimes counts as one, doesn't it. That's probably my favorite. Simple and to the point, and kinda cute.

Happy hour.

...although that term is currently reserved for masturbation.

My day has been made.

Glad to be of service. :)