Human beings are such confusing creatures

So whats the deal with strangers asking me if I have a lighter? This seems to happen pretty often. If you are a smoker wouldn't you take a lighter along with your cigarettes? Asking random strangers for a lighter seems like the worst idea to solve the situation. If you didn't bring your cigarettes and so didn't bring your lighter but then you get a cigarette from a guy later why not just ask the guy you got it from for a lighter? Heaven help us all if even that guy doesn't have a lighter.

and yes IB is my personal blog

If someone wants to talk why not just say that? Say "I want to talk to you" and random strangers don't even know if I am a smoker (I'm not) so the whole sharing a light thing doesn't make much sense

Maybe their lighters broke or ran out of gas ?
It happened to me a few times.
And if there is no store nearby where I can buy one, even a cheap disposable to get by until I get home, I'll sure go and ask someone for a light. Though I make sure to ask someone who has a lit cig in his/her mouth.
Don't want to aks someone only so that person can say (s)hes not smoking.

ur face is confusing

After actually ready it: Wow. Somebody just asked you a question.

Say that in an even tone while staring in their eyes and smiling, and you multiplied the creepy value of that sencente. lol

Yeah, that question has boggled me for the past couple months. You'd think smokers would always keep one with them.

They probably just had a bad day, and they just want a cigarette to dull the edges of their troubles, and they look to you, an obviously kind looking person who could help them in their one time of need, which will blossom into a beautiful friendship that will last forever, and he'll be there will you through the good and the bad, going on adventures, sharing your darkest secrets, facing all the hardships life throws at you, until one of you lies on your deathbed, the other holding onto your hand for dear life, hearing your last words, feeling their last breaths, and in the last moments while they can still hear your soft voice, you confesses your unending devotion to one another as his hand goes limp in your embrace.......



...that or he's gonna mug you.

In fact, I'm pretty sure he was gonna mug you.

Forget what I said earlier.

Be glad someone physical is talking to you without asking for a half and half for a tener.

If your really bothered by it, just say "Ill trade you my lighter for a box of matches"

Exact same reason when you go to school and some of your mates comes and borrows your pen.

It all started with one guy losing his, and then the borrowing chain has been going on ever since.

Think of it like some weird version of musical chairs. There will always be one lighter less than the number of smokers.

I always have three on me. My good one, and two cheapos for the ritual borrowing.

Maybe you look like a smoker

People ask me that all the time, I guess I look like a smoker.

Wait this is people asking you for the lighter itself and not just a light? Why the fuck would you give anyone free stuff? Call him a dirty communist and to buy his own. Or you could be a little bitch and stutter out, "S-sorry, I f-forgot mine at home". Or you can take the middle ground and ask, "How much?"

Ive been playing too much Fallout, I just envisioned this scenario in the game.

Play this as you read the following:


"How much?" you ask as you gaze sternly in the eyes of the poor, lost soul in front of you.

He looks back, his eyes widening a little, an obvious sign of weakness, and replies, "How much what?"

You let out a small sigh, not too big, of course, lest you become one of them. You answer, "You think I'm a charity or something? At least treat me like a vending machine. How much you gonna pay for it?"

You see the shock and disbelief in his poor, weak, deluded eyes, and you brace yourself for what will come next, "Da hell u mean 'pay', bitchass nigga? I swear u honkyass lil crackityass nigga you better giv me dat lighter right da fuck now, dont ever say dat shit in mah face ever again in yo LIFE, honkyass, bitchass, crackerass nigga!"

He repeatedly waves his arms and hands around you in an attempt to intimidate you while constantly getting close enough to get some of his spit on your shirt and face. You wait for him to finish before telling him, "Get your own lighter".

At this point, his face turns red and you can tell he's seconds away from blowing up.

You ask yourself, 'How did things escalate to this?'

You say, "You want the lighter?"

"No shit dumbass crackerass honky!"

"Here".

You move your hand as if you're about to hand over the lighter, but then you throw it at the ground in front of him as hard as you can, smashing it into little pieces and sending lighter fluid and small sharp pieces of metal and plastic flying. At him, of course.

"Whoops, my hand slipped", you say nonchalantly, "If you still want it, guess you'll just have to pick up the pieces".

His face goes purple with rage now, but suddenly, he calms down and smiles and says, "No, bitchass nigga, YOU pick it up. RIGHT. NOW".

"I'm going home, don't follow me or I'll call the police".

The purple color returns to his face, his eyeballs bugging out with red veins coating them, as he shouts his battle cry, "HOLD UP NIGGA! DASS RAYCISS!"

He charges you, his arms and hands outstretched like pterodactyl claws, his mouth wide open with bits of spittle flying out, and his eyes in a wild frenzy. Meanwhile, you quickly draw your handgun and shoot him once in each kneecap. He quickly and easily falls down, his previous viciousness completely leaving him as he hugs his knees while crying loudly for his mother and yelling accusations of, "DASS RAYCISS! DASS RAYCISS! DASS HELLA RAYCISS!"

His cries are deafening even compared to your gun, and you take your leave posthaste. As you walk home with clear vision and the night sky watching over you, you put a cigarette to your lips. You put a glove on and hold the end of the cigarette between your fingers and snap, lighting it.

'That's right...no one knows my secret. That I use a lighter in public just so these occasions happen. Truly, I am mastermind of all masterminds'.

You laugh loudly into the warm summer air as darkness closes on you.