I can't trust my judgement anymore T_T Help
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I have a serious problem. For me it's finding partners. Or rather, GOOD partners.
And what I mean by that is. I can't rely on my judgement to find myself a good man cause I've come to the realization, that I think I like abusive men. I'm not sure why, whether its animes fault or not, but I think I've been this way for a while. It seriously turns me on and I've been masturbating a lot more to thoughts of me getting abused. I would tell myself to go to a counselor but I already have one ;_;
It's starting to bother me now, I'm not the type to physically hurt myself or anything so this is sort of unexpected. But even the guys that I crush on in anime, every single one of them have such abusive tendencies, and I don't want a guy like that in reality because I'm just a little thing who can't defend myself. It's spiraling out of control. At first I just thought I liked jerks but its become waaaaaay more then that, so now I don't know what to do.
And what I mean by that is. I can't rely on my judgement to find myself a good man cause I've come to the realization, that I think I like abusive men. I'm not sure why, whether its animes fault or not, but I think I've been this way for a while. It seriously turns me on and I've been masturbating a lot more to thoughts of me getting abused. I would tell myself to go to a counselor but I already have one ;_;
It's starting to bother me now, I'm not the type to physically hurt myself or anything so this is sort of unexpected. But even the guys that I crush on in anime, every single one of them have such abusive tendencies, and I don't want a guy like that in reality because I'm just a little thing who can't defend myself. It's spiraling out of control. At first I just thought I liked jerks but its become waaaaaay more then that, so now I don't know what to do.
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If you really are 13 i would love to say that you probably will grow out of it which is actually a good possibility, when i was 13 i thought i HAD to have this certain type of girl but i grew up and learned that they were the last thing i needed, but you seem to have one up on me cause you already know abusive guys are not the way to go, so i say stick with that thought. yea the thought of being abused will probably still turn you on, we all have dark fantasies that should just stay that.
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Tanasinn
The Bellpepper
it could just be one of those 'only in fantasy' fetishes
Like how some people like loli or guro but would never put themselves through that irl.
Like how some people like loli or guro but would never put themselves through that irl.
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I'm so sorry to hear that. :( Yeah, I'd suggest talking to your conselor about it, or someone else you can talk openly and safely to.
The important thing is that you are aware of this: it's better than unknowingly chasing after men that would hurt you, right? Face the fact that just because it turns you on does NOT mean you have to seek it out. Other things could come to replace this "fetish", imo, so just don't keep feeding more manga/anime of such situations to yourself.
Heck, if you can't help yourself, find a guy who ISN'T abusive. Maybe on occasion you can enact a fantasy, but safely...
But yeah, I'd speak to a pro about this. A forum can't solve all your problems, friendly and hopeful to help as we might be. :(
The important thing is that you are aware of this: it's better than unknowingly chasing after men that would hurt you, right? Face the fact that just because it turns you on does NOT mean you have to seek it out. Other things could come to replace this "fetish", imo, so just don't keep feeding more manga/anime of such situations to yourself.
Heck, if you can't help yourself, find a guy who ISN'T abusive. Maybe on occasion you can enact a fantasy, but safely...
But yeah, I'd speak to a pro about this. A forum can't solve all your problems, friendly and hopeful to help as we might be. :(
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To let you know that you are not alone really slutty girls have always for some reason turned me on, I mean girls that are really grimey, I always thought that i would end up with the classroom slut because of it, but the exact opposite is the case, you just got to keep logic and desire seperate...mental roleplaying helps as well lol.
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Firstbornnyc wrote...
To let you know that you are not alone really slutty girls have always for some reason turned me on, I mean girls that are really grimey, I always thought that i would end up with the classroom slut because of it, but the exact opposite is the case, you just got to keep logic and desire seperate...mental roleplaying helps as well lol.Seconding that. Never let your morals and values get skewed for the sake of sexual desires that you find upsetting but alluring.
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Well views and opinions change over time.What you might find you are crazy about at one point may not mean as much to you as time goes by.I used to think bondage was hot and such in the past but now I am more into the tender lovey dovey kinda one.
Its best to talk to a trusted person if it really bothers you.I hope you find a partner thats isnt a jerk cause I hate jerks lol.
Maybe you should watch more animes that has nice guys in them lol
Its best to talk to a trusted person if it really bothers you.I hope you find a partner thats isnt a jerk cause I hate jerks lol.
Maybe you should watch more animes that has nice guys in them lol
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Honestly, give it some time. It either grows on you or wears off. If you still can't cope, speak with someone else YOU can trust.
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There is nothing wrong with Hentai it's a mild fetish So is masochism ,most of the time. Remember there are a lot of people who are not jerks but would like to do a bit of sadism. Just don't let your fetish control who you choose for a relationship. The bedroom and the rest of the world are very seperate places.People who seem like they are not into a bit of S&M. Well you'd be presently surprised.
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Define abusive.
Abusive as in have amazing physical power and strength that can overcome many conflicts?
or
Abusive as in spanking you in the ass when having and not having sex.
or
Abusive as in Falcon Punching the shit out of you just for shits and giggles?
Abusive as in have amazing physical power and strength that can overcome many conflicts?
or
Abusive as in spanking you in the ass when having and not having sex.
or
Abusive as in Falcon Punching the shit out of you just for shits and giggles?
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GoodDay wrote...
Define abusive.Abusive as in have amazing physical power and strength that can overcome many conflicts?
or
Abusive as in spanking you in the ass when having and not having sex.
or
Abusive as in Falcon Punching the shit out of you just for shits and giggles?
Yes, that would help a little, knowing what exactly you meant by "abusive". Honestly, I think most people have covered what was needed to be said. Just make sure you keep your desire in check, and use common sense when choosing a partner. That being said, there's nothing wrong with being a masochist, and there's a healthy bunch of people willing to take on a slightly sadist role. As long as boundaries are set, like, in the bedroom (among other things), there's nothing really wrong.