Require An Ear Or Two To Listen

Hello to you all true believers and Fakku members, let me take some time to first say that I've been lurking through the site and find this to be quite a reliable group. As the title says, I just need an ear to help vent the eternal loneliness of that is probably similar to that of an innocent male role who's girlfriend is stolen due to many factors.

So tonight I wake up late at night to use the bathroom, tried going back to bed, but could not fall asleep. As I turn and roll in my bed, I felt a certain loneliness from the fact I was not able to get in touch with my girlfriend for the past week (this is a long distance relationship). To try and exhaust myself, I turn up my computer and checked around my Facebook and lurked in Fakku. It was on Facebook that I randomly checked her page and find that she has listed another man's name as her relationship partner and took me off her friend's list.

I will say that I was shocked that this happened, but more hurt at the fact she said nothing to me about anything. Now I sit here, writing my issues out on this forum because all my friend's are offline for the night and I feel that I can't go back to sleep or anything in this state.

For your courtesy, I thank you for taking a look at this, you can reply with anything you feel (yes, I do mean anything, including troll comments and lawlz). Normally I don't do this because I feel it bothers other people...but it feels really quiet tonight and I go insane in the quiet.

Man that sucks and even more because she didn't tell you about it. But as hard as it may sound shit happens and we need to learn to live with it and move on, in any case feel free to contact me just in case you need anything.:)

Im sorry to hear your loss and hope that sorrow and sadness will pass you soon.... As for the gf theres nothing much to say, she probably cheated on you and doesnt even care to explain it to you, honestly i wouldnt waste my time thinking about it any longer, would be great if you find another girl, a decent one not like this one who will support you in your life, also long distance relationships are a bad idea to begin with, every person i know who had such a thing broke up or was cheated on so try to learn from it that its hard to have such a relationship and try to get someone whos close to you. Well thats life i guess, shit happens try to get over it the best you can, less time you spend being hurt means more time to get on with your life.

Reminds me of the end of my own similar relationship. No contact for a while, then a countdown to her wedding suddenly shows up on her LiveJournal. And since she's divorced by now, doesn't seem to have been a smart idea on her part in any case...

As it seems, my lurking hasn't failed me. Even with the usual cold fact of "That's life.", it still eases the pain away to find people actually giving their input about it. Seriously, that does my heart good.

Yeah, I know stuff like this happens. I've been around the block a fair amount of times so it doesn't hurt that bad, I mean, what other choice is there other than dashing forward right?

Thats right, even if you refuse to go forward the world will continue to, the more time you spend on the same spot thats in the fact the time you could have spent to find someone new, some one who would actually understand and love you, also some kind of activity would be good to make your mind focus on other things and eventually you wont care about the past anymore, something creative would be good.

That was really low and cowardly of her. I remember reading something similar on fmylife.com, though I don't really have much advice to give you other than the one that has already been stated, which is to move on.

Don't worry, you'll definitely find someone better than that excuse for a hagwoman. =D

Hey, there are more fish in the sea than she could count. There are even those near your house. LOL. I truly feel for you man. The fact that she had that change without telling you tells me she wasnt wholeheartedly serious at all from the start. Itll tend to happen more often when one doesn't build trust between each other. Also like my bro up there Alshep, feel free to contact me. Ill do the best to my abilities to help.

This kind of thing is all too common online. Even I've had a brush with it. It's one of the reasons why I've pretty much sworn off long distance relationships as trust can only go so far.

For my own experience, I had befriended a girl I met through an anime forum and, over time, we became closer and closer. She was in college several states away and I was here and working so we couldn't see one another. Things were going well, we were talking on the phone on weekends for hours and hours. The usual lines were said, she'd never felt this way before, she'd never felt so connected to someone, we never wanted to stop talking, blah, blah, blah.

Then the disappearing acts started. She wasn't around, she wouldn't return calls or texts, she wasn't coming on AIM anymore. After a good week and a half to two weeks of that nonsense, I finally decided to check her online journal, which she had forgotten she'd showed me the address to. As you can no doubt guess, there it all was. That guy in her Japanese class had "finally" asked her out. She'd never felt this way before, she'd never felt so connected to someone, they never wanted to stop talking... Sound familiar?

So, yeah. I didn't bother with angry accusations or any of that bullshit because, by the time it gets to the point that she'd taken it to, she didn't care anymore. The disappearing act was her passive-aggressive way of giving me the online boot for someone who was closer. Why bother with a messy break up when you can just stop talking until they get the hint, right? I ended up just writing her a brief reply on her online journal telling her she was a hypocrite and a coward and just let it go.

Long distance relationships aren't worth it, by and large. They're too difficult for both parties. The longer you're apart, the less and less involved you are in one another's lives. Without even meaning to, sometimes, you just phase them out as you find other things to do with your time. CAN they work? Sure. Do most of them? Not in my experience. Trust becomes far too large an issue.

So, to Nhezu, I'm sorry you had to go through what you did. It's never a fun experience, regardless of how well you're dealing with it and it's a really shitty way to find out you're being cheated on. Having to find out through something like Facebook is messed up. Decent human beings don't treat people they supposedly had feelings for like that. So, even though you might be tired of hearing it, you DO deserve better than trash like your ex. She's a real jackass for treating you this way. It'll take a while but things'll get better for you, guaranteed. In the meantime, take some comfort in the fact that you didn't do anything wrong, she's the asshole here. If anything you should pity that guy she's with now because she'll probably cheat on him, too. It's never easy to see good in the bad but you're well out of any "relationship" with a skank who'll treat you this way.

Stay strong, brother. FAKKU's got your back.

I had put up this topic when I was confused and completely disoriented from the sudden development in my now dead relationship. From late night to dawn, I've gotten nothing but support and encouragement to push through this, for that I want to thank the Fakku community. I'll be honest, I was actually overwhelmed that I felt like breaking down because you guys are so awesome.

In the words of Harvey Dent from The Dark Knight, "The night is always darkest before the dawn.", and now the sun is out. So once more, thank you Fakku.net.

I'll be quick with this.

You'll be fine lad. Not even worth your time, girls like that aren't worth your time or effort.

Just an advice pal. Don't close your heart. World is filled with bitches like that one, but please, keep believing in people, so the day you meet a good woman, she wouldn't miss the chance to get your true feelings just because some stupid idiot before her made you feel bad.

It might hurt, but after a while, you get used to it.

Now, the obligatory anecdote:

I was still "friend" with my ex (from an online relationship). She was still all in love with me, she got jealousy even from a plotter in my work I called "Becky" and claimed that she was my wife. Then, she started hanging with a "friend" of her, kinda "like brothers" relationship. Then, suddenly she came out saying that she started liking him, I was like "go ahead", and she denied it, and was "supposedly" still in love with me. Now, she doesn't even come online, when she does, hardly talks to me, and logs out without even saying good bye. That's the power of love for you lol. In my case, not that I cared since I was the one that cut with her, and I encouraged her to go out with him. But it still too funny for me how her "deep love" for me was.

Awww you are heartbroken :( but yeah life tends to be tough we just need to learn to move on, and also don't worry keep your heart open till you find the right girl!^_^

After all the emotional runs I had today, I'm anything but discouraged and tempted to be cut off from the world. I did what I wanted to do, I tried to see this through as far as I can, can't get any more than that. I may not be open for a bit but I'm definitely going to kick up stuff when I'm ready. If there's one thing I know about this, despite knowing full well what might happen in this kind of relationship, I still stuck it out and I got patience and time to do it again in the future.

You're a strong man. Stronger than me at least, first time I was heartbroken I didn't talk to anyone or leave my house for months. Stay in good spirits, and nice to see you can move on.

PM me if you ever need to talk or ever need anything kay?^_^