Tis better to have loved and lost

Just want opinions on this. I got to thinking, is it really better that one has found love and lost it rather than never knowing it? Now, I mean this strictly in the context of a relationship. My thought is some where in between yes and no. What I mean is, sure love is a wonderful and an indescribable thing but once you have tasted it you long for it (at least for me) and if one has never experienced it in the context of a relationship then one never truly knows what they are missing. That's not to say that most don't desire it but until you have had it, it's just some kind of fantasy in your mind. Which by the way, it ain't perfect, love in this realm that is, although, it's pretty damn close.

In my opinion, yes, it's better to have loved and lost. Love, even if true, will have its share of ups and downs. Nothing's perfect in this world, but that's part of its appeal. You need to feel the pleasure and the pain of everything to really say you've experienced love, and therefore, life.

With my track record of my three ex's... i was better off with dudes.

A relationship is a relationship, male or female. Different dynamics I suppose but in the end it's the mutual acceptance and love of one another that makes it. We as humans have an understanding and a concept of "love" for a myriad of reasons, mostly involving survival of a species. We seek it for a common goal whether as a friend or a mate. It serves to protect and provide hence the chemical "reward" our brain gives us when we "feel" it that makes us feel good. It's a tool for group survival. So,in essence I more agree that we need it and seek it even on a more primal level. I do however as far, as relationships go,at times envy those whom only have an ideal and not an experience. Love is awesome but the bitterness and loneliness it leaves when gone seems to negate the experience and for some can create a cycle of seeking the next "high". Sorry, had to play devils advocate. Honestly though, I do believe true love trumps all, the in between parts are just a pain.

Despite what I did recently (Let my love go) I think it's better to have love and lost. Fight for what you love, and if it doesn't work out, you can think back to the good times you had, and realise it was worth it. If you never ask, you'll regret for the rest of your life. You'll always wonder what would have happened if you had actually asked that one person.
Which is why I'm going to fight back for what I love. Try my best to get her back, and make her happy. if it fails, fuck it, we'll hopefully still be friends. It would be worth the shot to make her happy again, and have her in my arms once again.

To lose love sucks balls but its even worse to have never had it.

I can say that it is better to have and lost... It hurts.... Tremendously. To the point where one will want to die. They start to doubt themselves and hate themselves. Questioning everything they had done with their loved one. Hating themselves for not doing things differently.

It is in this that one can find room to grow and improve. By reflecting on the fault and mistakes they've committed one can change and improve themselves. Reflect on what experiences with, that helped them and hurt them, to seek out someone better for them, who can make them a better person and support them the way they most need.

Having come out of a 6 year relationship I have many regrets (of many kinds), but I've learned much from it. That I had allowed her to have whatever she wanted because I had not wanted to hurt her. I had ignored problems because she didn't like confrontation. I sacrificed far too much while gaining very little. Spoiled her and found contempt in momentary happiness that was one sided. From these and so much more, I've learned so many things I will never forget. I will be able to find someone more in tuned and better suited for me because of it. I won't make the same mistakes again.

Regretfully the wounds of losing are quite painful, since mine was so long, I've been told it will last for awhile. But I think my gain in knowledge and experience is equivalent to the time. Though, again, the wound is dangerous. If I wasn't as aware of my thoughts and emotions as I am, I would have, in a wounded state, done quite a few undignified things out of desperation and loneliness. The pain is very dangerous and emotions work against you. When the gap is created people will desperately seek out something to replace it with. I still seek it out, unconsciously seeking out companionship. (Honestly I'm stuck at this part.)

I guess what I'm trying to say, that the emotional pain seriously outweighs the mental gain (the emotional pain being potentially harmful), but despite this it is still something worth while. To find someone who matters so much to the point that they can hurt so much when there gone. To find someone who can bring so much happiness and become so irreplaceable in life. To know of what I felt then and to know I can find it again, and that it can be even better is worth while.

It depends, do you have a strong enough will to overcome the pain associated with it?

No, then you'd be better off not knowing it because you would let it consume you.

Yes, then even with the pain, you get to know the feeling of love and would be able to use that feelings to find it against and better yourself.

And that is just romantic love. There's all sorts of different types that you would not ever realize.

It's definitely not something you should ever take for granted.

I'd like to lose my love... Had to...

I experienced both sides and I agree that love and lost is a lot better.

I was a shy kid to the point of practicing at home on how to talk to a girl, because I was in an all boys elementary school and my neighborhood I used to play with guys and girls were at the other side so no interactions. When I entered middle school and high school I had my problems with girls.

There was a girl that I liked a lot and was in my class. she was very pretty and had a smile that could melt any heart. But since I was so shy I was afraid of rejection or be friendzoned, so I didn't do a thing. The next year I finally confessed but was friendzoned and later learned that if I were to gather my courage the year before, I could have gotten a chance. The "What if..." killed me for that year. What's funny is that on my last year in high school she liked me a lot but I was not interested anymore.

There was another girl and this time I went with all I could, I didn't wanted the "what if..." feeling again. However I was not the only one and many were after her. For some reason she seemed to respond to me and we were getting closer since she broke up with her BF. Then after I graduated we made a promise to be a couple when she returned from her trip.... She never came back and I had to accept it. but the times with her were really nice and I don't regret much.

It's better to love and lost because you learn from that and you can get some good memories instead of wondering and daydreaming of things that could have happened starting with "What if..."

It's better to have have loved and lost then to be on the other side of the fence wondering what it would be like. There's a ton of threads in this section asking what is it like to have a relationship. Just take it as it is, an memorable experience. Usually when you ask a friend about their ex's they would talk about the more enjoyably memories they had with that particular person rather than the regrettable memories.

I'm not sure. I think there are some situations that would've been better to have just avoided altogether. It is nice to say you grow stronger from something just because you survived it, but that isn't always true. Especially in matters of love, you give so much of yourself away every single time - emotionally, physically, mentally, financially... sometimes I question if the jaded and cynical person who appears afterwards is really better for having endured the experience. It is better to be decisive when choosing romantic partners rather then fling against any opportunity under the guise that "Well, better to have loved and lost, then never loved at all!" Because, realistically, most of us have multiple opportunities to love and be loved by others. It is good to be a little bit more logical about it.

I feel the same "logic" you mention can be applied during the relationship as well. That the person thinks logically about the relationship and make sure they do not become ruled by there emotions to become too attached to someone they feel they can't be with. As well they take things into perspective, analyze the good the bad, find there faults and there ex's faults, learn from them, so they don't make the same mistakes. The mistakes they committed and the mistakes in choosing the same type of person.

I think trying is better than regretting. No matter how far friendship goes, I feel you can never truly know how well you and another person can be in tuned till you rely on each other, and only each other, in every way there is. That trial and error is necessary, not that they should jump into every random relationship, but not give up on a relationship before trying simply out of doubt.

I agree with you. But when it comes the time that you like someone and you feel that person might be worth the try, it's better to just go for it. Thinking too much may sometimes make you miss the good things that person has until it's too late and only a friendship can be attained.

Being logical is good, but sometimes following a impulse is not a bad idea.

Wow, dude.

I've got to say, artcellrox seems to be the raddest guy here.

I would have rather never loved then loved and lost. That shit sucks something hard.

I'd like to think so, but overall its better to love and to keep :P. Instead of losing. But I suppose things don't work out that way all the time ):.

Anyway, it is better to have loved and lost I think.

I agree with you.

Hearing the girl you like get fucked upstairs while you patiently wait downstairs I say was pretty damn painful.

I sort of want to know why you were even in that situation to begin with.