Weird Relationship

So I want some advice.

Chick from HS wants to have sort of a long distance relationship, but not officially "going out". I live in CT, while she's still back in NC, so we live like 10-12 hours away by car. Not exactly feasible to meet up on weekends.

The complicated part is that although she really misses me and wants me back in NC, she's willing to still go out with other guys especially since she loves to have sex (but she only has it with people she's going out with for a while).

So, this has been weighing a lot on my mind because I really do care about her, but I wouldn't think of going out with anybody at the moment because of this weird relationship. What does fakku think? Am I just being naive in being the faithful guy when I'm obviously not going to be with her other than random vacations and even then it's just for sex and hanging out for a weekend? Confused.

She basically sounds like she wants you to know she is up for a booty call.



Does this mean she is still going to be seeing and hooking up with other people since you guys are so far away?

Yeah. I haven't said it's bad or anything because, you know, she's far away and I can't have a serious relationship when I'm in college 6 states away or what not. We've had a pretty close relationship since I was in HS. We never went out, but lately she's been gotten closer to me and we talk every night even though we are so far away.

It's really complicated for me, I'm so confused. Yeah, I could probably sex her up whenever I want when I'm there, but I think both of us want something more than that...

O_O

Your with her, but no with her... sex is when she comes around or you go back home... she still date other people, your not... my advice is

Keep on with it but date people in your area.

It depends whether you are fine with the fact that she could be hooking up with other people because your not around. Essentially it would almost be like it is now. I think if you are "talking" then you both may want something more substantial than that.

Either you have to have an open relationship (and be okay with that of course) or you have to see if you can be faithful to each other. Perhaps your confusion comes from not knowing which one is more convenient or even possible.

If you're not going to visit her often and frequently, give up. She's gone. Shit happens.

Move the fuck on. Seriously.

She doesnt seem like a long-relationship material. If she wants to date other guys while you guys are sort of in a relationship, she might not be as reliable and will most likely not have a long lasting relationship. You can be friends, but seriously, you probably need to find someone else.

Figured as much. Just wanted to confirm.

Just makes it harder when she's all like I love you and stuff.

She's basically stringing you along for emotional support while she's single down there. Don't fool yourself into thinking she'll be nearly as devoted or lovey dovey on the phone with you after she starts dating another guy in earnest. For your own sake, start taking a page from her book and move on. Take what she says on the phone with a grain of salt. If she's not willing to wait for you and stay single in the meantime then "I love you" doesn't have a lot of real impact.

A lot of women play the string along game before finding someone new. It's not that surprising she did it to you.

Even so, still feels bad man. You're right though.

Anything deal with emotions can still feel bad. Especially if you were really wanting to make this thing work or see if it would.

But there is no way you could salvage a relationship from this. Not a working one anyways.

Clean cuts tend to hurt less, I've found. It's better to let it go now than let it keep on and get your hopes up every time she comes home to visit. That kind of hope can be a form of hell.

It sounds like a bad NTR set up.

Well to be honest I don't think you should try to work it out. Sounds like she wants you to be her shoulder to cry on. Like a Crutch so she can feel "safe" to try to go out with other guys while having you as a safety net or a back up plan. You should just let her go because if shes OK with going out with other guys then it doesn't seem like she has you in her heart or mind at all.

But as you said your not looking for anything serious right?

Well as a booty call it might work out. But personally I wouldn't go to such lengths for such things.

SOUNDS LIKE SHE WANTS TO TRAP YOU, BRO. WOMEN ARE BITCHES. STAY AWAY.

Honestly I wouldn't want to be in that situation...it's not a fun one. I recommend not getting too close if you're going to be the only faithful one. It'll fuck with you.

I figure that at this juncture, you would already know that she isn't looking for an exclusive relationship. Looks like she is not ready to be saddled with that responsibility and devotion of just dating you. You'll be better off dating someone else who can devote her time and affection solely for you. Good luck.

Oh Pen, when will you ever get over that girl? She's one of a million in the world. You have to realize that she doesn't represent the female gender and get over it.