Well... This is really shitty.
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So, I finally swallowed my nuts and asked a girl I knew out, had some dates, nice dinner, one or two movies. All has been going great. And we decided to have a relationship. But what I forget sometimes is that she has a low self-esteem at times. To be honest my Fakku brothers, this is my first girlfriend that I care deeply about. I've had many, didn't last long baw baw baw. Now, what I'm asking is for some advice you could say. I've tried many things to get that beautiful smile out of her again, bit she is shy. Not a big talker, big blusher, not talker. Any advice?
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Low self esteem is hard.
Don't let her put herself down: be supportive, don't poke fun at her insecurities, and stay positive to make her feel comfortable.
Don't let her put herself down: be supportive, don't poke fun at her insecurities, and stay positive to make her feel comfortable.
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Keep at it, even tho it doesnt seem like what your doing is having any affect she appreciates it, she is just to shy to show it.
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Don't dare to be pushy, let her take some time. Give complements on little things, like her earrings. It seems like you should take the lead in most conversations, but keep it in mind that silence can be nice, too. Keep talking about what you like and try to remember what interests her. It is easier to talk about a particular thing, like a certain song, than about general things, like music, you know. You will get pluspoints when you can figure out what she likes and show it causally^^ I hope this helps, but I'm just talking from my own point of view,
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Best advice I can give you is just be yourself with her, the more comfortable with you she is the more she'll open up. Love is something that settles into your bones after a while. Just give it some time.
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just go with the flow my brother. well id like to say that but really you must help ur gf whose got a low self estem to brighten up so she we wont be shy at others u gotta do tha for her. well im just saying this as an observer because i myself dont have a girlfriend at the moment. damn. well hope both of u end up happy.
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Takerial
Lovable Teddy Bear
Docile girls are annoying, they always leave you to decide things and never give a challenge.
Fucking boring.
Fucking boring.
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Takerial wrote...
Docile girls are annoying, they always leave you to decide things and never give a challenge.Fucking boring.
Maybe there's a REASON they're like that?
People who act so reserved often have a history of having been pushed around...
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Meh. I love my shy girlfriend. I don't pick at her insecurities at all. Big no-no. However, IT IS quite enjoyable to make her blush. Thank you my Fakku brethren.
On a side note: kinda' odd how one day, I'm on here or other H sites dicking around, then bump into her. World works weird huh?
Once again, thanks. 'preciate it.
On a side note: kinda' odd how one day, I'm on here or other H sites dicking around, then bump into her. World works weird huh?
Once again, thanks. 'preciate it.
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Soma1230 wrote...
Meh. I love my shy girlfriend. I don't pick at her insecurities at all. Big no-no. However, IT IS quite enjoyable to make her blush. Thank you my Fakku brethren. On a side note: kinda' odd how one day, I'm on here or other H sites dicking around, then bump into her. World works weird huh?
Once again, thanks. 'preciate it.
You met her through an H site like fakku, or just by random coincidence you discovered you both go on them?
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....(,_,) Hey wait, I thought all that nervous people do is smile? xD Maybe thats just me and how I was raised cause on the outside its all ":)" But inside "AAAAAAAAAAAGH! DDX" xD Not always of course lol. But um...I think you should just be yourself, but not so pushy and ask her "if its ok" when u want to do something. I think that's reassuring. o: Being polite helps too. You can slowly open up to new things about urself that u think would make a shy girl uncomfortable.
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Like everyone already stated. Compliment her: eyes, hair, etc..
Never force her. Keep talking to her even if she gives you nothing back. Her shyness will eventually become into outgoing.
Never force her. Keep talking to her even if she gives you nothing back. Her shyness will eventually become into outgoing.
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I don't mean to be rude, but..
Is it really that difficult..? This is why I question the word: Love
I question people who go into relationships without understanding the other. Both are to blame.
I hate shy people, why? Because I'm shy and I hate myself. However, although I'm shy I speak confidently in front of crowds; how, I do not know.
Find out your flaws, and make them obvious to her, make them obvious to you. What drives shy people away is confidence. But don't create a facade.
Fight shyness with stronger shyness, be unwilling with the unwilling. Don't chase after the nervousness, be nervous too. Make it clear that you're a person who doesn't like things that would bother her, and since you're in a relationship, those things should be easy to find out. Put her in control with her shyness, because believe it or not, when a couple is engaged, it's the woman who has control, that's a reality.
Is it really that difficult..? This is why I question the word: Love
I question people who go into relationships without understanding the other. Both are to blame.
I hate shy people, why? Because I'm shy and I hate myself. However, although I'm shy I speak confidently in front of crowds; how, I do not know.
Find out your flaws, and make them obvious to her, make them obvious to you. What drives shy people away is confidence. But don't create a facade.
Fight shyness with stronger shyness, be unwilling with the unwilling. Don't chase after the nervousness, be nervous too. Make it clear that you're a person who doesn't like things that would bother her, and since you're in a relationship, those things should be easy to find out. Put her in control with her shyness, because believe it or not, when a couple is engaged, it's the woman who has control, that's a reality.
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Ive never liked girls that are shy and stuff, but since you already got one as a girlfriend your best shot is to try hard as much as you can, everyone opens up sooner or later.
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All opinions and statements are taken serious. No need to apologize for being rude, I guess she's had some tough Ex's who treated her like property. I see it as we're still two different people. I want her to be happy and smile, but forcing that is not a goal nor' an intention. Simple as that I guess.