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30 days before Christmas

Pages 123
1
Odamust
11 years ago
A bit too early. I guess it's now or never.
0
Odamust
11 years ago
SolidShark wrote...
Odamust wrote...
A bit too early. I guess it's now or never.


I know we can make it if we take it slow.


But...I gotta go fast.
1
Kiraneko
11 years ago
Odamust wrote...
SolidShark wrote...
Odamust wrote...
A bit too early. I guess it's now or never.


I know we can make it if we take it slow.


But...I gotta go fast.


Spoiler:
Forum Image: http://fc07.deviantart.net/fs71/f/2012/142/6/0/maid_sonic_by_midowko-d50qeif.png

I think ill be the grinch this year.
4
PumpJack McGee
11 years ago
Ah sweet, I found my Christmas album that I still need to record sometime.

Titles denote tune.

Jingle Bells
Spoiler:

Jiggly jowls
Swollen bowels
Cardiac arrest
These are signs that you are fat so give fast food a rest.

Jiggly jowls
Swollen bowels
Cardiac arrest
These are signs that you are fat so give fast food a rest.

Dashing through the mall, looking for new pants
Circumference of my waist, Length of tour de France.
Going to MickeyD’s
May I have a Big Mac Please?
With 8 beef patties, doused in grease, and 15 pounds of cheese.



Little Drummer Boy
Spoiler:
Aaaa- Kaaay Forty seven
Ara-tata-taaa
I just turned seven
Ara-tata-taaa

Marching, sunrise sunset
Ara-tata-taaa
Gunned down by turrets
Ara-tata-taaa
Ratata-taaa
Ratata-taaa

Drafted from day of birth
Ara-tata-taaa
Uganda

Equipment are antiques
Ara-tata-taaa
Meals every eight weeks
Ara-tata-taaa

Serving duty right now
Ara-tata-taaa
Will never hit puberty now
Ara-tata-taaa
Ratata-taaa
Ratata-taaa

We fight for essentials
Ara-tata-taaa
Uganda

Ridden, by disease
Ara-tata-taaa
Cripples, and amputees
Ara-tata-taaa

Living in constant fear
Ara-tata-taaa
War reigns forever here
Ara-tata-taaa
Ratata-taaa
Ratata-taaa

Where children fight wars
Ara-tata-taaa
Africa


Let It Snow (You can tell these things are old- this was in reference to the '08 Recession)
Spoiler:

Oh the economy now is frightful,
The banks are no longer that full.
So it’s out on the streets we go.
Out we go. Out we go. Out we go.

There’s no change in our luck in sight now
So the luxuries we delight now
Are going out with the Repo.
The Repo. The Repo. The Repo.

Clearance sales are all around.
But I’m afraid it’s too little too late.
Wallstreet is going down.
Unlike the unemployment rate.

Businesses are quickly dying.
Former billionaires are now all crying.
Now they’re all just hobos.
Just hobos. Just hobos. Just hobos.



White Christmas
Spoiler:
I’m dreamin’ of a White Christmas
Just like the ones I used to know
With the Niggers pickin’
And the Foremen whippin’
Whenever they picked too slow.

I’m dreamin’ of a White Christmas
Where coloured people have no rights.
With every lawn with crosses, burnin’ bright
May all your Christmases be White.

I’m dreamin’ of a White Christmas
Just like the ones I used to know
With the Niggers pickin’
And the Foremen whippin’
Whenever they picked too slow.

I’m dreamin’ of a White Christmas
Where coloured people have no rights.
With every lawn with crosses, burnin’ bright
May all your Christmases be White.


Silent Night
Spoiler:
Silent knife, sliding right
Out of view, out of sight
Bleed yon wretched mother and kids
No one will ever know what I did
Sleep in torturous pain
Sleep in torturous pain
Silent night, holy night
Not complete without a fight
In the alleys where cops dare not go
I cheerfully gut several hoes
Watch their bodies turn cold
Watch their bodies turn cold

Silent night, holy night
Orphanage, I set alight
Bombed local schools and City Hall
Robbed the bank and gassed the Mall
Wonderful anarchy
Wonderful anarchy


NoëL
Spoiler:
In Jail, In Jail, In Jail, In Jail
I’m still waiting for my Bail!

First night in jail, my cellmate did say:
“Thirty lonely years with no one made me gay”
Obviously enough, I did not sleep
Thrusting and pounding, he pushed it in deep.
In Jail, In Jail, In Jail, In Jail
I’m still waiting for my Bail!

First verse, I’m sure, you already are
Must be severely mentally scarred.
But there is no improvement in sight
He raped me again the following night.
In Jail, In Jail, In Jail, In Jail
I’m still waiting for my Bail!

By this time, you can tell, that my arse
Was violated nightly, my face 'gainst the bars
He’d keep going until he was spent
But at the very least I don’t have to pay rent.
In Jail, In Jail, In Jail, In Jail
I’m still waiting for my Bail!

My time is a butt-fucking fest
Not once can I get some decent rest
Sure, the food’s free, and it’s a place to stay
But my anal virginity was the price to pay!
In Jail, In Jail, In Jail, In Jail
I’m still waiting for my Bail!

But hold on, it gets worse, now I’m down on my knees
Sucking his cock is now part of my fee.
Being his bitch, it’s fucking intense
Long have I stopped putting up a defence
In Jail, In Jail, In Jail, In Jail
I’m still waiting for my Bail!

Six years now, since I’ve become a manwhore
Traffic is regular, around my back door.
I don’t care anymore, I welcome every cumshot
Forever shall I stay here, ass-raped †˜till I rot.
In Jail, In Jail, In Jail, In Jail
I don’t give a fuck if I ever get Bail.


Rudolph
Spoiler:
Adolf, the Nazi Leader
Killed tons of Jews in throes
And if you didn’t like it
It’s off to Auschwitz you’ll go

And there was the SS Leader
Heinrich Himmler was his name
Torture and horrific murder
Was his idea of a jolly good game

Then one foggy Christmas Eve
A Warden came to say
"Mein freund, isch so dark tonight-
Vy nacht set dese Kikes alight?"

And so the had a merry bonfire
Just like a Nazi Jamboree.
Adolf, the Nazi Leader
He'll go down in history.

Adolf, the Nazi Leader
He'll go down in his-to-ryyyyyyy.


Frosty The Snowman
Spoiler:

Frothy, the Blowman
Was a poor pathetic soul
With no dignity and his addiction
Were starting to take their toll

Frothy, the Blowman
Was a fine young man they say
A long time ago, but the people know
How it all started one day

It was about 10 years now
In a dirty dank street downtown
Struck some deals with some shifty types
Then he was snorting cocaine by the pound

Frothy, the Blowman
Was as high as one can be
And the people say, that sometime, someday
He would eventually O.D.

Woohoohoo-hoo-hoo
Woohoohoo-hoo-hoo
Look at Frothy go
Woohoohoo-hoo-hoo
Woohoohoo-hoo-hoo
Flying sky-high with Blow

Frothy, the Blowman
Sniffed one sniff too much one day
Jumped and yelled “Zip-zing! Zoop Yippity-SCHWING!”
And was soon off on his way.

He pranced down to the mall strip
With a stolen machine gun in his hands
Mall Rat, Mall cop, he killed both alike
Murderous antics of a madman

Then came the SWAT team
And they hauled Frothy away
He just laughed and cried,
“This Hell ain’t Good-Bye, I’ll be back again someday”.

Woohoohoo-hoo-hoo
Woohoohoo-hoo-hoo
Look at Frothy go
Woohoohoo-hoo-hoo
Woohoohoo-hoo-hoo
Flying sky-high with Blow.


All Ye Faithful (Not Finished Yet)
Spoiler:

Oh come, all ye children
Into my Big White Van
Oh come ye, all ye kiddies
Ignore the bulge in my pants

Oh come into my basement
I have for you a present
No need to tell your parents
Once you’re within my doors.

Now that you’re all inside
Wouldn’t you take a nice rest?
Oh trust me, you’ll need plenty
Now that you’re my slav- uh- guests.

Would you like a Lollipop
Oh no, it seems it has dropped
Can you bend down, pick it up
Just get down on the floor.


Joy to the World
Spoiler:

Destroy the World, let Hellfire come
And let it burn everything (Down to the ground)
Get ready for Eternal Doom
†˜Cause World War 3 is coming soon
With Air Raids and Mass Bombings
With Air Raids and Mass Bombings
With Air Raids, and Air Raids, and Mass Bombings

Destroy the World, let terror reign
And whole armies deploy (Like toy soldiers)
With tanks and ships, rockets and planes
And when the Troops get killed and maimed
Draft every girl and boy
Draft every girl and boy
Draft every, draft every, girl and boy

Panic like there’s no tomorrow
No shelter to be found (Nowhere to run)
Watch everything you hold dear go
Up in smoke at Ground Zero
As cities crumble to the ground
As cities crumble to the ground
As cities, as cities crumble to the ground.

Let’s fire the nukes all over the place
For now the End has come (Oh shit we’re screwed)
All life on Earth will be erased
Poof. Zip. Gone. Without a trace.
And witness Armageddon
And witness Armageddon
And witness, and witness, Armageddon

And witness,
And witness,
Armageddon.


Feel free to suggest others.
0
Sgt.broski Where's the futa Jacob
11 years ago
PumpJack McGee wrote...
Ah sweet, I found my Christmas album that I still need to record sometime.

Titles denote tune.

Jingle Bells
Spoiler:

Jiggly jowls
Swollen bowels
Cardiac arrest
These are signs that you are fat so give fast food a rest.

Jiggly jowls
Swollen bowels
Cardiac arrest
These are signs that you are fat so give fast food a rest.

Dashing through the mall, looking for new pants
Circumference of my waist, Length of tour de France.
Going to MickeyD’s
May I have a Big Mac Please?
With 8 beef patties, doused in grease, and 15 pounds of cheese.



Little Drummer Boy
Spoiler:
Aaaa- Kaaay Forty seven
Ara-tata-taaa
I just turned seven
Ara-tata-taaa

Marching, sunrise sunset
Ara-tata-taaa
Gunned down by turrets
Ara-tata-taaa
Ratata-taaa
Ratata-taaa

Drafted from day of birth
Ara-tata-taaa
Uganda

Equipment are antiques
Ara-tata-taaa
Meals every eight weeks
Ara-tata-taaa

Serving duty right now
Ara-tata-taaa
Will never hit puberty now
Ara-tata-taaa
Ratata-taaa
Ratata-taaa

We fight for essentials
Ara-tata-taaa
Uganda

Ridden, by disease
Ara-tata-taaa
Cripples, and amputees
Ara-tata-taaa

Living in constant fear
Ara-tata-taaa
War reigns forever here
Ara-tata-taaa
Ratata-taaa
Ratata-taaa

Where children fight wars
Ara-tata-taaa
Africa


Let It Snow (You can tell these things are old- this was in reference to the '08 Recession)
Spoiler:

Oh the economy now is frightful,
The banks are no longer that full.
So it’s out on the streets we go.
Out we go. Out we go. Out we go.

There’s no change in our luck in sight now
So the luxuries we delight now
Are going out with the Repo.
The Repo. The Repo. The Repo.

Clearance sales are all around.
But I’m afraid it’s too little too late.
Wallstreet is going down.
Unlike the unemployment rate.

Businesses are quickly dying.
Former billionaires are now all crying.
Now they’re all just hobos.
Just hobos. Just hobos. Just hobos.



White Christmas
Spoiler:
I’m dreamin’ of a White Christmas
Just like the ones I used to know
With the Niggers pickin’
And the Foremen whippin’
Whenever they picked too slow.

I’m dreamin’ of a White Christmas
Where coloured people have no rights.
With every lawn with crosses, burnin’ bright
May all your Christmases be White.

I’m dreamin’ of a White Christmas
Just like the ones I used to know
With the Niggers pickin’
And the Foremen whippin’
Whenever they picked too slow.

I’m dreamin’ of a White Christmas
Where coloured people have no rights.
With every lawn with crosses, burnin’ bright
May all your Christmases be White.


Silent Night
Spoiler:
Silent knife, sliding right
Out of view, out of sight
Bleed yon wretched mother and kids
No one will ever know what I did
Sleep in torturous pain
Sleep in torturous pain
Silent night, holy night
Not complete without a fight
In the alleys where cops dare not go
I cheerfully gut several hoes
Watch their bodies turn cold
Watch their bodies turn cold

Silent night, holy night
Orphanage, I set alight
Bombed local schools and City Hall
Robbed the bank and gassed the Mall
Wonderful anarchy
Wonderful anarchy


NoëL
Spoiler:
In Jail, In Jail, In Jail, In Jail
I’m still waiting for my Bail!

First night in jail, my cellmate did say:
“Thirty lonely years with no one made me gay”
Obviously enough, I did not sleep
Thrusting and pounding, he pushed it in deep.
In Jail, In Jail, In Jail, In Jail
I’m still waiting for my Bail!

First verse, I’m sure, you already are
Must be severely mentally scarred.
But there is no improvement in sight
He raped me again the following night.
In Jail, In Jail, In Jail, In Jail
I’m still waiting for my Bail!

By this time, you can tell, that my arse
Was violated nightly, my face 'gainst the bars
He’d keep going until he was spent
But at the very least I don’t have to pay rent.
In Jail, In Jail, In Jail, In Jail
I’m still waiting for my Bail!

My time is a butt-fucking fest
Not once can I get some decent rest
Sure, the food’s free, and it’s a place to stay
But my anal virginity was the price to pay!
In Jail, In Jail, In Jail, In Jail
I’m still waiting for my Bail!

But hold on, it gets worse, now I’m down on my knees
Sucking his cock is now part of my fee.
Being his bitch, it’s fucking intense
Long have I stopped putting up a defence
In Jail, In Jail, In Jail, In Jail
I’m still waiting for my Bail!

Six years now, since I’ve become a manwhore
Traffic is regular, around my back door.
I don’t care anymore, I welcome every cumshot
Forever shall I stay here, ass-raped †˜till I rot.
In Jail, In Jail, In Jail, In Jail
I don’t give a fuck if I ever get Bail.


Rudolph
Spoiler:
Adolf, the Nazi Leader
Killed tons of Jews in throes
And if you didn’t like it
It’s off to Auschwitz you’ll go

And there was the SS Leader
Heinrich Himmler was his name
Torture and horrific murder
Was his idea of a jolly good game

Then one foggy Christmas Eve
A Warden came to say
"Mein freund, isch so dark tonight-
Vy nacht set dese Kikes alight?"

And so the had a merry bonfire
Just like a Nazi Jamboree.
Adolf, the Nazi Leader
He'll go down in history.

Adolf, the Nazi Leader
He'll go down in his-to-ryyyyyyy.


Frosty The Snowman
Spoiler:

Frothy, the Blowman
Was a poor pathetic soul
With no dignity and his addiction
Were starting to take their toll

Frothy, the Blowman
Was a fine young man they say
A long time ago, but the people know
How it all started one day

It was about 10 years now
In a dirty dank street downtown
Struck some deals with some shifty types
Then he was snorting cocaine by the pound

Frothy, the Blowman
Was as high as one can be
And the people say, that sometime, someday
He would eventually O.D.

Woohoohoo-hoo-hoo
Woohoohoo-hoo-hoo
Look at Frothy go
Woohoohoo-hoo-hoo
Woohoohoo-hoo-hoo
Flying sky-high with Blow

Frothy, the Blowman
Sniffed one sniff too much one day
Jumped and yelled “Zip-zing! Zoop Yippity-SCHWING!”
And was soon off on his way.

He pranced down to the mall strip
With a stolen machine gun in his hands
Mall Rat, Mall cop, he killed both alike
Murderous antics of a madman

Then came the SWAT team
And they hauled Frothy away
He just laughed and cried,
“This Hell ain’t Good-Bye, I’ll be back again someday”.

Woohoohoo-hoo-hoo
Woohoohoo-hoo-hoo
Look at Frothy go
Woohoohoo-hoo-hoo
Woohoohoo-hoo-hoo
Flying sky-high with Blow.


All Ye Faithful (Not Finished Yet)
Spoiler:

Oh come, all ye children
Into my Big White Van
Oh come ye, all ye kiddies
Ignore the bulge in my pants

Oh come into my basement
I have for you a present
No need to tell your parents
Once you’re within my doors.

Now that you’re all inside
Wouldn’t you take a nice rest?
Oh trust me, you’ll need plenty
Now that you’re my slav- uh- guests.

Would you like a Lollipop
Oh no, it seems it has dropped
Can you bend down, pick it up
Just get down on the floor.


Joy to the World
Spoiler:

Destroy the World, let Hellfire come
And let it burn everything (Down to the ground)
Get ready for Eternal Doom
†˜Cause World War 3 is coming soon
With Air Raids and Mass Bombings
With Air Raids and Mass Bombings
With Air Raids, and Air Raids, and Mass Bombings

Destroy the World, let terror reign
And whole armies deploy (Like toy soldiers)
With tanks and ships, rockets and planes
And when the Troops get killed and maimed
Draft every girl and boy
Draft every girl and boy
Draft every, draft every, girl and boy

Panic like there’s no tomorrow
No shelter to be found (Nowhere to run)
Watch everything you hold dear go
Up in smoke at Ground Zero
As cities crumble to the ground
As cities crumble to the ground
As cities, as cities crumble to the ground.

Let’s fire the nukes all over the place
For now the End has come (Oh shit we’re screwed)
All life on Earth will be erased
Poof. Zip. Gone. Without a trace.
And witness Armageddon
And witness Armageddon
And witness, and witness, Armageddon

And witness,
And witness,
Armageddon.


Feel free to suggest others.


10 for creative
10 for funniest
10 for pure epic.
+5 for christmas.

Add those all together and thats how much +reps you should have for this.
2
Sneakyone
11 years ago
Joining the Bandwagon.
0
PumpJack McGee
11 years ago
Sgt.broski wrote...
PumpJack McGee wrote...
Ah sweet, I found my Christmas album that I still need to record sometime.

Titles denote tune.

Jingle Bells
Spoiler:

Jiggly jowls
Swollen bowels
Cardiac arrest
These are signs that you are fat so give fast food a rest.

Jiggly jowls
Swollen bowels
Cardiac arrest
These are signs that you are fat so give fast food a rest.

Dashing through the mall, looking for new pants
Circumference of my waist, Length of tour de France.
Going to MickeyD’s
May I have a Big Mac Please?
With 8 beef patties, doused in grease, and 15 pounds of cheese.



Little Drummer Boy
Spoiler:
Aaaa- Kaaay Forty seven
Ara-tata-taaa
I just turned seven
Ara-tata-taaa

Marching, sunrise sunset
Ara-tata-taaa
Gunned down by turrets
Ara-tata-taaa
Ratata-taaa
Ratata-taaa

Drafted from day of birth
Ara-tata-taaa
Uganda

Equipment are antiques
Ara-tata-taaa
Meals every eight weeks
Ara-tata-taaa

Serving duty right now
Ara-tata-taaa
Will never hit puberty now
Ara-tata-taaa
Ratata-taaa
Ratata-taaa

We fight for essentials
Ara-tata-taaa
Uganda

Ridden, by disease
Ara-tata-taaa
Cripples, and amputees
Ara-tata-taaa

Living in constant fear
Ara-tata-taaa
War reigns forever here
Ara-tata-taaa
Ratata-taaa
Ratata-taaa

Where children fight wars
Ara-tata-taaa
Africa


Let It Snow (You can tell these things are old- this was in reference to the '08 Recession)
Spoiler:

Oh the economy now is frightful,
The banks are no longer that full.
So it’s out on the streets we go.
Out we go. Out we go. Out we go.

There’s no change in our luck in sight now
So the luxuries we delight now
Are going out with the Repo.
The Repo. The Repo. The Repo.

Clearance sales are all around.
But I’m afraid it’s too little too late.
Wallstreet is going down.
Unlike the unemployment rate.

Businesses are quickly dying.
Former billionaires are now all crying.
Now they’re all just hobos.
Just hobos. Just hobos. Just hobos.



White Christmas
Spoiler:
I’m dreamin’ of a White Christmas
Just like the ones I used to know
With the Niggers pickin’
And the Foremen whippin’
Whenever they picked too slow.

I’m dreamin’ of a White Christmas
Where coloured people have no rights.
With every lawn with crosses, burnin’ bright
May all your Christmases be White.

I’m dreamin’ of a White Christmas
Just like the ones I used to know
With the Niggers pickin’
And the Foremen whippin’
Whenever they picked too slow.

I’m dreamin’ of a White Christmas
Where coloured people have no rights.
With every lawn with crosses, burnin’ bright
May all your Christmases be White.


Silent Night
Spoiler:
Silent knife, sliding right
Out of view, out of sight
Bleed yon wretched mother and kids
No one will ever know what I did
Sleep in torturous pain
Sleep in torturous pain
Silent night, holy night
Not complete without a fight
In the alleys where cops dare not go
I cheerfully gut several hoes
Watch their bodies turn cold
Watch their bodies turn cold

Silent night, holy night
Orphanage, I set alight
Bombed local schools and City Hall
Robbed the bank and gassed the Mall
Wonderful anarchy
Wonderful anarchy


NoëL
Spoiler:
In Jail, In Jail, In Jail, In Jail
I’m still waiting for my Bail!

First night in jail, my cellmate did say:
“Thirty lonely years with no one made me gay”
Obviously enough, I did not sleep
Thrusting and pounding, he pushed it in deep.
In Jail, In Jail, In Jail, In Jail
I’m still waiting for my Bail!

First verse, I’m sure, you already are
Must be severely mentally scarred.
But there is no improvement in sight
He raped me again the following night.
In Jail, In Jail, In Jail, In Jail
I’m still waiting for my Bail!

By this time, you can tell, that my arse
Was violated nightly, my face 'gainst the bars
He’d keep going until he was spent
But at the very least I don’t have to pay rent.
In Jail, In Jail, In Jail, In Jail
I’m still waiting for my Bail!

My time is a butt-fucking fest
Not once can I get some decent rest
Sure, the food’s free, and it’s a place to stay
But my anal virginity was the price to pay!
In Jail, In Jail, In Jail, In Jail
I’m still waiting for my Bail!

But hold on, it gets worse, now I’m down on my knees
Sucking his cock is now part of my fee.
Being his bitch, it’s fucking intense
Long have I stopped putting up a defence
In Jail, In Jail, In Jail, In Jail
I’m still waiting for my Bail!

Six years now, since I’ve become a manwhore
Traffic is regular, around my back door.
I don’t care anymore, I welcome every cumshot
Forever shall I stay here, ass-raped †˜till I rot.
In Jail, In Jail, In Jail, In Jail
I don’t give a fuck if I ever get Bail.


Rudolph
Spoiler:
Adolf, the Nazi Leader
Killed tons of Jews in throes
And if you didn’t like it
It’s off to Auschwitz you’ll go

And there was the SS Leader
Heinrich Himmler was his name
Torture and horrific murder
Was his idea of a jolly good game

Then one foggy Christmas Eve
A Warden came to say
"Mein freund, isch so dark tonight-
Vy nacht set dese Kikes alight?"

And so the had a merry bonfire
Just like a Nazi Jamboree.
Adolf, the Nazi Leader
He'll go down in history.

Adolf, the Nazi Leader
He'll go down in his-to-ryyyyyyy.


Frosty The Snowman
Spoiler:

Frothy, the Blowman
Was a poor pathetic soul
With no dignity and his addiction
Were starting to take their toll

Frothy, the Blowman
Was a fine young man they say
A long time ago, but the people know
How it all started one day

It was about 10 years now
In a dirty dank street downtown
Struck some deals with some shifty types
Then he was snorting cocaine by the pound

Frothy, the Blowman
Was as high as one can be
And the people say, that sometime, someday
He would eventually O.D.

Woohoohoo-hoo-hoo
Woohoohoo-hoo-hoo
Look at Frothy go
Woohoohoo-hoo-hoo
Woohoohoo-hoo-hoo
Flying sky-high with Blow

Frothy, the Blowman
Sniffed one sniff too much one day
Jumped and yelled “Zip-zing! Zoop Yippity-SCHWING!”
And was soon off on his way.

He pranced down to the mall strip
With a stolen machine gun in his hands
Mall Rat, Mall cop, he killed both alike
Murderous antics of a madman

Then came the SWAT team
And they hauled Frothy away
He just laughed and cried,
“This Hell ain’t Good-Bye, I’ll be back again someday”.

Woohoohoo-hoo-hoo
Woohoohoo-hoo-hoo
Look at Frothy go
Woohoohoo-hoo-hoo
Woohoohoo-hoo-hoo
Flying sky-high with Blow.


All Ye Faithful (Not Finished Yet)
Spoiler:

Oh come, all ye children
Into my Big White Van
Oh come ye, all ye kiddies
Ignore the bulge in my pants

Oh come into my basement
I have for you a present
No need to tell your parents
Once you’re within my doors.

Now that you’re all inside
Wouldn’t you take a nice rest?
Oh trust me, you’ll need plenty
Now that you’re my slav- uh- guests.

Would you like a Lollipop
Oh no, it seems it has dropped
Can you bend down, pick it up
Just get down on the floor.


Joy to the World
Spoiler:

Destroy the World, let Hellfire come
And let it burn everything (Down to the ground)
Get ready for Eternal Doom
†˜Cause World War 3 is coming soon
With Air Raids and Mass Bombings
With Air Raids and Mass Bombings
With Air Raids, and Air Raids, and Mass Bombings

Destroy the World, let terror reign
And whole armies deploy (Like toy soldiers)
With tanks and ships, rockets and planes
And when the Troops get killed and maimed
Draft every girl and boy
Draft every girl and boy
Draft every, draft every, girl and boy

Panic like there’s no tomorrow
No shelter to be found (Nowhere to run)
Watch everything you hold dear go
Up in smoke at Ground Zero
As cities crumble to the ground
As cities crumble to the ground
As cities, as cities crumble to the ground.

Let’s fire the nukes all over the place
For now the End has come (Oh shit we’re screwed)
All life on Earth will be erased
Poof. Zip. Gone. Without a trace.
And witness Armageddon
And witness Armageddon
And witness, and witness, Armageddon

And witness,
And witness,
Armageddon.


Feel free to suggest others.


10 for creative
10 for funniest
10 for pure epic.
+5 for christmas.

Add those all together and thats how much +reps you should have for this.


I wrote all those in one inspired night. I've always wanted to record it, but I can't music.

I suppose I could acapella the whole thing, but I'd really prefer actual instruments and musicians. A choir for some of them (especially Destroy The World), too.
0
Peltor
11 years ago
PumpJack McGee wrote...
Sgt.broski wrote...
PumpJack McGee wrote...
Ah sweet, I found my Christmas album that I still need to record sometime.

Titles denote tune.

Jingle Bells
Spoiler:

Jiggly jowls
Swollen bowels
Cardiac arrest
These are signs that you are fat so give fast food a rest.

Jiggly jowls
Swollen bowels
Cardiac arrest
These are signs that you are fat so give fast food a rest.

Dashing through the mall, looking for new pants
Circumference of my waist, Length of tour de France.
Going to MickeyD’s
May I have a Big Mac Please?
With 8 beef patties, doused in grease, and 15 pounds of cheese.



Little Drummer Boy
Spoiler:
Aaaa- Kaaay Forty seven
Ara-tata-taaa
I just turned seven
Ara-tata-taaa

Marching, sunrise sunset
Ara-tata-taaa
Gunned down by turrets
Ara-tata-taaa
Ratata-taaa
Ratata-taaa

Drafted from day of birth
Ara-tata-taaa
Uganda

Equipment are antiques
Ara-tata-taaa
Meals every eight weeks
Ara-tata-taaa

Serving duty right now
Ara-tata-taaa
Will never hit puberty now
Ara-tata-taaa
Ratata-taaa
Ratata-taaa

We fight for essentials
Ara-tata-taaa
Uganda

Ridden, by disease
Ara-tata-taaa
Cripples, and amputees
Ara-tata-taaa

Living in constant fear
Ara-tata-taaa
War reigns forever here
Ara-tata-taaa
Ratata-taaa
Ratata-taaa

Where children fight wars
Ara-tata-taaa
Africa


Let It Snow (You can tell these things are old- this was in reference to the '08 Recession)
Spoiler:

Oh the economy now is frightful,
The banks are no longer that full.
So it’s out on the streets we go.
Out we go. Out we go. Out we go.

There’s no change in our luck in sight now
So the luxuries we delight now
Are going out with the Repo.
The Repo. The Repo. The Repo.

Clearance sales are all around.
But I’m afraid it’s too little too late.
Wallstreet is going down.
Unlike the unemployment rate.

Businesses are quickly dying.
Former billionaires are now all crying.
Now they’re all just hobos.
Just hobos. Just hobos. Just hobos.



White Christmas
Spoiler:
I’m dreamin’ of a White Christmas
Just like the ones I used to know
With the Niggers pickin’
And the Foremen whippin’
Whenever they picked too slow.

I’m dreamin’ of a White Christmas
Where coloured people have no rights.
With every lawn with crosses, burnin’ bright
May all your Christmases be White.

I’m dreamin’ of a White Christmas
Just like the ones I used to know
With the Niggers pickin’
And the Foremen whippin’
Whenever they picked too slow.

I’m dreamin’ of a White Christmas
Where coloured people have no rights.
With every lawn with crosses, burnin’ bright
May all your Christmases be White.


Silent Night
Spoiler:
Silent knife, sliding right
Out of view, out of sight
Bleed yon wretched mother and kids
No one will ever know what I did
Sleep in torturous pain
Sleep in torturous pain
Silent night, holy night
Not complete without a fight
In the alleys where cops dare not go
I cheerfully gut several hoes
Watch their bodies turn cold
Watch their bodies turn cold

Silent night, holy night
Orphanage, I set alight
Bombed local schools and City Hall
Robbed the bank and gassed the Mall
Wonderful anarchy
Wonderful anarchy


NoëL
Spoiler:
In Jail, In Jail, In Jail, In Jail
I’m still waiting for my Bail!

First night in jail, my cellmate did say:
“Thirty lonely years with no one made me gay”
Obviously enough, I did not sleep
Thrusting and pounding, he pushed it in deep.
In Jail, In Jail, In Jail, In Jail
I’m still waiting for my Bail!

First verse, I’m sure, you already are
Must be severely mentally scarred.
But there is no improvement in sight
He raped me again the following night.
In Jail, In Jail, In Jail, In Jail
I’m still waiting for my Bail!

By this time, you can tell, that my arse
Was violated nightly, my face 'gainst the bars
He’d keep going until he was spent
But at the very least I don’t have to pay rent.
In Jail, In Jail, In Jail, In Jail
I’m still waiting for my Bail!

My time is a butt-fucking fest
Not once can I get some decent rest
Sure, the food’s free, and it’s a place to stay
But my anal virginity was the price to pay!
In Jail, In Jail, In Jail, In Jail
I’m still waiting for my Bail!

But hold on, it gets worse, now I’m down on my knees
Sucking his cock is now part of my fee.
Being his bitch, it’s fucking intense
Long have I stopped putting up a defence
In Jail, In Jail, In Jail, In Jail
I’m still waiting for my Bail!

Six years now, since I’ve become a manwhore
Traffic is regular, around my back door.
I don’t care anymore, I welcome every cumshot
Forever shall I stay here, ass-raped †˜till I rot.
In Jail, In Jail, In Jail, In Jail
I don’t give a fuck if I ever get Bail.


Rudolph
Spoiler:
Adolf, the Nazi Leader
Killed tons of Jews in throes
And if you didn’t like it
It’s off to Auschwitz you’ll go

And there was the SS Leader
Heinrich Himmler was his name
Torture and horrific murder
Was his idea of a jolly good game

Then one foggy Christmas Eve
A Warden came to say
"Mein freund, isch so dark tonight-
Vy nacht set dese Kikes alight?"

And so the had a merry bonfire
Just like a Nazi Jamboree.
Adolf, the Nazi Leader
He'll go down in history.

Adolf, the Nazi Leader
He'll go down in his-to-ryyyyyyy.


Frosty The Snowman
Spoiler:

Frothy, the Blowman
Was a poor pathetic soul
With no dignity and his addiction
Were starting to take their toll

Frothy, the Blowman
Was a fine young man they say
A long time ago, but the people know
How it all started one day

It was about 10 years now
In a dirty dank street downtown
Struck some deals with some shifty types
Then he was snorting cocaine by the pound

Frothy, the Blowman
Was as high as one can be
And the people say, that sometime, someday
He would eventually O.D.

Woohoohoo-hoo-hoo
Woohoohoo-hoo-hoo
Look at Frothy go
Woohoohoo-hoo-hoo
Woohoohoo-hoo-hoo
Flying sky-high with Blow

Frothy, the Blowman
Sniffed one sniff too much one day
Jumped and yelled “Zip-zing! Zoop Yippity-SCHWING!”
And was soon off on his way.

He pranced down to the mall strip
With a stolen machine gun in his hands
Mall Rat, Mall cop, he killed both alike
Murderous antics of a madman

Then came the SWAT team
And they hauled Frothy away
He just laughed and cried,
“This Hell ain’t Good-Bye, I’ll be back again someday”.

Woohoohoo-hoo-hoo
Woohoohoo-hoo-hoo
Look at Frothy go
Woohoohoo-hoo-hoo
Woohoohoo-hoo-hoo
Flying sky-high with Blow.


All Ye Faithful (Not Finished Yet)
Spoiler:

Oh come, all ye children
Into my Big White Van
Oh come ye, all ye kiddies
Ignore the bulge in my pants

Oh come into my basement
I have for you a present
No need to tell your parents
Once you’re within my doors.

Now that you’re all inside
Wouldn’t you take a nice rest?
Oh trust me, you’ll need plenty
Now that you’re my slav- uh- guests.

Would you like a Lollipop
Oh no, it seems it has dropped
Can you bend down, pick it up
Just get down on the floor.


Joy to the World
Spoiler:

Destroy the World, let Hellfire come
And let it burn everything (Down to the ground)
Get ready for Eternal Doom
†˜Cause World War 3 is coming soon
With Air Raids and Mass Bombings
With Air Raids and Mass Bombings
With Air Raids, and Air Raids, and Mass Bombings

Destroy the World, let terror reign
And whole armies deploy (Like toy soldiers)
With tanks and ships, rockets and planes
And when the Troops get killed and maimed
Draft every girl and boy
Draft every girl and boy
Draft every, draft every, girl and boy

Panic like there’s no tomorrow
No shelter to be found (Nowhere to run)
Watch everything you hold dear go
Up in smoke at Ground Zero
As cities crumble to the ground
As cities crumble to the ground
As cities, as cities crumble to the ground.

Let’s fire the nukes all over the place
For now the End has come (Oh shit we’re screwed)
All life on Earth will be erased
Poof. Zip. Gone. Without a trace.
And witness Armageddon
And witness Armageddon
And witness, and witness, Armageddon

And witness,
And witness,
Armageddon.


Feel free to suggest others.


10 for creative
10 for funniest
10 for pure epic.
+5 for christmas.

Add those all together and thats how much +reps you should have for this.


I wrote all those in one inspired night. I've always wanted to record it, but I can't music.

I suppose I could acapella the whole thing, but I'd really prefer actual instruments and musicians. A choir for some of them (especially Destroy The World), too.


Okay. Let's put it this way:
One makes the beat
Then everyone willing to participate makes a sound with the beat (be it rape sounds or what, as long as it goes with the beat).
Then share it in one common place and

WALAH

Instant acapella


just sayin'.

[size=5]Aaaaand +1 for those with Christmas-themed avi's.
Yes, Ryssen's too.[/h]
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