Another story of real life by Freaky.

Well... fuck. I live in the country. Away from others... somewhat. WHY DOES ENTERTAINMENT HAPPENS OFTEN.

Ok to date i had three people die around my property. Two murders and a dumb ass hitting my tree playing ' let's race to the beer place' at 6:30am on a Saturday. Two break ins while i remodel the house. My neighbor beat a tweeker for being in his stuff. Two kids knocking on my door for weed(they thought i was the weed guy) and two hobo fires 1000 ft away. 300 meters for you foreigners. Now i can add crazy woman on meth screaming and walking on my land shout random shit that include i raped her and cut off her leg.

Ok. Now let's start with 8 am this morning. I wasn't home but this crazy tweeker i was told was on my pouch. Which normal people don't do here when you have a border fence and locked gates. Hench why my neighbor beat the shit out of the guy(known theft and crackhead) earlier in my post. My neighbor was outside and saw her so he calmly show her the gate to get out. So i get a call from him so i left where i was and came home to check if the cunt broke in because my dogs and less my shit. Nothing missing and noting broke.

Skip to 2 hours ago. I went to check my mail and i hear yelling and screaming... some ugly chick who was rode hard and put away wet. Meh not that usual... happens every so often. I start to go back to my warm, dry house when this crazy chick starts going off. Meh i walk of my steps and pet the cat. Then she screams 'Officer, officer this is the guy who raped me and cut off my leg'. Well shit. Bare in mind you they're only me and her within hmm 2000 ft. So i stood there and with a puzzle face 'who me?' After about 60 fucks and niggers with in about 3 mins i say well fuck it im gonna get my gun encase she goes psycho. By the time i got my knife instead my neighbor is driving in. He drives in his place and walks to my side of the gate with a pocket .40 in hand... well in the holster on his waist. Later a good 5mins of sitting on my porch just watching her go thru the line of random weird rambling her crazy meth mouth mind is coming up with she yells some imaginary person she talking to on here hand phone(im not even joking... Make a phone with your hand... yep) yells and point to my neighbor that he raped her and took her money. Which we just laugh at, but well she started kicking my fence and threatening to cut me up... so i just called the county to pick her up since it's raining like the biblical flood and i need to get something to eat.

Long story short the sheriffs and ambulance came and i got some tacos. 1pm to about 20 mins ago. Half that time was the cops to show up.

what a wonderful christmas freaky.

o_o

That sucks, man.

god bless freaky hours

Great story, I live in a place where people are so lazy and piggish they can't even throw a tiny bag of garbage into the bin


To this day there's still a big pot laying next to the waste bin.

This one time, I took a big shit in a wal-mart bathroom, and forgot to flush, and some guy went in right after me and gave me a dirty look, to which I replied with a sincere "sorry". The point of that story is, I made eye contact with a random stranger who saw my poo. I found it more funny than awkward, although I never intended for that situation to happen, but the guy was waiting, so I was in a bit of a rush to finish the paperwork and get out.

Sound like a day at arbys.

Why didn't you call the cops earlier?

Because I don't own the street. If I call the police every time someone was chilling on the street longer than 10 minutes then I'll be calling them basically twice a day. The school bus stop is right there. People stand there to get the little shits.

So, when's the movie version coming out? Hopefully it has good subtitles.

A couple of shootouts last month.
A kid or 2 died.
An ex-buddy of mine was talking about how he robs pimps and hookers. Dunno if he's still alive.
An old mexican dish guy got beat up while cleaning the bathrooms by a junkie
Police shut down my neighborhood and the ones after on a manhunt, we had to park outside in the grass.

I had a similar experience on a coach. Only I had a sudden case of diarrhoea. I think dodgy chicken was to blame. Got woken up that morning with the feeling of daggers in my gut at 5am, and throughout the day they got progressively worse and more frequent. Then my body's sudden overwhelming attempts to expel the contents of my bowels on the coach. It was one of those cases where a large turd comes out first followed by a stream of butt-lava. Normally wouldn't be such a bad thing but coach toilets have tiny holes so I blocked it with this enormous turd I produced. End result looked like a brown castle surrounded by a moat.

Toilet had no soap and it ran out of bog roll, I didn't particularly want to handle turd without a way to clean up after so I had no choice but to leave it. Came out, sat back down (had to change my jeans on the coach because I got shit all over them, thank fuck the coach was empty). 20 minutes later a guy goes in and comes right back out with a large grin on his face. Soon after, a woman goes in and stays in there for 40 minutes. To this day I still don't know what she was doing in there or why it took so long.

Good old tales from uncle freaky.

Nothing interesting really happens here, thankfully. Only interesting things I've heard and seen here are apparently some dude binned his skyline into a post outside a neighbours house, who promptly got a gun and told him to fuck off and not come back if he knows what's good for him. He did so.
Other time was I drove home and found a cop car literally in the arse end of a commodore, with another parked in front, with a lady officer just looking kinda confused or kinda like 'fuck this shit'. But, I'm assuming police chase with unrego'd car, and he tried to bolt down one of the neighbours drives. Chopper sounded like it was out too.
Other than that, get the occasional skid down the hill, or past the house. Nothing really interesting thankfully

GIBE ME ATTEEENTIOON!

Oh no~! Im all the boys here!! HURRY!! SOMEONE SMELL MY DICK QUICK! ITS AN EMERGENCY!

I wear my badge with honor my lady!

actually if people are screaming at the top of their lungs and other shits. that's a disturbance and you can call the cops for that.

Nope. There has to be willful and malicious intent. She wasn't trying to fight me or cause criminal intent. Hence she wasn't arrested anyways. Just put in an ambulance and rode off into the distance. No one will come for a noise complaint here. They only came because i said she was on my property earlier talking to my grill like it was a human(at least that was what my neighbor said) and she kick my fence. Being loud and/or crazy isn't against the law. Only time disturbing the peace can be charge is fighting, loud noise after being ask or told to turn it down(after 10pm weekday or 1am weekend)or trying to cause a conflict or immediate violent reaction. I could of called them 10 mins earlier but no one would of cared or came later than they did. Strange because the office down the block and this county only has two towns but 200 cops.

Fun fact i saw her walk by 2 hours ago.

I see, similar to here I guess. My dad used to get pissed because the neighbors would bang on the walls for no reason. (town house) Or play loud music at all times of the day.

Apparently anywhere else the cops would come even if it's just a noise complaint. But my neighborhood is considered the ghetto/ country (somehow) and the cops here would make up their own bullshit rules so they don't have to come. One being, you have to ask them to turn it down in person AND if you do call, you have to wait out on the street.

So you DO live in a lavatory. :o