Hey everyone let's freestyle rap: The Return

Here we go
Comin' back after all this time
To build another house o' rhyme
Fakku's gone too long
Without a decent place to rap
Instead of a million threads askin'
"Hey bitch tell me how you like to fap."

So time to lock and load
And spit some hot fire
Since the situation is dire
To put up a thread not about blowing my load
Time to sit down and compose
Time to stand up
and stand out
go to the rooftops and shout
to proclaim my domination
taking the crown without litigation

"But KG" you say
Fakku's stagnating these days
The chaps just want forum games
making something different my get a -rep to your name
Well if that's your case feel free to complain
Just please flip the switch and turn on your brain

State your objections in rap form
Lend some entertaining rhymes to your scorn
It's not much of a chore
And if you don't want to complain then to you I emplore
Let's all rap a bit more
Like in the golden days of your
Back before the IB wasn't such a bore
And there weren't so many rep whores.

Hey KG, I know why you gotta hate
lots of threads askin “how do you masturbate”
I agree when you say IBs now just a bore
Seeing all these games are just an eyesore

And what’s up with all these fucking rep queens
And all the idiots here who are probably thirteen
With all of these problems on IB that I’ve seen
How can IB go back to the way it had been?

Well I’m not perfect; I’ve played some games
But I’m still asking “Will IB ever be the same?”

Probably won't be the same.
IB's evolvin'
Around Fakku's new generation it's revolvin'
So educations the answer
to stoppin' the fap thread cancer
I'm gonna take a chance here
and assume you're a little new here

Nothin' wrong with that
So long as ya stay within the rulez ya
can still be part of the Fakkuza
With a head on your shoulders well enough to rhyme
Then join me here and spend a little time
In this lime light o' mine

It's increasingly inevitable
that IB's gonna have shit unequivocal
But this isn't irrepressible
Nor is finding the nuggets of thread gold impossible

Just a little harder nowadays
that santa but everyone in a daze
and ice has put creativity into a haze
But don't glaze over with malaise just yet
It's time to let loose IB's neglected pets
Two big dogs known as Wit and Hilarity
Too bad walking them has become a rarity
But I digress and cut short
Time to get 'em off collar and let them out of their bounds
Sound the alarm Fakkuza rappers are releasing the hounds!

Seems people are scared
of coming in here
I guess I must have underestimated people's need
to share all the details of spilling their seed
Or maybe I'm guilty of greed
Expecting more from my fellow Fakku breed

Might be futile to bring back the funk
Excuse me for mixing it up
Trying something new instead of discussing my spunk
But I don't want to get stuck in that rut
I wanted to start something but

I can't do it alone
Don't have paid lackeys
I'm no Al Capone
More participants are needed for this thread to grow
expand and explode
into solid gold.

What is this thread? I don't even know.
Can't say I really like rap yo.
But hey, I'll give it a go.
This thing is really terrible.

The reason nobody comes here
Is because there is no beer.
Or rather, the noobs are too dumb,
They just want to cum.

When I think about it,
This isn't a rap, dig it?
It's more of a poem....
I just didn't know it.


Lol. I fail. XD

I scanned your post
analyzed and examined
and it contains no fail therein
Shia ya helped out
so there's no reason pout
I'm glad to see some more Fakkuza rappin' despite their doubts

I remember back in the hayday
IB was plain Crazay
with polls and lulz
One giant enjoyable partay
But it seems cum crazy noobs have gone crazy
Or maybe just plain lazy

But maybe you're right they could just be plain dumb
Mental gears spinning and synapses numb
Unevolved, uneducated on the use of their thumbs
for something other than fappin'
bitches need a good slappin'

My ears are bleeding
and i am screaming
guys shut the fuck up
you all sound like ducks
leave rapping to pros
and not yo ordinary joes
go listen to wayne you wont evere be the same
if my names not Zain
and its not!

lil' Wayne? Seriously YA OKAY!
Go ahead and complain
but at lest you stopped by dropped off a rhyme or two
So really the fool is you
Come in here trying to be cruel
and instead throwing down more fuel

Helping to light the fire
and spin the tires
to engage this machine of salvation
To spread rappin love all across the Fakku nation
You sound as if you have a fly in your libation
But I can understand man
People get cranky when there's a burning sensation.

YO I LIKE TO RAP
I JUST TOOK A CRAP
IT WAS RLY GOOD
LIKE WHORES IN THE HOOD
DICK HARD LIKE WOOD
FUCKED HARDER THAN ANYONE ELSE COULD

YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

UNCLE PHIL!!!!
Here comes the prodigal son
The stories just begun
Maybe now we'll start to see some more rappin fun,
Yo Phil, so far how's your Christmas run?
Got your presents bought wrapped and spun

Or do you celebrate something different
And not have to tolerate family bickering
or the wassailing predicament?

Hey, I'm Unsigned. You know what I mean?
I've have an avatar brah, he's shootin' a beam
I like Lawyers and Justice and this Judgment stuff too
So you better watch out, or I might sue you
But I'm chill and relaxed, I don't mean to frighten
If you ask for advice, I might just enlighten

Fakku is the place man, it's got all the right stuff
It's a googleplex better Hillary Duff
Let me tell you brah, there's perverts here
Scared? Frightened? Ain't nothing to fear
Some are kind, some are bad, some of them would like to help
And I'm done dude, now gimme some kelp

Doing things like editing posts.
That's what I do, if I may boast.

Here come the elders
lending us a touch of splendor
Unsigned lending his justice beam
So skilled and chill
His raps are almost obscene
cut polished and clean
cultivated to a mirror sheen

Since you shed some light on yours
Let me explain my avatar soup dejour
Mine is Kefka getting ready to shed the light o' Judgement
To quash dissidant begrudgement.
Sephiroth is loved by good little fanboys and girls across the world
So much it makes me want to hurl
Least the ol' clown actually got some shit done
didn't sit in a cave crying for his mum
or have a million doujins written about his pasty white bum

Guess I was right
No one wants to take a chance inspite
of my repeated efforts
to change IB for the better
we want to discus bad gamer
Seriously shit couldn't get lamer

But I digress
It was intelligent minds I sought to impress
But nowadays it seems even they're in the minority
With the noobs, fools, and fap thread mules in the overwhelming majority
Like some drunken sorority
Everyone's doin' the same
flocking up like bleeting lambs out on the range
Strikes me as strange

I remember times when great threads were a staple
drizzling out the bland like sweet sugary maple
but lately on my sanity things have started to pull
as a sit, think debate and mull
I wish someone would do something cool
cause my glass is still half full

Seven four, five four, what time are you using?
Rap aint like that KG, your be just abusin'
The rhythm man. Oh! Can't you see?
If you wanna talk like that, go make some poetry.

I friggin don't understand your timing or beat
Do it right man, and stomp your feet...
To Four four, homeslice. That is the key
Using triplets and rests, that's what it outta be.

okay okay man, I'm sorry
didn't mean to crash the party
Thanks for the help smarty
I'll try to adjust my timing

Maybe I should invest in a metronome
Encrusted in full sparkling ice and chrome
Your a legal dog maybe pitch me a loan

Ight, ight, man. I'll toss you a bone.