Mother of God....

I just figured out the greatest discovery of a lifetime. Read the first and last sentences of a paragraph and it will come out to be funny like 90% of the time. For example:

"High schools have lockers too no?

Kinda the same thing. Never heard of anyone slip a love confession into one though. I've heard a lot of different things get slipped into lockers, but not any love confessions. Usually just drawings of penises."

(credit to lolercookiez. however your fucking name is spelled, thanks for unknowingly letting me copy this to my post without your knowledge. you are awesome) plagiarism ftw.

Read only the first and last sentences of that. And then give me a Lifetime Achievement Award or something. I have been drinking and this is funny to me.

Oi, you should rest.

insomnia man. i'm just too tired to care.

mother of God, i would love to have a taste of what your drinking right now

It's just Rolling Rock. in large quantities.

Crappy beer rots your brain in large qualities

And good beer doesn't?

good beer make you smarter.

is this a request?

When you are drunk, everything is funny to you 90% of the time.

Fix'd

Rolling Rock is good. at least i wasn't drinking Coors.