Your Chat Up Lines

Do you have some chat up lines that you think are funny or good?

I was talking about these with my friends at college the other day, and her friend said a laughable one;

'Your eyes are just like spanners; Every time I look into them my nuts tigten;'

And here's one I favour but have never used;

'If you were a door I'd be banging you all day'

and...

'If you were my homework I'd be doing you all over my desk'

So what are yours? :p

"Does this smell like chloroform to you?" 8)

"I love that ass of yours."

I DO NOT SAY ANYTHING, I JUST FUCK

"My big dick brings all the girls to the yard. They're like, 'it's bigger than yours.' Damn right, it's bigger than yours. I'll let you hold it, but I have to charge."

LOL

IF WE DON'T HAVE SEX RIGHT NOW THE WORLD WILL EXPLODE!

XD they're all good XD

:p

I have lines prepared for situations. When I worked in HS as a vendor at hockey games, girls would always ask "How much do you want?" I'd reply along the lines of "Sorry, I'm not for sale. I only sell the candy"

Also I might set myself up. I will ask a girl if she likes to go clubbing. Usually the answer will be "Yeah." I'll follow up with "So clubbing what...? Like... baby seals?"

Now that I'm taken though, my pick ups go to waste...

Fukken lol'd.

I second dat!

Think less of me for this if you will, but in HS I would actually write down pick up lines I thought of. I had them memorized for different situation that you might find yourself in - like if someone asked about where you were going to college, what time it is, where is a good place to eat - and I'd memorize what to say in those situations.

I also act cocky, but funny. Think about that scene in Top Gun where Tom Cruise follows that lady into the bathroom. She ask "what the hell do you think you're doing? What? You think we can just have sex on the floor?"

He cooly responsds (and in a funny way) "No. I was think more like we could do it on the counter." I wanted all my lines to be like that.

The only down side is when people call you out - like a friend says "He always uses that line"

lesson 101: Memorize pick up lines for different situations, and don't have friends that will sabatoge your flirting.

"I came"

Favorite thing I heard from someone else:

"Girl you are a Priestess from the Shrine of Fine! Take me to church and preach me the Gosple!"

"Hey Babe. Wanna go back to my place and do some math? Add a bed, subtract our clothes, divide your legs, then multiply."