Respect

I've got conflicting views between friends. [insert tl;dr story here]

I ask FAKKU's opinion:

Should respect be earned? (Through actions and attitude, you respect someone for who they are, because they deserve it.)
OR
Should respect be given? (Respect is given as a courtesy, because everyone should be respected equally no matter who they are.)

When you first meet someone, you should provide them a base level of respect. However, that base level needs to be earned for it to remain, and any additional respect should likewise, be earned.

i respect no one and even myself
you have to earn respect

I respect my teacher and my boss right away. Thats giving them respect. if i meet the president i give him respect because he is the president whether or not i agree with his polices. you give respect to people older and wiser than you.

Respect is earned for sure. I had a heated argument with my grandpa about how respect
is earned not given and his response to me was "I'm old, You give me fucking respect!!"
I kid you not that he said something exactly if not similar to that statement and I
told him thats not how the world works today and it does not matter what your age
is, You get respect by the way you treat people not just because you've been around
longer. He was furious and I asked him why he was having such an attitude and he told
me "I earned this fucking attitude" I was really close to my grandpa and when this
argument ended I had less respect for him because of his arrogance.

Try having that opinion in the military. It always pissed me off when some asshole no better than you got off on being a higher rank and demanding respect because of it. Often times these dicks weren't any better at what they did than you were, or were worse at it. And you can't do anything about because of "good order and discipline". You had to just take their crap and hope to get promoted soon.

Respect is given, not earned.

Only people who think that average stranger is inferior that they are think that respect should be earned. The world is too full of assholes who think than they're better than everyone else and so demand people to "earn" their respect instead of giving respect.

If you think respect should be earned, then ask yourself what have _you_ done earn respect?

Too many people in the world already think like this: "This guy is my boss, but he's a dumb prick!" Sure, right. You're smarter, but you're not the boss. It's absolutely not your fault that your position is inferior.



In their eyes, you haven't "earned" their respect. When people want other people to "earn" respect, they treat them like douchebags. Your superiors treat you like a douchebag becaue you haven't earned their respect. You don't respect them either because in your eyes they haven't done anything to "earn" your respect either.

See how that works?



His arrogance, or both of yours? See, both of you are demanding each other to "earn" their respect, rather than giving each other respect by default.

Why should he respect you? What have YOU done in life that's worth respecting? Don't answer with what your grandfather has done or not done to earn respct, I'm asking why anyone should give YOU any respect. Have you EARNED respect at all?

Different people have different standards of respect and what they'll respect someone for. If they could answer the question, you'd most likely be underwhelmed by the answers and just say, "Ha, as if that's anything worth respecting." The only person that can truly answer those obnoxious questions is the one that has or doesn't have respect for those you quoted. I don't see how you can conclude that since they think respect is earned, they demand anything. In the case of nexus, the grandfather is the douche demanding things, nexus is just the one saying that if he demands respect, he'd have to earn it (since he said they were close, I'd assume the old man already earned it). Maybe they don't give a shit if they didn't earn someone's respect. You know what, that's the answer to all those fucking questions, "I don't give a shit."

Anyway, it's a personal value judgment, there's no use arguing when your arguments are only derived from subjective values that aren't really significant.



You can always pretend like you respect them. Hate them on the inside, and wear a "I dun show you respect" mask on the outside.

I know that the words respectful, courteous and civil are synonyms but you don't have to have one to be the other. I can still be courteous and civil to people I do not respect. Wacky idea, no?

I would much rather earn someone's true respect then be given it, and find I subconsciously attach this value to my relations with other people. It's not about inferiority, or that if I do not actively respect a person they = inferior douchebag. No, everyone is a blank slate, if they happen to do something to earn my respect, then I hold them in higher esteem. If they don't, then *shrug* they are still a person with a blank slate, with endless possibilities ahead of them.

Who am I to be giving or not giving respect? Just another blank slate.

Not to be "disrespectfull", but either you actually believe that shitty statement, or you don't know what true respect is. You don't respect someone because of their social or financial position, because they can be pricks and bastards just as easily as everyone else, in fact more so than others, since power and hierarchy tend to change a person for the worst.

I say, respect is to be earned through thoughts and ideas, and the actions that derive from them. Sure, you can be diplomatic and put on a facade of false respect for your "superiors", but you still curse and wish your boss' death if he is doing the wrong things. Putting that specific example aside, can you really respect a parent who sells drugs to kids, and abuses his own? Doubtfull.

From one person to another person, respect should be given right off the bat. Greater respect should be earned, but their should always be this basic level of respect that begins when two people meet each other, and goes up or down as they converse, interact, and learn about each other.

Respect and courtesy are different, Everyone should be treated courteously. elder, people you meet etc. Respect for authority is another thing and is nothing like having genuine respect for a person. This is the kind of respect that needs to be earned in the same way that trust is earned.

I think maybe a lot of people think they should be respectful when being courteous would be enough.

I've always believed in the famous quote "Respect is demanded. Trust is earned."

Ideally, you should show respect to an individual regardless of who they are and how long you have known them. It's just common courtesy. It is the ability to trust them and have faith in them that takes time and understanding.

I say ideally because we all have our moments and circumstances to the contrary.

Actually this was not about me trying to assert my superiority it was about my grandpa's
way of thinking and to tell you the truth he brought this kind of mind set to work and it
got him fired and now he is most likely going to have to sell his condo because of it.
Which serves him right since I told him you can't treat people like he was treating
me. My way of thinking is that when I meet someone I give them genuine respect, But
if they start talking down to me like I am nothing just because I may not have done as
much in life as them they lose my respect and therefore are assholes.

That's probably the best reply I've heard so far.

Your inability to appreciate Rodney Dangerfield shows lack of intelligence.