What is it that makes people successful?

3) Success.

a- Somehow managing to get a goal, whether it is your planned goal, a third party's, or some random goal in the eyes of witnesses/people.

b- Celebrity amongst a community.

c- A condition to reach another stage or goal.


2) What make people success/fail tend to be a combo of :
- chance/luck (at a heavy rate)
- their own skills (or their lacks)
- the context (time and place are important) and the background


1) Why do I fail ?... Mostly bad luck, or misunderstanding.
Why do I success ?... Because the bad luck has forgotten me.

I actually just finished an introductory college class that focuses on college and life skills. The recurring theme of the class was "What makes success?".

This link should be helpful.

TED Talk: Angela Lee Duckworth on Grit

Essentially, the key to success is not how many "failures" you get, but how many more times you persevere beyond them.

Can someone who fails to survive a plane crash manage to persevere beyond it ?...

Seems a bit brain-washing to me :-/

I think what makes people successful is the drive to do what it takes to succeed, even if some of the things that they have to do are unpleasant or painful. We're a generation of people that is lazy, unmotivated and negative by nature, but we can change our nature. Slowly, but surely, if we build positive, healthy habits as the human race, we may change.

But let's be honest, no matter how many women or men succeed, there will always be those who fall short, in spite of their efforts. Some cases are not for the lack or trying, but for the lack of opportunity, sadly.

In order to be successful you need:

1) Motivation
2) Luck
3) Intelligence
4) Talent
5) Money

Time for me to play the grammar asshat game :D

Technically, since I prefaced the 3 questions with "But I would very much like to know:" this third question was the only one that was right (bar the question mark).

The use of the colon means that the 3 questions need to make grammatical sense following what was before the colon (combining them into one sentence). "I would very much like to know what do you think success is?" does not make sense.

Thus the three questions should have been written as follows...

1)What it is that makes you successful (or a failure).
2)What you think makes others successful (or failures).
3)What you think success is.

But hey, who cares about perfect grammar anymore?
So long as we don't abandon them to the point of not being able to understand each other, it's fine to make mistakes.




I am familiar with TED talks, they are often quite good.

But this one I feel is somewhat too vague to really answer the question.
Mainly because of the lack of a formal definition of "grit".

And as for the idea of the growth mindsets, I've had that jammed down my throat for the last year almost, and, while I seem to be unaffected, it actually seems to be making some others I know even worse.

But such are the vagaries of psychological theories, human minds are simply too diverse for a single technique to work with everyone, and most work for less than 80% (if I remember the statistics correctly).

As you said in your OP, it's different for every person.

One thing that can make or break your ability to succeed is how you deal with your failures and success. The issues I see with this is people either; 1) cannot move on from their failures and wallow in their misery, 2) fail but don't learn from their mistakes and continue in the same rut they've been in or 3) don't acknoweldge their failures at all (blind arrogance).

No one is perfect and there will be failures along with success, but how you view both can affect which ones you recieve more of. I also think the same thing for success, if you only look at those and turn a blind eye to your failures then you cannot better youself in the end.

Personally I make sure to look at my successes and give myself that imaginary pat of the back. I make sure to see what worked and what could be improved. I look at my failure, and I make sure to either let my feelings blow off in private or just not let it get to me (rationalize it). I then look at the situation and try to figure out what went wrong, what can I do differently, are there other alternatives/solutions that could be better.

There are other things that make up success and failure which could include; self confidence, a thick skin, how openly emotional you are, luck, charm and charisma, your knowledge on the subject at hand, your goals and how realistic they are, open mindedness, how other's percieve you (makes a job easier if most people don't hate you), how you deal under pressure.

I know someone who does those first two things.

It's pretty depressing, because as his friend, I try to help him (and he excepts my help), but he just doesn't seem to learn from what I help him with, and he just doesn't seem to have the motivation to put in the work he knows he should. So whenever the next test comes along, he fails, and wallows in self pity, before the whole cycle starts again.

I do want to help him, but I can't just drop everything and force him to work all the time. So as I said, pretty depressing.

(Interpreting "grit" as effort/dedication)

The problem about determination, it is a double edge sword. The harder one tries, the more dedication applied to an effort, the more expectations and willpower is destroyed through failure. The more a person relies on the idea of success, the harder it becomes to accept failure when it happens. And no person is infallible, everyone has a breaking point. To push forward, after loosing the will to try, even more so, with little to no motivation other than yourself, is no where near an easily achievable accomplishment. Those who can, I admire and envy, but I only know of a few successes climbing their way out of such a place.

If you want to make the statement, that some form of effort is necessary for success, I completely agree, but I don't agree with the video. (It doesn't help that the only studies I consider valid are peer reviewed, double blind studies, but off topic.) I greatly disagree with her statements, that despite personal and environmental status, their ability for success was based on grit (effort). She easily ignores, discrimination (based on background and/or appearance), physical/mental capabilities (those limited by health issues), economical affordance (how much money/time they can spend), environmental conditions (both residential and province/location), even educational opportunities (a student can not learn more than a teacher has to offer, from said teacher).

There's even what Fligger stated, which I would have not thought of myself. Failure that results in real world and permanent strikes against your ability to perform, such as an obstructive injuries. For instance, a soldier who looses his leg. As it is now, being a soldier attaches negative stigmas, as well, un-adapts (can't think of another word) people to a non-wartime environment. Many soldiers reach a wall of inability and discrimination when it comes to finding employment. A physical injury, so say, a lost arm or leg, prevents them from being able to hold most common job position. Say, wanting to be a programmer. I'd be surprised to find many businesses willing to hire a programmer who lost his arm "out of compassion and respect". Another stigma that can hold people back permanently are things such as records and incarceration. Which often leave the only opportunities, to be found outside of prison, more work that will lead back into. Even if they reform, the stigma associated with their time will prevent most from consideration out of fear of the risk of a relapse. I'm sure you can a couple of interesting studies on this alone.

To summarize, it seems, most of her work is done in very controlled, test based, environments. I admit, I am going in more skeptical than I should, but I haven't found any evidence to reconsider my skeptical approach above. Ultimately, as the video's description states, this is her theory. One I highly disagree with as is in this video format.

Despite my previous statement, in this topic, and this post, which I assume comes off as a very negative disposition towards success. I do greatly value will power, and understand the detriment imposed by valuing luck over it. The mindset that "it is a matter of effort" does yield vastly more benefits than "it is a matter of luck". But not as a motivational discussion, but as a serious observation and discussion of, all the factors involved in success, I would conclude "grit" is not always "the determining factor", enough so that it should be considered for over simplifying, especially in regards to this video.

Failure is not something that can always be brushed off as "a learning opportunity".

(Side note, I had 2-3 personal examples I considered throwing in, but a friend pointed out how I should try to prevent my discussions from becoming too personal. Though I didn't fully understand what he meant, I only assumed, I'll be leaving self references out for awhile.)

• Being at the right place at the right time

• Being a WASP

• Having Connections or Power

• Ambition and Motivation

• Good Education

@ Shotty Too Hotty

In short : luck, luck, luck... and the willing to do.

Well making connections and good education isn't necessarily all luck but if that's how you think then so be it.

I would tell your friend, he can't say he failed if he, himself, hasn't actually failed. Dedicating half the effort to an attempt is dedicating half his ability. If he fails, it is not his whole ability, but half of his ability, that fell short. If half of his self takes a test, that half failed while the other wasn't present. As such, he hasn't failed in ability if he hasn't bother to apply himself fully in the first place, he just failed in effort.

And now that effort is the center subject. Assuming without any just reason to be, he is giving up because he expects to fail, which results in failure, which sets his expectations of failure even higher. It's a circle jerk of self destruction.

Really, I would just say, "you can't complain and pity yourself, if you haven't actually tried. Complain about a failed test after putting your all into succeeding, then failing, then trying again. (3 strikes as it is.) If nothing changes, then tell those around you that something is wrong, and make it known that there is something more preventing you from being able to keep up with the curriculum. As is, your lack of effort in trying to change things, to improve your standings and situation, is the thing holding you back the most. You're your own worst enemy right now".

Depending on how much he complains, I may add this "...and invoking me to pity you for it is unfair. I can't change you. I can only help you, but my help is pointless if you have no intent of really accepting it." Or something along these lines, I could think of crueler words, but going off the idea that this would be a friend I'd want to keep around, this is around what I'd say.

The trouble is he knows that it is his lack of effort that is the main reason he is failing. He wants to put in the effort, because he feels, at the very least, he can improve if he works. And so he doesn't give up, he sticks with the course hoping he'll manage to put in the effort. But he doesn't. He just can't find the motivation to put the effort in. And it's not that he refuses help, it's just that no matter how much people help him, he just doesn't seem to commit the lessons to memory.

Then I would say he should get checked for depression or other chemical imbalances. Anti depressants may greatly help change his mindset and motivate him if he is having that hard of a time, on his own or with help, in pushing himself.

Their still a lot I don't know, and I've gotten mixed messages from a number of different people, but depression isn't very uncommon. The most common statistic I've received is a 1/10 people (dunno if it's for America, alone, or the rest of the world) can suffer from mild depression. So it's worth looking into.

Hard work and not giving in to assholes.

I think a bit of that 3, everything makes a good attitude :)