mibuchiha Posts
mibuchiha
Fakku Elder
Lol ok.
mibuchiha
Fakku Elder
I'm curious about the juicy details.
mibuchiha
Fakku Elder
So vague.
mibuchiha
Fakku Elder
You havent talked about how you talked your way out.
mibuchiha
Fakku Elder
Dreams and suffering in attaining it.
mibuchiha
Fakku Elder
LUCIA. I BE DESIROUS OF ALL PICS OF THAT GIRL.
mibuchiha
Fakku Elder
Just saw it now but nice.
mibuchiha
Fakku Elder
Oh, it's been a while. Hi Azelle.
mibuchiha
Fakku Elder
Test post.
mibuchiha
Fakku Elder
Putting your desires into action...
...is troublesome stuff.
Yet I'm somehow enjoying it, even while feeling the hassle.
Oh my.
...is troublesome stuff.
Yet I'm somehow enjoying it, even while feeling the hassle.
Oh my.
mibuchiha
Fakku Elder
This blog needs more material.
Found it.
Found it.
mibuchiha
Fakku Elder
Oh, so when you said you finished it you meant the arc, not the whole thing.
Funny how it took you less to write a whole arc compared to me writing a single part.
Don't worry, I don't mind you loving me. One can never collect too many loves.
Funny how it took you less to write a whole arc compared to me writing a single part.
Don't worry, I don't mind you loving me. One can never collect too many loves.
mibuchiha
Fakku Elder
Hey strictly speaking I don't!
mibuchiha
Fakku Elder
good avatar.
mibuchiha
Fakku Elder
Dammit I miss quick reply.
7.
...hmm. This is weird. The first part is obviously the direct continuation of the prologue. But the second is also an obvious direct continuation of the last chapter. The timeline doesn't seem to make sense here. Did Russell really hire Oren in the short span of days (which doesn't make sense as well) or this isn't chronological? There seems to be little hint of branching timelines, if any.
Oh, in the following part it's finally clear that it's indeed branched. Well it's clear that you arranged it that way to withhold information until it's necessary, but it seemed quite weird on first reading. Not a problem to me lol.
Long.
Liked wut.
8.
Missing a period.
Extra the.
his -> was.
9.
Weird phrasing.
Missing the, methinks.
One arc ends, begins the other. This is interesting. Post more.
7.
This did little to change his position though and he was beginning to run low on the supplies he grabbed. He called himself a fool for letting such a thing concern him. Why should he fight death’s claws any longer?
---
They left armed and armored the day following the attack on Stonemaw Mine. Two Sentinels, their retainers, the heir to the Cytinin Mercenaries and Officer Andrew Gaines of the Arabi Royal Army with a hundred and fifty men behind him, leaving nothing more than a token force at Frozen Shield.
---
They left armed and armored the day following the attack on Stonemaw Mine. Two Sentinels, their retainers, the heir to the Cytinin Mercenaries and Officer Andrew Gaines of the Arabi Royal Army with a hundred and fifty men behind him, leaving nothing more than a token force at Frozen Shield.
...hmm. This is weird. The first part is obviously the direct continuation of the prologue. But the second is also an obvious direct continuation of the last chapter. The timeline doesn't seem to make sense here. Did Russell really hire Oren in the short span of days (which doesn't make sense as well) or this isn't chronological? There seems to be little hint of branching timelines, if any.
If not on his own then when [they] finally reached Russell.
Oh, in the following part it's finally clear that it's indeed branched. Well it's clear that you arranged it that way to withhold information until it's necessary, but it seemed quite weird on first reading. Not a problem to me lol.
There was no way it could all be for naught after more than twenty years of waiting for the right moment to strike.
Long.
Russell Blackwood liked his lips. Traitors got what they deserved. Even if it took twenty years to deliver.
Liked wut.
8.
he was staring down a blunderbuss barrel, the man behind it his brother
Missing a period.
Whoever inhabited that ancient fort above ground had put the it into use.
Extra the.
If what he said his right . . .”
his -> was.
9.
They sat in the council chambers the way had nearly three months ago.
Weird phrasing.
He remembered times when
Missing the, methinks.
One arc ends, begins the other. This is interesting. Post more.
mibuchiha
Fakku Elder
You can in the source material.
The man is a doctor and professor who is a very very very faithful lover.
The woman was one of his patients.
The man is a doctor and professor who is a very very very faithful lover.
The woman was one of his patients.
mibuchiha
Fakku Elder
It's the people that matter.
mibuchiha
Fakku Elder
Well, the only way to know is to tell me what you see.
mibuchiha
Fakku Elder
Nothing wrong with a lot of copies of it.
mibuchiha
Fakku Elder
This is something I must put here.