If you could talk to your 12 year old self

I should warn myself about him too. He was born three years from now. Which reminds me.

Future self: Hey kid.
Past self: You the fuck are you?
Future self: Doesn't matter. Shut the fuck up and listen.
Past self: Ok mister but it 5$ for you to touch it, 10$ for me to touch it, 20$ for a blow jo....
Future self: When did i ever charge for touching myself?
Past self: Huh?
Future self: Never mind. Look in five years from now your gonna meet this blond chick.
Past self: Ok.... do we fuck.
Future self: nigga listen... yes we do.
Past self: SWEET.
Future self: O_o listen.. don't leave the knife.
Past self: What?
Future self: Don't leave the knife at her place... you worry for months about that.
Past self: ... I think i need an adult.
Future self: Remember to lye the bottom of the ditch also.. they found her too quickly.
Past self: Ok mister.. we will see if we can give you some help.
Future self: Also kill this bitch name XXXXX.. you regret it later.
Past self: Ok.... ineedtogonow.
Future self: Also stop rollin homos. You will like the taste too much.
Past self: FUCK YOU FAGGOT.
Future self: I wonder if i can kill you and nothing will change.

DON'T DO IT!

Is what I would say.

I'll be the richest person on earth, I just need an almanac with horse race track records

Let me see....
I would take him under my arm, make him feel at ease... and fuck with hid head until he becomes as psychotic as I was made when my future self came and visited me back when I was 12.

I'd kill him cause killing myself directly is harder to pull off

I'd tell that fat ass to work out and screw a couple more girls while he's at it instead of being a pussy and only
fucking some chick that regrets it after and some chick who blows you offf to be with some douche and realising her mistake....tchhh dumbass.

Invest heavily in realestate

... before 2008 right?

goes without saying

I dont think I would change anything if I could talk to my 12 year old self, but it would certainly be an interesting conversation.