Girls: Your first time? Painful, enjoyable?
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So, my girlfriend finally decided to go through with it, and we had sex, etc etc. Problem was, I don't think she really enjoyed it. She had no experience masturbating before, and even during oral sex/etc, even though she would get very wet, really had no idea what kind of feeling it was. So, long story short, I don't think she liked it that much. She bled, and was in a lot of pain, almost changing her mind halfway through. Even asking her later, what she liked and didn't like, she really had no idea what an orgasm was supposed to feel like.
So, question for the *ladies*: How long did it take you to begin enjoying sex? Is learning to enjoy masturbation/getting used to those kind of feelings a prerequisite, or did anyone go from zero to sixty in one night, and still manage to enjoy it?
Guys, no need to answer, we all enjoyed out first time (a lot like a manga- came three times, including once before I put it in! Huzzah!). Girls, on the other hand..........is it normal to just not like the first time? Or second/third/fourth?
So, question for the *ladies*: How long did it take you to begin enjoying sex? Is learning to enjoy masturbation/getting used to those kind of feelings a prerequisite, or did anyone go from zero to sixty in one night, and still manage to enjoy it?
Guys, no need to answer, we all enjoyed out first time (a lot like a manga- came three times, including once before I put it in! Huzzah!). Girls, on the other hand..........is it normal to just not like the first time? Or second/third/fourth?
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I'm pretty sure going from nowhere to sex is gone be alot different than going from actually knowing what an orgasm feels like to sex.
<.<;;
She was bound to not like it if she's never even masturbated, the first time I did, I described the feeling as weird. So she'd probably describe it as weird and painful, at best. Not saying you should stop, just saying you should've went slower with it.
I am not a girl.
<.<;;
She was bound to not like it if she's never even masturbated, the first time I did, I described the feeling as weird. So she'd probably describe it as weird and painful, at best. Not saying you should stop, just saying you should've went slower with it.
I am not a girl.
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Women don't get off on penetration. Only way to stimulate and make sex actually somewhat enjoyable for women is to stimulate their vaginal area with either your fingers or tongue.
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Flaser
OCD Hentai Collector
GameON wrote...
Women don't get off on penetration. Only way to stimulate and make sex actually somewhat enjoyable for women is to stimulate their vaginal area with either your fingers or tongue.Not necessarily true. I got off my ex-girlfriend through penetration, so it's possible. Though you'll have to experiment and see what gets her going...
...also take it slow and short on the strokes first. That way you'll last long enough to find out.
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GameON wrote...
Women don't get off on penetration. Only way to stimulate and make sex actually somewhat enjoyable for women is to stimulate their vaginal area with either your fingers or tongue.We'd done that several times prior to attempting penetration (with anything, including fingers). As Quadratic pointed out, the best description she could provide of the feeling was "weird" (guess guys and girls do have something in common,eh? the "painful" descriptor only came from actual penetration). We had perhaps two-three hours of foreplay/making out before attempting penetration, including one hour which was basically me stimulating her.
Flaser wrote...
...also take it slow and short on the strokes first. That way you'll last long enough to find out.†˜Twas the proudest night of my life, in that I lasted for upwards of an hour, without a condom, in perhaps the... well, not to go into details, but the upside of virgins is the tightness factor. The downside is the "dead fish" factor, but I think that's a Japanese thing, rather than a virgin thing...
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[color=blue]The first time always hurts, unless the guy has no girth. In that case it's not satisfying.
Didn't help that the guy I had the first time with was going at it really rough. He just ignored me when I asked him to slow down. [/color]
Didn't help that the guy I had the first time with was going at it really rough. He just ignored me when I asked him to slow down. [/color]
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drsteve1970 wrote...
Guys, no need to answer, we all enjoyed out first time.WRONG:
jenslyn wrote...
My first time did not feel very nice.gibbous wrote...
Neither did mine.That means 66.666667% of non-virgin males on fakku disagree with you. Consider your claim falsified.
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THE ECONOMY wrote...
drsteve1970 wrote...
Guys, no need to answer, we all enjoyed out first time.WRONG:
jenslyn wrote...
My first time did not feel very nice.gibbous wrote...
Neither did mine.That means 66.666667% of non-virgin males on fakku disagree with you. Consider your claim falsified.
I think you might be have a flaw somewhere in your assumptions, though I of cause fail at pinpointing where exactly the problem lies.
The V-cards I have revoked hurt the girl, where one literally broke (the entrance muscle tore). So I think my answer (on behalf of girls) will be the same as the previous ones and all future post in this thread: it will hurt and feel uncomfortable for the girl.
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I don't speak from experience, but I believe that it is possible to enjoy it the first time. Presumably its just rare, depending on personality, mood, preperation, hymen thickness/presence, etc. *shrugs*
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jenslyn wrote...
I think you might be have a flaw somewhere in your assumptions, though I of cause fail at pinpointing where exactly the problem lies.Because there is none. An allquantor-qualified logical expression ("all males enjoy their first time") is valid iff it applies to call parts of a set.
If it does not apply to even only one part of the given set (to you), it is automatically invalidated, that is to say, falsified.
Guy in my avatar knows it all.
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THE ECONOMY wrote...
jenslyn wrote...
I think you might be have a flaw somewhere in your assumptions, though I of cause fail at pinpointing where exactly the problem lies.Because there is none. An allquantor-qualified logical expression ("all males enjoy their first time") is valid iff it applies to call parts of a set.
If it does not apply to even only one part of the given set (to you), it is automatically invalidated, that is to say, falsified.
Guy in my avatar knows it all.
I fully agree with your logic, it was the assumptions you base your calculations which I suspect may contain a slight error.
Clearly your avatar is a well informed gentleman.
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THE ECONOMY wrote...
jenslyn wrote...
I think you might be have a flaw somewhere in your assumptions, though I of cause fail at pinpointing where exactly the problem lies.Because there is none. An allquantor-qualified logical expression ("all males enjoy their first time") is valid iff it applies to call parts of a set.
If it does not apply to even only one part of the given set (to you), it is automatically invalidated, that is to say, falsified.
Guy in my avatar knows it all.
True, but you completely missed the point. As someone with formal training in mathematical logic, I am fully aware of how easy it is to prove by contradiction, though I was not attempting to state a true proposition, merely attempting to humorously dissuade males from answering about *their* first times.
Also, as long as we're nitpicking, his statistic about 66.66667% of non-virgin males on fakku not having enjoyed their first times would only be correct in the event that myself and the two people he quoted are the entire population of non-virgin males on fakku.
I suppose my question would better be phrased as follows:
Given that the first time is painful, and not necessarily enjoyable, what is the best way to turn it into an enjoyable activity, and familiarize her with the idea of sexual pleasure as being something to be enjoyed?
While experience, foreplay, oral sex, etc are all great ideas, I was more curious about the experiences of others (either with your girlfriend, or personal experience of females). My goal is to make her enjoy the experience as well, so that she will always come back before, since I feel like less of a dick when then the girl initiates sex.
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drsteve1970 wrote...
Spoiler:
True, but you completely missed the point. As someone with formal training in mathematical logic, I am fully aware of how easy it is to prove by contradiction, though I was not attempting to state a true proposition, merely attempting to humorously dissuade males from answering about *their* first times.
Also, as long as we're nitpicking, his statistic about 66.66667% of non-virgin males on fakku not having enjoyed their first times would only be correct in the event that myself and the two people he quoted are the entire population of non-virgin males on fakku.
Man, way to spoil it.
The error was obvious, with or without an understanding of logic (formal or the "everyday household kind"). While I am unaware if THE ECONOMY has had any training in formal logic, then I have and I am confident that THE ECONOMY has a good grasp on it regardless.
drsteve1970 wrote...
I suppose my question would better be phrased as follows:Given that the first time is painful, and not necessarily enjoyable, what is the best way to turn it into an enjoyable activity, and familiarize her with the idea of sexual pleasure as being something to be enjoyed?
While experience, foreplay, oral sex, etc are all great ideas, I was more curious about the experiences of others (either with your girlfriend, or personal experience of females). My goal is to make her enjoy the experience as well, so that she will always come back before, since I feel like less of a dick when then the girl initiates sex.
In my experience it took awhile before they really physically enjoyed it (not that they did not like it, but they had to get use to the feeling), but especially for girls sex is also a mental activity, so making her feel good about her self and her being with someone she really likes will make the experience good for her. (this is obvious second hand info, since I am male)
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Brittany
Director of Production
My 'first time' took 5 whole attempts at sex. So it took 5 times for me to go over to my ex's house and us to try again and again before he could go all the way inside.
No, I'm not massively tight, and he wasn't massively large.
I think the biggest problem was that I hurt his foreskin. He wasn't circumcised, and due to my muscles being stretched for the first time, my vaginal walls would pull his foreskin back too far where it pulled on it. (My assumption)
It was rather uncomfortable, and kind of awkward too. Though we were both virgins so the awkwardness wasn't very high. If my first partner hadn't been a virgin, I'm sure it wouldn't have taken so long (though how hard is it to stick something in a hole?) had my first partner been experienced.
But to answer the thread starters question:
I don't think masturbating is exactly a prerequisite, but I do believe masturbation will get her more accustomed to what she likes and what feels good for her. I masturbated before losing my virginity, but I never did anything vaginal.
After having that area opened up from sex, and after the break up, my friend took me to a sex toy store to help me 'forget' about him. So I spent more time on 'me' and I learned different things I liked and I knew how to feel for an orgasm coming or how to control my abdominal muscles to help build an orgasm.
Get her a vibrator ;p even if she is shocked and totally embarrassed, she'll use it. Even if she doesn't admit she uses it.
tldr: Sex gets better when the person is more familiar with their likes and dislikes.
No, I'm not massively tight, and he wasn't massively large.
I think the biggest problem was that I hurt his foreskin. He wasn't circumcised, and due to my muscles being stretched for the first time, my vaginal walls would pull his foreskin back too far where it pulled on it. (My assumption)
It was rather uncomfortable, and kind of awkward too. Though we were both virgins so the awkwardness wasn't very high. If my first partner hadn't been a virgin, I'm sure it wouldn't have taken so long (though how hard is it to stick something in a hole?) had my first partner been experienced.
But to answer the thread starters question:
I don't think masturbating is exactly a prerequisite, but I do believe masturbation will get her more accustomed to what she likes and what feels good for her. I masturbated before losing my virginity, but I never did anything vaginal.
After having that area opened up from sex, and after the break up, my friend took me to a sex toy store to help me 'forget' about him. So I spent more time on 'me' and I learned different things I liked and I knew how to feel for an orgasm coming or how to control my abdominal muscles to help build an orgasm.
Get her a vibrator ;p even if she is shocked and totally embarrassed, she'll use it. Even if she doesn't admit she uses it.
tldr: Sex gets better when the person is more familiar with their likes and dislikes.
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Ziggy wrote...
tldr: Sex gets better when the person is more familiar with their likes and dislikes. Thank you for that... I really wasnt planning on reading that whole thing.
Anyway, IM NOT A GIRL; but in my experience girls dont necessarily love it their first time. ESPECIALLY if theyve never even masturbated before. The first time, whether you be male or female, is a pretty major experience, so I would just give her time. But just because the first time wasnt great, that doesnt mean you should stop, you just have to let her get used to it. And that only comes through experience :)
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CreampieHoney wrote...
My first time was a nightmare. I am unable to share further details about it, though.Crazy guro shit?
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Ziggy wrote...
Get her a vibrator ;p even if she is shocked and totally embarrassed, she'll use it. Even if she doesn't admit she uses it.Actually I've done this before, I guess she did use it then? lol
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Quadratic wrote...
CreampieHoney wrote...
My first time was a nightmare. I am unable to share further details about it, though.Crazy guro shit?
As a consolation, I guess I'm glad it was not some guro shit. Only a few people know of this unfortunate incident that happened to me a long while back and I think I'll be putting myself up to being ridiculed by sharing it with you guys. Please be mindful that it'll open up a floodgate of emotions when I do type this down.
I was 15 when I was clobbered with a helmet by my first boyfriend/rapist, then made to submit to have sex. I was a date-rape victim. I'm just glad to get over the whole thing with the support of my family, friends and school back then. Sometimes, I wonder if my life would have been different if that event didn't take place. It affected me in so many ways and it even led to my failed marriage. I think I rather stop here. I have steeled myself from being a self-pitying fool and have made progress in many areas after that. It is my prayer that no girl/woman or boy/man undergo such physical/emotional trauma.
Argentine wrote...
x-gen wrote...
Nobody in their right mind would ridicule that. I won't pity you since you've overcome that. It's just quite infuriating how so many good guys out there can't get a date, while assholes like this get to do this with impunity.This person speaks the truth.Its any wonder how they even get dates in the first place - - ;;.
Guys who cant respect girls shouldn't be allowed to live
EDIT: I thank x-gen and Argentine for your convictions in treating women right.