Myself into

well guys i need some really good help on this one

I've been with this awesome chick who's on her late 20's years old and I'm 19. She's a single mother (5 year old daughter) and well not with the same words but she asked me if I could be her human vibe since I'm her best friend in school and so it's been for 4 months but we've been keeping it a secret. She tells eveeryone that we're just really good friends but recently she's been acting more lovey-dovey in public as as well as mentioning that she loves me very much
and well I'm starting to get really distracted here on school, although I promised myself not to get too clingy on this.

Basicaly this thing its turning on something that I really wanted to avoid (a real relation ship, cus she has a daughter and it's to much responsibility for me plus she's 10 years older than me) so... i have no idea what am I supposed to do D: cus I want us to still be friends and all

i've never had a girlfriend but ive had like 2 sex friends, who i nailed 3 times each, but with her...
well ispend an awful lot of time with her since we go to the same university and classroom so... i think i'm starting to like her but i dont want that

Is she hot?

If yes, have sex with her. Alot.

If no, what the fuck are you doing with her? then it doesn't matter, have sex with her anyway. Just as much.


But wait, do you have feelings for her? If yes, have sex with her. Alot.

If no...

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No, really. Do you have feelings for her? You said you didn't want it to go this way, are you just embarassed about being in that kind of relationship with someone that much older than you?

Isn't he a bit young to be in a relationship with a single mother?

well like i said she's in her late 20's (29) she's pretty hawt and tall, just how i like them, and i'm starting to fell something, i've never had a girlfriend but ive had like 2 sex friends, who i nailed 3 times each, but with her...
well ispend an awful lot of time eith her since we go to the same university and classroom so... yeah i've always been cold in the matter of showing emotions but at the same time im really friendly and a good guy so i don't know what to do

If you think you like her, maybe it's worth just letting things continue to play out to get a better idea if this is what you want.

If you think you don't like her that way and don't want to get pulled into a real relationship, then you should sit down and talk to her about your feelings on the matter and where you want to go with your situation, ask/listen to her feelings on the matter and where she wants to go with the situation and then try to come to some understanding about where you two want to go from here with this. It could get ugly if she really wants a real relationship but there's no way around it if you've decided you don't want a real relationship yourself.

That said, I'm not sure if there's enough evidence here to conclude she's interested in a real relationship. It might be worth just letting things play out a little further before taking action.

COMMUNICATION IS THE BEST!

If you feel that your relationship is giving you alot of pressure and such then talk to her about it. Tell her how much you like her but just want to take things slow and such. Point is, just talk to her about it!

Just explain to her your true feelings rather than troubling yourself with it but the thing is you might lose your good relationship with her if you're going to do that. Well anyway, that thing will not happen if you two have a strong bond of friendship on each other. So if you two had that one then just tell her your true feelings for your sake and her sake. And also take responsibility on whatever decision you shall make. Good Luck.

Thanx man, I honestly don't know much about this things but I'm most certainly that things will stay the same but my doubt always get the worst of me ):
I mean I should be able to break it up since in the begining she said it would be only to ease her needs and that I'm really nyce to her because she's kinda discriminated cus she's the second oldest person in the generation (don't know why that matters to people) but yeah, I tell her how I'm startin to feel
I'm not ashamed nor anything just.... starting to like her in a girlfriend form of way :S

First off, A lot is two words, not one.

Two, try to be a little more serious >_>

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Anyway Tbh, school first, love secondly, as a mature women I am sure she can understand that. Don't just throw it in her face, like, "I can't do this with you anymore."

Just break it down over time, which doesn't mean you have to ignore her either. Continue on what you're doing, continue to go out with her, and little by little let her understand that you do have feelings torwards/for her, but it's just not the right time in your life. I can see you're not cold about this which is why you're asking for advice. Don't just sit her down and say it's over, just let her know over time that you need to concentrate on other things in life like school and such and tell her that it's not that you don't want to but cannot continue this way.

Maybe you should talk to her...serious talk...

Like it has been said before, why don't you simply talk to her? After all, she's 10 years older than you, she's bound to understand the matter and the consequences far better than you do.

Other than this, I have no real advice. Just think over it rationally, both of you.

Remember, love has no boundaries. Just because she´s 10 years older and a single mother doesn´t mean it´s wrong. If you love her and she loves you, why can´t you be happy together?

Think about it. Could you picture her being a vital part of your live? Could you picture her being your wife?

I'm a person with a very strong future sight and well I've pictured her and all but I'm not ready for that kind of thing cus I mean I'm 19 my life has barely started, I've never though of our relation ship beeing wrong nor have I've been cold towards her since, she maybe 29 years old but she acts like she's 18(srlsy) but when the situation requires it she changes back to 29 and so on and well shes's 29 with a very nyce and sweet daughter, I really like her but u have to admit it, she kinda messed up there by getting pregnant.
Also since the start we both stated that we'd avoid this situation wich she mentions that she's starting to like me more but she still wishes to continue.

I'm currently thinking of acting a lil distant and gradually go like that til I see it fit to break it up during a very serious talk (maybe the most serious I've ever had)

So you really don´t want it to continue? Wouldn´t that be a waste? There´s only one of her so if you break up now things will never be the same. Sure, you might be lucky and maybe win her back, but it´s better not to have left each other in the first place.

Imo even though love has no boundaries him just starting life on his own shouldn't take that big of a step. He risk messing the child and the mothers life up. Heres a question. How does the child view you?

Excuse me for butting in, but Haburi-chan, why in the hell are you encouraging him to stay with her? You barely know him, and much less her. Like he says, he's 19 and has a whole life ahead of him, and to now become a stepfather just like that is just... I guess it would be a dreadful thought.
He also says he has dreams about the future, and having him enter such a relationship could drastically handicap him from pursuing his dreams. Try to be a little more considerate.

Also, the "there's only one of her" talk is quite childish really. Love does have boundaries. And ones own life should come before others'.

this is actually totaly true and i use this moto on day 5time dayly basis

i guess i'll have to be the bad guy(?) and brake it up u_u

haburi-chan... Your intention are good and all and u see this from a completely different angle cus your a girl and maybe older than I am but my thought are ecsactly like kuroneko says i'm just starting my life and thats a really huge huge step for me not to mention im in med school a carrer that requires lot of selfsacrifice, limitations and time plus i'm not ready for that u_u

If she loves you like she always says she does, then she'll understand the situation you're in and let you go.

The woman's 29 I am sure she could handle a little serious talk with you. Tell her how you feel straight up. If she cant understand your concerns (maybe not fully, but ya know a general "oh...okay") then consider that maybe she's not a potential gf material. For some reason I have the feeling that she would understand you.

Tell her what you've told us. A kid is a huge responsibility and you are right thinking about it and not taking it lightly. Going steady with her could very well turn your life on its heels. But it might not impact it as harshly as you think. You never know until you try, but sometimes trying could be painful too.

Basically, keep it cool. Be honest and serious with her. Having second thought is fine and there is nothing wrong with sharing them with your partner (gf or sexpal or whatever). You need to have a certain degree of trust here. I would also say follow your intuition but that might sound like gibberish to certain ppl.

Good luck. Talk to her...!

I think you are on the right track, you are too young for this and you have to think of your future first.

You said yourself she has a kid. In my opinion she could be looking for a father figure for her child and to her understanding you are the perfect one. You should talk to her, tell her you can't be there for at the time.


Dont think about it that much buddy or it will be more difficult in the end