Myself into
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mantisprime1250 wrote...
well guys i need some really good help on this oneI've been with this awesome chick who's on her late 20's years old and I'm 19. She's a single mother (5 year old daughter) and well not with the same words but she asked me if I could be her human vibe since I'm her best friend in school and so it's been for 4 months but we've been keeping it a secret. She tells eveeryone that we're just really good friends but recently she's been acting more lovey-dovey in public as as well as mentioning that she loves me very much
and well I'm starting to get really distracted here on school, although I promised myself not to get too clingy on this.
Basicaly this thing its turning on something that I really wanted to avoid (a real relation ship, cus she has a daughter and it's to much responsibility for me plus she's 10 years older than me) so... i have no idea what am I supposed to do D: cus I want us to still be friends and all
i've never had a girlfriend but ive had like 2 sex friends, who i nailed 3 times each, but with her...
well ispend an awful lot of time with her since we go to the same university and classroom so... i think i'm starting to like her but i dont want that
You've spent so much time with her that you're becoming emotionally attatched to her. You need to sit down and think really carefully about what you're going to do next, because if you say something stupid or say something wrong you're gonna completely fuck up the relationship.
if i were you, i'd stay in the relationship, but ask her what she means when she says "I really love you alot" and ask her why she holds onto your arm if all you two are, are sex friends/human vibe.
Truth be known, 5+ aren't that hard to raise, hell it could even be fun.
if you're so concrete about not wanting a long-lasting meaningful relationship with the woman, then you're going to have to come to a compromise.
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Drifter995
Neko//Night
mantisprime1250 wrote...
Drifter995 wrote...
True that... I'd probably just talk to her about it maybe (if I'm not too late here) tell her you are just friends and you don't want anything else out of it, or something like that... May loses fuck buddy, but you'll save yourself a kid and loss of freedomthanx for the advice but it's too late, I have severed all bonds with her
as far as we go, were just distant classmates
Naww :( oh well, that stops you having to take too much responsibility.. I rekon it would have been pretty hard on you if you'd have stayed.
Ah well, Sad to hear she didn't take it too well, but good to hear you aren't pressured to become a step-father :|
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Drifter995 wrote...
mantisprime1250 wrote...
Drifter995 wrote...
True that... I'd probably just talk to her about it maybe (if I'm not too late here) tell her you are just friends and you don't want anything else out of it, or something like that... May loses fuck buddy, but you'll save yourself a kid and loss of freedomthanx for the advice but it's too late, I have severed all bonds with her
as far as we go, were just distant classmates
Naww :( oh well, that stops you having to take too much responsibility.. I rekon it would have been pretty hard on you if you'd have stayed.
Ah well, Sad to hear she didn't take it too well, but good to hear you aren't pressured to become a step-father :|
same here (:
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Takerial
Lovable Teddy Bear
While age isn't much of an issue, you really were pretty young to be getting involved in a situation like that. Doesn't mean that things won't always work out, but you obviously weren't ready to deal with the issues and problems that you will need to deal with in a serious relationship.
People who think that things can remain "casual" in a sex filled relationship are just deceiving themselves. You don't sleep with people you aren't attracted to, and that attraction will always lead to feelings. Maybe not real love or something like that, but feelings that will easily complicate your "casual sex friends" relationship.
The idea that you could have gone back to being just friends is ridiculous. Just friends is only possible if both parties have no romantic attachment or value. So that was a naive situation to get involved in.
Though honestly the girl itself sounds like she is very immature as well. A young mother with a child should not be running around having "sex friends" with guys ten years her juniors. It's highly irresponsible.
A child is not a plaything. If you take on the responsibility as a parent for that child, then you MUST BE A PARENT FIRST. Before all else.
Either way. If you did feel something for her. You should have told her you weren't ready for the full on serious relationship. And try to tone things back. As in no sex and just spending time with each other doing non-sexual things.
Don't get me wrong. Sex is awesome and a great way to explore emotions and love and such. But it also isn't something a lasting relationship can only be built upon. It will only muddle things up and make the people involved act stupid, and is what happened.
Either way, you both seem to have handled things irresponsibly and immaturely which I guess I shouldn't be surprised considering how the entire situation came about.
People who think that things can remain "casual" in a sex filled relationship are just deceiving themselves. You don't sleep with people you aren't attracted to, and that attraction will always lead to feelings. Maybe not real love or something like that, but feelings that will easily complicate your "casual sex friends" relationship.
The idea that you could have gone back to being just friends is ridiculous. Just friends is only possible if both parties have no romantic attachment or value. So that was a naive situation to get involved in.
Though honestly the girl itself sounds like she is very immature as well. A young mother with a child should not be running around having "sex friends" with guys ten years her juniors. It's highly irresponsible.
A child is not a plaything. If you take on the responsibility as a parent for that child, then you MUST BE A PARENT FIRST. Before all else.
Either way. If you did feel something for her. You should have told her you weren't ready for the full on serious relationship. And try to tone things back. As in no sex and just spending time with each other doing non-sexual things.
Don't get me wrong. Sex is awesome and a great way to explore emotions and love and such. But it also isn't something a lasting relationship can only be built upon. It will only muddle things up and make the people involved act stupid, and is what happened.
Either way, you both seem to have handled things irresponsibly and immaturely which I guess I shouldn't be surprised considering how the entire situation came about.
