Newly single. I dont believe what I'm typing!

Lol its been a decade. 10 years I wouldnt say wasted. I learned a damn lot and was loyal and faithful as ever. Only slept with Just my wife. (obviously divorce is coming, but this is mutual) Sucks it didnt work out but Details Im not tryin to get into at the moment.

So should i go outta my way and "bag as many bitches as possible"

Or continue my track record and be the nice guy ?

My poll question of the day or fill in an answer as needed, minus the obvious my focus is clearly My future success for me and my son.

Do what you want.

There isn't a clear answer for that since everyone has a different answer.
Spend time with your kid, embrace the new freedom.

I always spend time with my kid (my son is my number one priority man he is great :) ) and your right i was just trying to open a random topic that would bring in a bunch of random thoughts. Not lookin exactly for "fakkutherapy", just postin a topic for the fun of it. Do these all have to be serious lol? Again as funny as it may sound i have truly never been single and enjoyed it. I was 13.... >.

You just answered your own question about what to do. Don't make me suggest the film Liar Liar to show you how heartbreaking it is to see a son disappointed in his dad.



In this section? Yes. It's not Incoherent Babbling.

Yes of course you should continue to be a nice guy. I don't understand why people think they have to go and bag all these "bitches" after they just got out of a relationship. To me, its gross. I'm not saying you shouldn't go on dates, but at least like the girl.
You should definitely stick to your son being main priority, though, imo.
If another woman comes into your life, then you can fit time in for her too, but make sure you still leave a lot time with your son as well.

"Bagging a bunch of bitches" is certainly not a good example to be setting for your son. You're his number one role model, try not to forget that.
Definitely get back out onto the dating scene if you're ready for it, though. Get to know women you're genuinely interested in and see how it goes from there. Sorry if that's not the best advice, but I definitely think that's the safer route to go. Good luck!

If you're just getting divorced, you need to calm the shit down, man.

Marriage is a huge thing, even for guys, and yes, even an unhappy one.

Give it time. Regroup. Whether you're aware of it or not, you've got some baggage now. Get your life figured out, fall into a groove, do things you want to do for a while, for the love of GOD, make sure your son comes out in tact, divorces really do a number on kids... and when things have been flowing smoothly for a while, consider establishing female friendships again.

"Bagging a bunch of bitches" is for 20-somethings with commitment issues, whose only responsibilities are to themselves and their apartment.

If you even made it to the altar at all, let alone procreated, you're better than that.

Was that chagagnon guy drunk when he wrote that. sheesh what is he talkin about baggin mad bitches? I was honestly jokin about the baggin mad bitches and find it quite entertaining the direct jabs that were takin because i shared i have a son. I am in fact a great father to my son and have a great relationship. Only cause i enjoy the random topics i post on here am i even responding. But i dont really care otherwise see ya around.

Reported because this isn't IB.

If you don't actually want serious replies, either don't fucking post at all or DON'T post in a section devoted to real responses like... I don't know, the LR&R section? I hope this gets moved soon so you stop jumping all over people for actually caring enough to write out a reply.

do what you WANT. take some time off and think what you want to do with the time that you have. only you can really answer this one. no matter what anyway, you being a guy, time is not that important.

Yea this spiraled. Sorry about offending people. I don't know what I was thinking. That is not who I am, just a stupid guy post at a stupid time. Well multiple times. A lot on the mind I'll blame it on? Obviously hurting after a ten year relationship with the only woman I ever been with. Comments like that show how much growth I could still use. Thank you. And again my bad, was not my intention to bring negative energy to the forums.

Are you genuinely explaining your situation, or just backtracking because you got called out?

I mean, it -would- make sense. It's typical to feel enraged as a guy, over divorce.

Sincere. Takin a step back at the douche i made myself with that but eh shit happens. I tried to delete it haha. movin on thx guys.

If you truly want advice, that's not necessary. But if you feel you got enough and would like to move on, PM Tegumi and request that this thread be locked. [Threads can't be deleted by the OPs]

Sounds good, it doesnt need to be locked, their call. I think to an extent its an honest question. When you get out of a relationship what would you tend to do more. Rack up a buncha rebounds or settle down and find another long term relationship. I just got offended because i mentioned i had a kid and every answer was biased towards that pretty much. My fault for saying too much.

There's no possible reason to be offended by it, if you're a good father. Let me put it to you this way; no matter what you do, say, explain, hide, or open up about, dating multiple people creates flux in a child's life. There is absolutely no way to prevent this. If you go on the active rebound, you are unwittingly setting an example of mysogny and flippant indiscretion to your child. No matter how you spin it, explain it, or even hide it... Your child will pick up on this, and it will imprint on them for life.

A lot of people forget this hugely significant part of childhood and grow up, get arrogant and think 'I'll be more secretive, I'll do it different and they won't get messed up'. Wrong. Your child just had their entire universe ripped into two pieces. Having you even slightly distracted [Which, as a 'casually dating bachelor', you absolutely will be, no matter how hard you to prioritize and compartmentalize your life] will demonstrate to your child even more instability. Right now you need to crack down, step away from women as a whole [Sorry man, it's necessary right now.] and focus on creating a feeling of normalcy for yourself and your child. Trust me, 'In the process of divorce' is a huge turn-off for us women.

It's a red flag, it tells us your life is in a state of flux and uncertainty [which it, in all reality, is.] and raises the unsaid question "What are the chances they reconcile?" <-- worst case scenario. Best case? "How often will she see him/them? What role will she play? What role will I play? What if we're casual, should I avoid the kid completely? If we're not, how soon is too soon to try to get close to the kid? How late is too late? Do I invite him to bring his kid on dates? Do I avoid the subject entirely?" Just... trust me. Your life is complicated enough, adding another person, whether temporary or long-term, is a truly awful idea. Not just as a father, but as a man.

Long story short, if I went through a divorce... I would check into therapy immediately, devote myself to my child to the point of nigh vowed celibacy, and hope and pray to God that one day, he sees fit to nudge my real, forever soulmate into my life because I know in my heart that as a mother, I could never find it in me to 'date'. Forget entirely casual sex.

Kid comes first.

Just bash one out to porn whenever you get urges.

What the father does outside of the house I think is still his business. If he brings it home and the child see's it thats something else. Just coz you ahve a child you dont have to stop living, just as what people end up actually doing and its kinda sad I'll admit.

A child will be stable and sane if you give the kid enough time and love and talk to the kid. Its just like saying, you cant go to a club anymore coz itll traumatize the kid or you can never drink again coz he'll be an alcoholic??

And seriously, why must everything that happens after a relationship be labelled as rebound. Like to get back at your ex? I mean really, that is not the case all the time. And if people we're to attach a time frame that you have to wait for it to be not labelled as rebound well wow. Coz wouldnt we all just be rebounds then at first? Unless youre in an all virgin society and...

Not everything that happens after a relationship is classed as a rebound. It's more of a guideline than an actual rule (inb4PiratesOfTheCaribbean) but the general rule of thumb is to wait until you're properly over your previous relationship or you'll end up hurting future potential partners and fucking things up for yourself.