Is bullying really that bad a thing?
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First off I'd like to say that this is not for an essay or something and I do know it's a very sensitive topic since it can lead to serious consequences (even suicide in worst case scenarios). It just came to my mind while I was commuting home from school.
I got bullied pretty much all my life until I got into high school. I was basically only called stupid nicknames and got picked on by having acne way before the others did (and other stuff), but for me it was still verbal harassment. In some rare cases smaller physical contacts happened (like people stealing my rubber and running away with it, making me chase them or them pushing me around, etc.), but luckily I didn't get hurt. As I grew older I got to realize that these kinds of people exist and you can't really do anything about it since they'll only come back if you try to resist, so I started to ignore them. Luckily, they also matured somewhat so the "bullying" decreased to nicknames only.
So, what did I get from all this? I guess it made me somewhat stronger since I learned from them that I should just ignore people who want to provoke/pick a fight with you since you won't get anything from it. I also think it enlarged my view of people who don't exactly make the world a better place by existing.
Now, I do know that I was lucky enough not having to face any serious bullying (like repeatedly getting violently pushed around, etc.), but I still think I can call myself somewhat of a victim. This is why I think bullying is part of going to school and actually can strengthen and teach you something as long as you don't easily give in to them.
Now the question, what do you think of bullying and do you think it really is as serious as some agencies tell it to be?
I got bullied pretty much all my life until I got into high school. I was basically only called stupid nicknames and got picked on by having acne way before the others did (and other stuff), but for me it was still verbal harassment. In some rare cases smaller physical contacts happened (like people stealing my rubber and running away with it, making me chase them or them pushing me around, etc.), but luckily I didn't get hurt. As I grew older I got to realize that these kinds of people exist and you can't really do anything about it since they'll only come back if you try to resist, so I started to ignore them. Luckily, they also matured somewhat so the "bullying" decreased to nicknames only.
So, what did I get from all this? I guess it made me somewhat stronger since I learned from them that I should just ignore people who want to provoke/pick a fight with you since you won't get anything from it. I also think it enlarged my view of people who don't exactly make the world a better place by existing.
Now, I do know that I was lucky enough not having to face any serious bullying (like repeatedly getting violently pushed around, etc.), but I still think I can call myself somewhat of a victim. This is why I think bullying is part of going to school and actually can strengthen and teach you something as long as you don't easily give in to them.
Now the question, what do you think of bullying and do you think it really is as serious as some agencies tell it to be?
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Depends how stable that person is. If he/she has been bullied all her life and has no friends or anything, than yes. It could mentally damage him/her, which could lead into serious depression, with suicide as result.
But bullying is always inappropriate of course. I just fail to see what's so funny about other people's suffering. But a lot of individuals are willing to do so, as long as they look cool in front of their friends.
But bullying is always inappropriate of course. I just fail to see what's so funny about other people's suffering. But a lot of individuals are willing to do so, as long as they look cool in front of their friends.
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There is no excuse for bullying. It doesn't "thicken your skin" it makes you callus, disconnected, withdrawn, etc.
When I was younger (middle school age) I like everybody else had bullies which repeated all the way until I got to sophomore year in high school (in a neighboring county). Though, I had a rather severe case in middle school. One example was in art class in 6th grade I believe. The teacher went into the storage room while we worked on our drawings. One of the bullies stood up, walked over to me and caught me with a right hand knocking me out of my seat. Another example is when I had stepped of the bus and was walking home. A group of kids stopped me after the bus left, surrounded me and began to take turn beating the living piss out of me.
Until 5th grade I was a rather normal kid. I played all kinds of sports with my friends, studied hard, enrolled in martial arts. Then we moved to the state I currently reside in. Went through hell and I withdrew from everything. Stopped taking martial arts lessons despite nearly attaining a black belt. Didn't try to attain friends (since all my attempts ended with me limping back home bruised)
So from my personal experience with bullies, I would have to say bullying is a terrible thing. Sure, one could argue that I stood up for myself when I was being bullied but, that is because I'm a stubborn bastard. Really all it caused me to do was defend myself with violence then withdraw from societal iterations. I had a severe case so maybe this is a bit too personal for me.
Other people who had it as rough or rougher than I did ended up shooting people over it. Kids are killing kids over bullying, there is obviously a problem. That doesn't excuse the actions of anybody but, it clearly shows there is a problem.
When I was younger (middle school age) I like everybody else had bullies which repeated all the way until I got to sophomore year in high school (in a neighboring county). Though, I had a rather severe case in middle school. One example was in art class in 6th grade I believe. The teacher went into the storage room while we worked on our drawings. One of the bullies stood up, walked over to me and caught me with a right hand knocking me out of my seat. Another example is when I had stepped of the bus and was walking home. A group of kids stopped me after the bus left, surrounded me and began to take turn beating the living piss out of me.
Until 5th grade I was a rather normal kid. I played all kinds of sports with my friends, studied hard, enrolled in martial arts. Then we moved to the state I currently reside in. Went through hell and I withdrew from everything. Stopped taking martial arts lessons despite nearly attaining a black belt. Didn't try to attain friends (since all my attempts ended with me limping back home bruised)
So from my personal experience with bullies, I would have to say bullying is a terrible thing. Sure, one could argue that I stood up for myself when I was being bullied but, that is because I'm a stubborn bastard. Really all it caused me to do was defend myself with violence then withdraw from societal iterations. I had a severe case so maybe this is a bit too personal for me.
Other people who had it as rough or rougher than I did ended up shooting people over it. Kids are killing kids over bullying, there is obviously a problem. That doesn't excuse the actions of anybody but, it clearly shows there is a problem.
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Everybody needs to build character. Some say that being bullied helps build character, but one does not have to be bullied in order to be a good, strong person. Similar to how losing a loved one can help make a person stronger and more enlightened, but one does not need to have someone close to them die in order to be strong.
Anyways, as has already been said, there is no excuse whatsoever for bullying, and it is a heinous act that proves that man is not as evolved as we like to think. Sometimes, the actions of a bully don't seem that bad, but what's important is the reasoning behind why the bully does what he/she does. Whether a kid calls another student fat all the time, or whether a kid routinely pulls down another student's pants in front of others, doesn't matter as much as why either one of them behaves in such a way.
Anyways, as has already been said, there is no excuse whatsoever for bullying, and it is a heinous act that proves that man is not as evolved as we like to think. Sometimes, the actions of a bully don't seem that bad, but what's important is the reasoning behind why the bully does what he/she does. Whether a kid calls another student fat all the time, or whether a kid routinely pulls down another student's pants in front of others, doesn't matter as much as why either one of them behaves in such a way.
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ShaggyJebus wrote...
Everybody needs to build character. Some say that being bullied helps build character.As correct as you are in saying that you don't need to be bullied to build character, bullies sure do help bring along your 'character' much faster than you normaly would. Even then, it really depends on the manner of the abuse. For me it was mental, seems like kids these days can fucking smell emotional instability or physical frailty and rip you a new asshole just like that. 5 years of that crap kind of buffs you up against things that are equally unfair or demented in the future, but most never credit their resilience to oppression towards 'those fuckers in 7th grade'
Bullies are bad, hand's down. However, it does build character, despite the fact it goes about it in a very wrong fashion. Still, I give some credit to my maturity and understanding to those fuckers in 7th grade, without which I would probably still be an emotional wreck. Now don't get me wrong, I am not condoning what bullies do to people. But it seems like in this day and age, being bullied (and perservering through it) is the quickest but saddest route towards reaching maturity. As for the suicide thing, that's an extreme result of bullies. Most of the time though, it's only a small contribution to the overall decision to kill yourself. I know I considered it; I had no friends, I was picked on daily, my mom was overbearing and incapable of understanding, and I was failing my classes. Long story made short, you just have to make the decision not to cave to those faggots in middle school (sometimes HS), and hopefully you will be that much stronger for it.
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I've been bullied a lot when i was at school. That was really irritating and frustrating. Then i entered high school and decided to laugh of it instead of being angry at it. And my bullying stopped immediately.
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It Took Me 5 year To Deal with bullies...
So If your not sure how bad...
Well...
I Became a Sadist...
thats all im saying...
So FUCK bullies...
If i See Some Kid Bully the other they better run cus i will Make sure there are a gonna learn how to use chopsticks with their eyes...
So If your not sure how bad...
Well...
I Became a Sadist...
thats all im saying...
So FUCK bullies...
If i See Some Kid Bully the other they better run cus i will Make sure there are a gonna learn how to use chopsticks with their eyes...
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ShaggyJebus wrote...
Everybody needs to build character. Some say that being bullied helps build character.I agree and disagree with this, yes it build character but in a negative way. Bullying can/will cause long term psychological problems, such as inferiority, The "hikkikomori" syndrome and others that problems that hasn't been thought up yet. I believe we've seen some of results on national television with the "Columbine Shooting Incident" and the "Virginia Tech Shooting". Cases like these cannot be taken lightly and will continue on unless we put a stop to this.
Though when you say "Build a character", I can tell you many ways in which a person can build a character. One's parents and friends shall be the 2 most influencintal sources you can find out there. You're parents raised you and how they raise you is character, same goes for your friends.
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No ones Bullied me yet Since My eyes are bit Sharp when ever i look
oh wait maybe i do have When i was in Grade 5 but I Fought him Back but in the end It's a Draw
Because my Teachers Interfere (is that a Good thing or What?)
i didn't get injure or something before he can hit me I kick him in the ribs Without a Second thought i just Continue kicking like an Insane man or Something until the teachers came(if feels like a Became the Bully) but the Teachers Accuse me Good thing there's a What witness His own Brother and 2 2nd year high school and My Cousin so in the end his the one got a Violation ^_^ since he start the Fight
Im not the Type of Person that can be Easily Bullied
i maybe Silent type person but don't ever Disturb me when i Sleeping during the Lunch Break or else Feel the wrath of my Fist
(wait wait it sound like a Bully)
oh wait maybe i do have When i was in Grade 5 but I Fought him Back but in the end It's a Draw
Because my Teachers Interfere (is that a Good thing or What?)
i didn't get injure or something before he can hit me I kick him in the ribs Without a Second thought i just Continue kicking like an Insane man or Something until the teachers came(if feels like a Became the Bully) but the Teachers Accuse me Good thing there's a What witness His own Brother and 2 2nd year high school and My Cousin so in the end his the one got a Violation ^_^ since he start the Fight
Im not the Type of Person that can be Easily Bullied
i maybe Silent type person but don't ever Disturb me when i Sleeping during the Lunch Break or else Feel the wrath of my Fist
(wait wait it sound like a Bully)
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My personal thoughts on this matter are simple. Being bullied does not build character. I've never seen it make a positive impact on a person, full stop. Even "mild", a word I detest to use in this context, bullying can have intensely horrible effects on a person. It can lead to depression, paranoia, the utter destruction of trust, and instill burning hatred. And this isn't counting the other, more direct things that happen, such as injuries, loss of property by theft, and so forth.
Bullying cannot be excused, under any circumstances whatsoever. Not because "they're just kids", not because "they don't mean it", not because the one being picked on needs to "stand up for themselves". It's utterly vile to make another person suffer. There is nothing positive about bullying, at all, and it's not just a bad thing, it's such an utterly horrible thing that words can barely wrap around its twisted, maddening form.
For better or for worse, that is what I think. Hurting other people is wrong.
Bullying cannot be excused, under any circumstances whatsoever. Not because "they're just kids", not because "they don't mean it", not because the one being picked on needs to "stand up for themselves". It's utterly vile to make another person suffer. There is nothing positive about bullying, at all, and it's not just a bad thing, it's such an utterly horrible thing that words can barely wrap around its twisted, maddening form.
For better or for worse, that is what I think. Hurting other people is wrong.
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oneshott wrote...
Long story made short, you just have to make the decision not to cave to those faggots in middle school (sometimes HS), and hopefully you will be that much stronger for it.It's also kind of sad that a successful way of stopping bullying is to use violence yourself. I've heard plenty of cases and I've been in one myself, and it seems like fighting back keeps them from thinking you're an easy target and usually the fuckers lay off of you.
Personally, I took shit from people since junior high up until junior year in High School, when for the first time I had enough and decided to punch a motherfucker. Never got shit from people after that. What "character" building did I get out of it? For one, seeing people get bullied pisses me off, and being the vindictive fuck I am(it's in my damn avatar), I also wouldn't mind returning the favor on some of those who fucked with me, but with more violence of course.
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I thought I'd reply as it seems like an unusual topic.
Coming from someone that's been bullied, I'd say it could have results that can be interpreted as positive.
I got fairly badly bullied in when I was a kid as well as through highschool. I was a fairly easy target as I was very shy and a bit eccentric. This led to being called names, beaten up and having coins and rocks thrown at me. I ended up being scared of anyone my age.
If everyone around you treats you like a piece of shit and theres no one to tell you otherwise, you begin to believe it yourself.
When I was young I never really learnt how to defend myself and because I thought I was worthless I never understood why I should bother defending myself in the first place. Of course, this made the whole situation worse. I ended up convincing myself that I deserved it.
Towards the end of highschool and in college, there was no more physical bullying as everyone was more mature etc. Also took up thai kickboxing to try and gain some confidence. I had all this repressed frustration and anger at being worthless, but I couldn't "get revenge" as I was 17 and the people around me were more mature.
I desperately wanted friends but I couldn't make any. I foolishly interpreted anyone that had good intentions or was trying to include me as making fun of me. As a result, I ended up alienating everyone around me because I (wrongly) thought everyone was hostile.
After I couple of years at college, I managed to build up a more or less average degree of confidence.
I sometimes wonder what kind of person I'd be if I had an easier and more normal time growing up. I sometimes hate myself, but I rarely regret who I am. I can safely say that the following personality traits are a result of getting bullied: cynical, intelligent (arguable), nihilistic (in a Zen sense rather than an Emo sense), knowlegeable, healthy, deviant and insecure. I still consider myself worthless, however I now consider all humans to be equally worthless. Unless you're Batman or Jesus or something. I still have a great deal of trouble trying to make friends and having conversations with people - even on the internet.
Coming from someone that's been bullied, I'd say it could have results that can be interpreted as positive.
I got fairly badly bullied in when I was a kid as well as through highschool. I was a fairly easy target as I was very shy and a bit eccentric. This led to being called names, beaten up and having coins and rocks thrown at me. I ended up being scared of anyone my age.
If everyone around you treats you like a piece of shit and theres no one to tell you otherwise, you begin to believe it yourself.
When I was young I never really learnt how to defend myself and because I thought I was worthless I never understood why I should bother defending myself in the first place. Of course, this made the whole situation worse. I ended up convincing myself that I deserved it.
Towards the end of highschool and in college, there was no more physical bullying as everyone was more mature etc. Also took up thai kickboxing to try and gain some confidence. I had all this repressed frustration and anger at being worthless, but I couldn't "get revenge" as I was 17 and the people around me were more mature.
I desperately wanted friends but I couldn't make any. I foolishly interpreted anyone that had good intentions or was trying to include me as making fun of me. As a result, I ended up alienating everyone around me because I (wrongly) thought everyone was hostile.
After I couple of years at college, I managed to build up a more or less average degree of confidence.
I sometimes wonder what kind of person I'd be if I had an easier and more normal time growing up. I sometimes hate myself, but I rarely regret who I am. I can safely say that the following personality traits are a result of getting bullied: cynical, intelligent (arguable), nihilistic (in a Zen sense rather than an Emo sense), knowlegeable, healthy, deviant and insecure. I still consider myself worthless, however I now consider all humans to be equally worthless. Unless you're Batman or Jesus or something. I still have a great deal of trouble trying to make friends and having conversations with people - even on the internet.
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Yes. Yes, bullying is a bad thing and it should go burn in a fire.
Now that we've got the impulsive short answer out of a way, let's head for the longer one:
As a person who has been bullied before, I find no positive effects from bullying perhaps maybe that I can relate better to other people who have been bullied oh, wait, no I can't because bullying has made me so introvert and shy I hardly have any people with which I could potentially relate. I've been bullied since before even going to school for the first time.
...now that I think about it, bullying may have had some positive side effects. I'm quite sure it has made me into a more emotional person, which is (as far as I know) regarded as a positive attribute by most, though I can also be very apathetic at times so it sort of cancels each other out.
However, a good and a bad thing is that I know/knew it was really just my behaviour that caused the bullying (sort of), as many people I know who used to bully me say that I have improved considerably and are now among some of my closest friends.
On the depression issue, I have had a short depression when I was in high school and have attempted/considered suicides several times.
Still, bullying can never be excused and if there's one thing it DOESN'T do it's building character. I know of NO person who has ever been bullied who has come out tougher (well, except the people in this thread who said they have).
Thus ends another one of my not really solid posts as most of it was improvised as I was writing and I am too lazy to make it a coherent whole.
Now that we've got the impulsive short answer out of a way, let's head for the longer one:
As a person who has been bullied before, I find no positive effects from bullying perhaps maybe that I can relate better to other people who have been bullied oh, wait, no I can't because bullying has made me so introvert and shy I hardly have any people with which I could potentially relate. I've been bullied since before even going to school for the first time.
...now that I think about it, bullying may have had some positive side effects. I'm quite sure it has made me into a more emotional person, which is (as far as I know) regarded as a positive attribute by most, though I can also be very apathetic at times so it sort of cancels each other out.
However, a good and a bad thing is that I know/knew it was really just my behaviour that caused the bullying (sort of), as many people I know who used to bully me say that I have improved considerably and are now among some of my closest friends.
On the depression issue, I have had a short depression when I was in high school and have attempted/considered suicides several times.
Still, bullying can never be excused and if there's one thing it DOESN'T do it's building character. I know of NO person who has ever been bullied who has come out tougher (well, except the people in this thread who said they have).
Thus ends another one of my not really solid posts as most of it was improvised as I was writing and I am too lazy to make it a coherent whole.
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Firstly it is dependant on the person and thier individual experiences, I can only relate my opinons based upon my experiences which i shall now proceed with.
It could be said that I was fortunate as from the age of about 8 years old my parents decided to put me into a private school. It was when I was 11 that I entered into Trent College a private school with a good reputation. Yet in various forms I still experienced bullying. From leaves to liquids on my head on the bus, Paintballing in the back from my 'team', A laughably unimaginative array of verbal abuse and even being run into a tree after a failed attempt by his mate to push me over him and down the hill (instead I just kneed him in the back :p) I experienced a lot. Yet on the rugby field I was known as a tackler without fear (for you yanks rugby is like american football for men) and alongside a personally forgotten incident where I apparently punched one of them in the face I was to be honest too smart for their feeble efforts to harm me in anyway physically or mentally. You see I found being the 'freak' had its advantages.
And if it helps here is how I see fear. Fear makes you panic and freeze up right? Yet logically is it not better to be fully in control to deal with a problem rather then be paralysed with fear, is that what it takes to be fearless? Who knows, either way bullying can be bad, but only if you let stupid people influence you more then those you admire.
It could be said that I was fortunate as from the age of about 8 years old my parents decided to put me into a private school. It was when I was 11 that I entered into Trent College a private school with a good reputation. Yet in various forms I still experienced bullying. From leaves to liquids on my head on the bus, Paintballing in the back from my 'team', A laughably unimaginative array of verbal abuse and even being run into a tree after a failed attempt by his mate to push me over him and down the hill (instead I just kneed him in the back :p) I experienced a lot. Yet on the rugby field I was known as a tackler without fear (for you yanks rugby is like american football for men) and alongside a personally forgotten incident where I apparently punched one of them in the face I was to be honest too smart for their feeble efforts to harm me in anyway physically or mentally. You see I found being the 'freak' had its advantages.
And if it helps here is how I see fear. Fear makes you panic and freeze up right? Yet logically is it not better to be fully in control to deal with a problem rather then be paralysed with fear, is that what it takes to be fearless? Who knows, either way bullying can be bad, but only if you let stupid people influence you more then those you admire.
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Rbz wrote...
oneshott wrote...
Long story made short, you just have to make the decision not to cave to those faggots in middle school (sometimes HS), and hopefully you will be that much stronger for it.It's also kind of sad that a successful way of stopping bullying is to use violence yourself. I've heard plenty of cases and I've been in one myself, and it seems like fighting back keeps them from thinking you're an easy target and usually the fuckers lay off of you.
Personally, I took shit from people since junior high up until junior year in High School, when for the first time I had enough and decided to punch a motherfucker. Never got shit from people after that. What "character" building did I get out of it? For one, seeing people get bullied pisses me off, and being the vindictive fuck I am(it's in my damn avatar), I also wouldn't mind returning the favor on some of those who fucked with me, but with more violence of course.
Scary, then you become a troll here ^^.
I defeat bullying by using more creative way of bullying, so far, verbally. It's pretty fun but of course, avoid doing it seriously as observable on tv samples, they make it looks like you're friends joking together. When I was younger, repelling bullies had different approach, some go away when ignored and some go away when you fuck them harder. What I can't fight are very cunning people~
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Gentlepervert wrote...
I defeat bullying by using more creative way of bullying, so far, verbally.You defeat bullying by bullying? Nothing changes then.
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hmm...got bullied during elementary. In elementary, I got them to stop bullying me, was to show them how inferior they were when it came to studying(spelling and math).
I would say bullying is a bad thing. Bullies usually consist of people who are quite above the normal body build like jocks(sorry for stereotyping), or people who have been mistreated too.
I would say bullying is a bad thing. Bullies usually consist of people who are quite above the normal body build like jocks(sorry for stereotyping), or people who have been mistreated too.
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I got bullied during my younger years because I was Asian. When I got into high school, I had made quite a few friends who'd back me up. Friends are probably the best way to deal with bullying and you gotta be lucky enough to get into the right clique.
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There's a trick the mind often likes to play (subconciously, of course) where when something bad happens, the mind tries to find good in it, so as to not feel cheated or harmed. For example, I cannot properly critique a movie that I see in theaters until at least a week after I've seen it because I cannot stomach the idea of paying money to see a bad movie. So, as I walk out of the theater, I think only of the good (again, this is done subconciously), so that I can feel like my money was well-spent.
Seeing the way a lot of you guys have responded, I am wondering if the same thing happens when people are bullied. Do people say that being bullied builds character simply so they do not feel like their pain served no purpose? That sounds cynical, but it does make sense.
Why does everyone think? Are you certain that being bullied helped you, or could it be a trick of your mind, to keep you from feeling self-pity?
Personally, I cannot think of a single good thing that came from me being bullied. (And I was bullied a lot, and not just through middle school. I was bullied for years in elementary school and a little in high school. That's what happens when you're a fat kid.) I do not believe that it helped me become any stronger. All it did was create stress and hostility. It just bummed me out. Now, because we tend to think more of the bad than the good, when I think of my childhood, I do not remember friends and good times; I remember anger, embarrassment, and loathing. If I had not been bullied, I probably would have more good memories. Or at least fewer bad ones.
That's not to say that I am not a good person. I am simply saying that my being a good person did not come from me being bullied. It came from hard work and suffering the troubles of life that we all must face. That is why I said that one does not have to be bullied to have a strong character - we all face hardship, and we all must deal with it. Bullies just make life harder, needlessly.
Seeing the way a lot of you guys have responded, I am wondering if the same thing happens when people are bullied. Do people say that being bullied builds character simply so they do not feel like their pain served no purpose? That sounds cynical, but it does make sense.
Why does everyone think? Are you certain that being bullied helped you, or could it be a trick of your mind, to keep you from feeling self-pity?
Personally, I cannot think of a single good thing that came from me being bullied. (And I was bullied a lot, and not just through middle school. I was bullied for years in elementary school and a little in high school. That's what happens when you're a fat kid.) I do not believe that it helped me become any stronger. All it did was create stress and hostility. It just bummed me out. Now, because we tend to think more of the bad than the good, when I think of my childhood, I do not remember friends and good times; I remember anger, embarrassment, and loathing. If I had not been bullied, I probably would have more good memories. Or at least fewer bad ones.
That's not to say that I am not a good person. I am simply saying that my being a good person did not come from me being bullied. It came from hard work and suffering the troubles of life that we all must face. That is why I said that one does not have to be bullied to have a strong character - we all face hardship, and we all must deal with it. Bullies just make life harder, needlessly.
