Is it true how japanese men in japan treat their wives?
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casiopao wrote...
Well from that stament i see that most of japanese man was a jerk.Well the truth not all as if you guys see from the japanese women after marrying they would just sit and relax their ass on the house trying to clean their house(Not really cleaning if i remember they even have a maid to help them clean their house)Not only that they will control the males money and only give you allowance a month once or a week once.
For those report you read of course not all of those report are correct probably some were make up story as the woman already tired for her husband and ready herself for a new one. And of course the bad case will always make big while the good thing will never be announced rendering only the bad thing to be known.
As many have already stated before, different cultures treat and view marriage and women differently. I'm guessing that you grew up in a Western country, where views on women are much more liberal compared to other nations. Have you tried talking to our husband about what you're feeling? He might be thinking that he's treating you perfectly fine because of just how he was raised. Let him know that you want him to be more romantic and caring.
This also applies to how most of us living in the West might be critical of how other cultures treat women. But this doesn't mean that Western culture truly view women as equal to men.
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Sineã®mine
Soba-Scans Staff
It's hard to say whether it is "true" or not. There are aspects of the truth in it, and yet, at that same time, you want to be very careful not to stereotype.
One thing that should be noted, however, as westerners, is one particular aspect of culture. Thanks to how the language itself works, you are supposed to humble your own stuff to people you respect (謙è²èªž). Language influences culture, and as a result you see lots of couples in Japan that will regularly bad mouth their own spouse to other people every chance they get. You hear lots about "useless" husbands and "worthless" wives.
This stands in stark contrast to our usual way of doing things, namely bragging about every aspect of our life that we can conceivably get away with bragging about, to the point of even lying about how good our lives are to feel better about ourselves. This could be part of the reason why the impression develops. Things seem pretty bad when if you ever ask anyone, all they have to say about their spouse are the worst, most negative things.
That isn't the whole of it, but one aspect.
One thing that should be noted, however, as westerners, is one particular aspect of culture. Thanks to how the language itself works, you are supposed to humble your own stuff to people you respect (謙è²èªž). Language influences culture, and as a result you see lots of couples in Japan that will regularly bad mouth their own spouse to other people every chance they get. You hear lots about "useless" husbands and "worthless" wives.
This stands in stark contrast to our usual way of doing things, namely bragging about every aspect of our life that we can conceivably get away with bragging about, to the point of even lying about how good our lives are to feel better about ourselves. This could be part of the reason why the impression develops. Things seem pretty bad when if you ever ask anyone, all they have to say about their spouse are the worst, most negative things.
That isn't the whole of it, but one aspect.
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Teclo wrote...
OH MANSo I went to Japan a few weeks ago. I went to a Japanese club on my own and was just dancing around to their music when some guy comes over to me. He explains "You have to dance in exactly the same way the DJ dances! Don't dance in your own way!" so I kind of go along with this. Then he says "Look, you can get with Japanese girls. I'll show you how" then just grabs two random Japanese girls and pushes them at me. Me and these two girls put our arms around each other and dance. This sort of shit carries on for a few hours until we're going around and just grabbing random Japanese girls who will then just make out with you. No more than making out, but just randomly kissing seems to be the norm.
Later I say to him "That was kind of weird, you grab an English girl like that and she'll just hit you" and he said "Yeah well Japanese girls are... kinder than western girls?"
That's kind of summed it up for me. In Japan, slut = kind. Non-slut = selfish.
Are you serious? which club was this?! *prepares notepad*
Although, my mrs is Japanese so...i wouldn't plan on doing it too much, but that does sound damned fun to experience....
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Cruz
Dope Stone Lion
OH MAN
So I went to Japan a few weeks ago. I went to a Japanese club on my own and was just dancing around to their music when some guy comes over to me. He explains "You have to dance in exactly the same way the DJ dances! Don't dance in your own way!" so I kind of go along with this. Then he says "Look, you can get with Japanese girls. I'll show you how" then just grabs two random Japanese girls and pushes them at me. Me and these two girls put our arms around each other and dance. This sort of shit carries on for a few hours until we're going around and just grabbing random Japanese girls who will then just make out with you. No more than making out, but just randomly kissing seems to be the norm.
Later I say to him "That was kind of weird, you grab an English girl like that and she'll just hit you" and he said "Yeah well Japanese girls are... kinder than western girls?"
That's kind of summed it up for me. In Japan, slut = kind. Non-slut = selfish.
So I went to Japan a few weeks ago. I went to a Japanese club on my own and was just dancing around to their music when some guy comes over to me. He explains "You have to dance in exactly the same way the DJ dances! Don't dance in your own way!" so I kind of go along with this. Then he says "Look, you can get with Japanese girls. I'll show you how" then just grabs two random Japanese girls and pushes them at me. Me and these two girls put our arms around each other and dance. This sort of shit carries on for a few hours until we're going around and just grabbing random Japanese girls who will then just make out with you. No more than making out, but just randomly kissing seems to be the norm.
Later I say to him "That was kind of weird, you grab an English girl like that and she'll just hit you" and he said "Yeah well Japanese girls are... kinder than western girls?"
That's kind of summed it up for me. In Japan, slut = kind. Non-slut = selfish.
Call me crazy but I think he's not being serious.
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That happend around the world. Deal with it. Be grateful that jap guys draw doujin and VN and vid for us. Nuff said
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Sineã®mine wrote...
It's hard to say whether it is "true" or not. There are aspects of the truth in it, and yet, at that same time, you want to be very careful not to stereotype.One thing that should be noted, however, as westerners, is one particular aspect of culture. Thanks to how the language itself works, you are supposed to humble your own stuff to people you respect (謙è²èªž). Language influences culture, and as a result you see lots of couples in Japan that will regularly bad mouth their own spouse to other people every chance they get. You hear lots about "useless" husbands and "worthless" wives.
This stands in stark contrast to our usual way of doing things, namely bragging about every aspect of our life that we can conceivably get away with bragging about, to the point of even lying about how good our lives are to feel better about ourselves. This could be part of the reason why the impression develops. Things seem pretty bad when if you ever ask anyone, all they have to say about their spouse are the worst, most negative things.
That isn't the whole of it, but one aspect.
I use to really want to visit and possibly live in Japan. I did a bunch of research which actually convinced me against it because of the type of person I am. What I read confirmed this sort of thing. They didn't necessarily believe their spouse was "worthless" or "useless", but it was an act of humility. Their spouse could be amazing, but instead of bragging about it they downplay it. As far as I've read humility is an extremely important aspect of Japanese culture. If this is old or wrong I implore you to point it out.
As a side note something else to keep in mind is "politeness" in one country is different then in another. In Japan it is perfectly fine to slurp your ramen versus in many western cultures where that is impolite. Also in Japan it in not necessarily impolite for a guy to let the door close in front of their date's face because they didn't hold it open. I can't remember the exact reason behind why it isn't impolite...
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Keep in mind, unless you're used to or know how the culture is, norms aren't norms in other places. After traveling about, you get used to it, some other aspects you don't, but that's just how the cultures are. I find it perfectly normal behavior if you consider traditional Asian culture and the expected norms of society for them, since that can apply to the general East Asian culture.
