Awkward/ Embarassing Sex Stories

I'm in the mood for a good laugh.
Anyone got some interesting stories to share?
Doesn't necessarily have to be about the act itself, but just dirty in nature.

Bumped faces during sex...

We were having sex one moment, the next moment we were cringed over in pain...holding our faces.

I was sitting on a chair and my girlfriend was giving me a naked lap dance in the dark. The chair leg snapped and we both fell and her forehead hit my nose and gave me a massive nosebleed. We both couldn't stop laughing about that for the rest of the week.

Had a sexual encounter with a girl who needed to be blindfolded to get off.
Another who ripped a chunk of my back with her nails.
Tube down my pee pee... which i came to like... except she pushed too hard and made me pee blood of a week.
Chick who wanted to be burned while banging... i sliped out the back.
Had sex on a bus, on a plane, on the lawn of a party, out in the woods.

And lastly I was bound and gagged fro her pleasure... freaky don't do submissive.

...Wow, Freak...
You ARE a freak! Or at least you had some freaky encounters... XD

I think at least 3 times while in the middle of having sex with my fiance and repositioning, she has brought her foot crashing into my genitals.

She's very clumsy. It hurts.

Ow D: I got a knee to to nuts when my ex was repositioning and yeah...things where done for the night

D:
Ouch... Funny, but ouch...

In the middle of an extended session, we took a bit of a rest while changing positions and such. we were talking about something(i foget what exactly), but somehow she brings up my mother.

I suffer from Polymorphous perversity, also i have no sexual gratification from normal sex nor have feeling on my penis... Only reason i have sex is for my partner. I enjoy pleasuring more then the physical act of vaginal sex. Also Because of it i have heighten sensations on every part of my body except mr one eye. Blood play is a great thing.

Nice stories, you guys. Definitely made my night better.
And Freaky, I was about to pity your penis, now not so much... Since you can everything else on a heightened level.

I was bored.. bold stuff is true.



The rest is just bullshit.

Oh... This makea me pity your penis slightly less, now im envious.
Though I hears that condition can get pretty annoying, if its what im thinking of, never heard men getting it, always women.

It get annoying to the point that when someone just touches me non sexually with me not knowing it going to happen.. it freaks me out... people just to just randomly poke my sides to get a reaction. And that why i tell people DON'T TOUCH ME. It's not like a orgasm thing.. more of a tantric thing.

I would probably be an asshole and poke you too... Twice.

after sex my mother discovered the condom in my laundry (i was a real messy kid, i lost the dam thing in the laundry pile). long story short, she turns and asks me " is this your seamen in this rubber?!?!". i could not help myself and said "well i sure hope so."

It's not really akward or embarassing, just sort of funny.

once we were both so drunk that who ever was on the bottom would pass out. we fipped six or eight times before we just said skip it and went to sleep.

My first time... I was sweating like a pig cuz it was blazing hot and he wanted to be under some fucking covers and during I ended up pushing him off me ad running to the br to vomit... Then his mother came upstairs to see a naked girl puking in her bathroom and her son naked down the hall...horrible horrible day.

Oh wow, thats hilarious