Funny Masturbating Story
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NEXUS
Since 2010
Gravity cat wrote...
I was very curious about sex from a young age, probably as early as 6.One night, I'd found 70's porn under my dad's mattress. I saw a white ginger-haired, freckly woman with cum from a black man on her stomach. To me at the time, it looked like milk. I dabbed some milk from my bottle on my knob, thinking it would "feel good". It didn't. It felt cold.
You still drank from a bottle at 6?
On Topic: When I first discovered how to jerk my McCurk I thought it mean't playing with yourself so I just fumbled my wang around in my hand in one weird twisty motion like I was stirring a pot.
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Gravity cat
the adequately amused
NEXUS wrote...
Gravity cat wrote...
I was very curious about sex from a young age, probably as early as 6.One night, I'd found 70's porn under my dad's mattress. I saw a white ginger-haired, freckly woman with cum from a black man on her stomach. To me at the time, it looked like milk. I dabbed some milk from my bottle on my knob, thinking it would "feel good". It didn't. It felt cold.
You still drank from a bottle at 6?
On Topic: When I first discovered how to jerk my McCurk I thought it mean't playing with yourself so I just fumbled my wang around in my hand in one weird twisty motion like I was stirring a pot.
It was a rough guess, I have no idea how old I was
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Well, i kinda knew of fapping from 12, but i was abit slowly developed, and so first time i fapped, i was kinda hoping something would spurt out. Nothing did. D:
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First time i fapped was when i was 9... I was searching on Sonic on Google.. saw porn of it, and got a boner, turned it off and jumped in my bed, scared.. and when i felt that it felt good when it rubbed against the bed sheets.. i continued to rub, and then i came.
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i never knew an uncircumcised penis existed until i was like 12 watching some porno, and even then i thought that the penis was weird and had some kind of disease, no one ever told me what circumcision was i learned that at age 17 while reading my balls.
My first time masturbating, the climax felt good but nothing came out, i thought it was something wrong with me, but i told myself that cum maybe only came out if your having sex (i was like 10).
A funny masurbation story is when me and my friend broke into his neighbors house to look for porn, the computer was still working with internet, and sure enough when my friend and i left sure enough there was two loads of cum on the keyboard.
My first time masturbating, the climax felt good but nothing came out, i thought it was something wrong with me, but i told myself that cum maybe only came out if your having sex (i was like 10).
A funny masurbation story is when me and my friend broke into his neighbors house to look for porn, the computer was still working with internet, and sure enough when my friend and i left sure enough there was two loads of cum on the keyboard.
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charles2302 wrote...
A funny masurbation story is when me and my friend broke into his neighbors house to look for porn,
For some reason I found this hilarious, breaking into someones house to look for porn XD
I don't really have any funny stories, I just felt guilty the first time I fapped and for the first year of fapping I still felt guilty and tried to stop XD
Now I've perfected my methods and these days I don't fap as much.
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Kaimax wrote...
My first masturbation.. I didn't know that it can "spurt" so far and high.... lol.. It was all over my PC, my keyboard my desktop... oh the horror...Oh god yes!! I'm not the only one!!
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I first fapped when I was maybe 11 years old when I found some porn, I did what guy did with his cock, which was rubbing it, it felt good and I came, the same day at school, I fapped again in the washroom, when I was done, some guys outside asked about this wierd smell of sour milk and copper, I then realized it was my cum from when I was fapping.
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The internet ruined me. When I was 12 in sixth grade I knew about sex it just didn't really intrest me. One day I was doing a project for school and I typed in google "pictures of girls" not even thinking at all that I would get porn. First link was... you guessed it a porn site. I clicked on it thinking 'it can't be that bad' and after seeing the first line of photos I had a boner. I was freaking out trying to get rid of it and blew my load.I had no idea what the fuck I had just done all I knew was that it felt good and I now had to clean up the mess.
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Well...
The first time was in heat was in my parents room at night.
There is a bed in the closet that we use if someone wants to sleep in the day because it blocks out all light and noise, but I was in it sleeping at night. I've heard about the people around me fapping and fapping in class and whatnot but I didn't really know what it was, I just laughed. When I was in heat... I don't know, it was really itchy, but scratching it hurt, so I rubbed and rubbed until I felt dizzy, then all of a sudden, I exploded. It was dry, though.
BY THE WAY:
This thread made me laugh.
The first time was in heat was in my parents room at night.
There is a bed in the closet that we use if someone wants to sleep in the day because it blocks out all light and noise, but I was in it sleeping at night. I've heard about the people around me fapping and fapping in class and whatnot but I didn't really know what it was, I just laughed. When I was in heat... I don't know, it was really itchy, but scratching it hurt, so I rubbed and rubbed until I felt dizzy, then all of a sudden, I exploded. It was dry, though.
BY THE WAY:
This thread made me laugh.
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While sleeping a heavy pillow when above my groin. I dreamed about being with a girl from Baywatch then when i woke up my groin is sticky with something
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I can't think of a story to go here so I'll do just that. My cousin once walked in on me since I'm Homeless and live in my Grandmother's kitchen. It was late and I was like "What the hell, everyone's sleeping and it's been a while. Let's have some fun."
Needless to say I haven't tried since then. I'm too scared my aunt or god forbid my grandmother will catch me. But when I get my own place. . . When I'm not Homeless. . . Yes. . .
Needless to say I haven't tried since then. I'm too scared my aunt or god forbid my grandmother will catch me. But when I get my own place. . . When I'm not Homeless. . . Yes. . .
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I was pretty young the first time... maybe seven. There I was, lying on my stomach on the floor playin' with mah Gundams, when I got this wiggle, this itch, this groove in my hips, and I just started a-grindin'. And then something Magical happened. I got up, looked myself in the mirror, and was like "WHAT. WAS. THAT." I had no idea about... even sex, at that point. Was years before I discovered porn. After that, though, I used that same fire-starter technique. The other kids wondered why I spent all of recess in the bathroom stall. Good times.
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I think i started to fap after reading an incest manga where a guy faps to his mom and he later has sexy times with her
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I think the first time I ever masturbated was in elementary school when I slid down a pretend fire pole and it felt really good. I didn't know what it was but I didn't question it either, so I did it when nobody was around.
The first time I actually tried it I was in the shower and then used a towel in place of a tissue when I was drying off; pretty lame experience.
Later I tried watching porn on Google and used rough paper towels because I thout actually touching myself would've been gross. Painful, painful times.
The first time I actually tried it I was in the shower and then used a towel in place of a tissue when I was drying off; pretty lame experience.
Later I tried watching porn on Google and used rough paper towels because I thout actually touching myself would've been gross. Painful, painful times.
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Well a month later after I discovered masterbating, I came home from elementry school (I was 13 or 14) and I was jerking it while watching some playboy show on cable. Usually I lock the door and put the tv on low but. Well I thought I locked the door but..well..I didn't. My brother (who's like 9 or 8 at the time) comes in right before I'm entering the last blow and we make eye contact and he then sees the tv where a women is riding this guys dick. SO I get up to cover his head and kick him out and told him to do his homework. I think it's safe to say I scarred my brother. Lol.
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Well for me I had already been experiencing erections for about half a year. I had one of these in the shower. As the story goes I began washing my lower region and noticed a kind of nice feeling. Of course being in middle school I had already heard about it so I gave it a few strokes. At this point however when I began to feel the pressure build I got afraid. I thought I would start bleeding or something if I didn't stop. A few minutes later I couldn't help but start again. This time I braved the pressure and exploded all over my shower. I watched in amazement as the semen came out and for a year or two after that I never fapped again. Then it took me over in a rage.
One other thing. My dad happened to go in the bathroom after me and brought me and my brothers in and asked who left "snot" on the tub faucet. I suspect he actually knew what it was even though I didn't because it did look just like snot.
One other thing. My dad happened to go in the bathroom after me and brought me and my brothers in and asked who left "snot" on the tub faucet. I suspect he actually knew what it was even though I didn't because it did look just like snot.
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I discovered masturbation at like 3 years old I think. That was when I started to remember things. (If you don't get what I mean by that, it just simply means I discovered it really freakin' early.) Anyway the way I would masturbate was by lying down on my stomach, pressing my right fist against the root of my penis, and then moving my legs side to side. I'll admit, it still works.
