Irrational Desires

I don't think that's an irrational desire =) With the right muse, stimulus and catalyst...you can get there pretty quickly.

Mine was similar, it was to find true love and my path in life...

I wanted to do something that I'm passionate about, get paid a lot of money, and help create a better world in the process...and all my life, my parents told me to abandon those hopes. "Doesn't matter what you like, just get good grades, go to a good university, get a stable job and settle down with a nice girl, have kids and etc..."

Just hearing that made me sick to the stomach and angry. I think in the end, it really fuelled me to become unyielding and to get things done, no matter what it takes. At one point, I had a mini-meltdown because everyone seemed to be telling me that I'm delusional. In that moment, I made a ridiculous decision. I just decided that I was going to have what I wanted. I had no idea how I was going to get it...but it was going to happen because that is what I have decided lol. First, I had to move away and block out all the noise.

I wasn't attracting the kind of girls I liked, so I took a look at the 'why'...it was me, I was just unattractive to my kind of girl. I did what it took to get that handled...after 2 years of grinding, I got what it takes.

Next, I examined what it took to get the job I wanted. To get paid a lot of money, I needed to have a valuable skill that can make a a lot of money. I thought about which 'talent' I can develop to get that skill. I loved card games, I was pretty pro at any that I picked up...poker seemed like a great idea, studied it intensely, practiced day and night. I got pretty good, I won often...except when I entered higher stakes, it felt like I was going to have a heart attack. Had to ditch the poker idea and pursue the next one.

I ended up developing this really obscure 'talent', I found out that this was responsible for everything that I'm good at. I started consciously developing it and focusing it on making money. I'm not even close to making the amount that I want...but, I'm getting there.

The one last 'irrational desire' I have is to create better world. I have a detailed plan, but it's irrational at this point because...it's going to take place in the distant future and a lot of things can change.