Your epic battlecry!

Found this little thing on another site so i figured I'd sick it on you guys.

So punch in your username and give it a go!

Mine went something like:

Lo! Who is that, rampaging over the steppes! It is Langying, hands clutching a sharpened screwdriver! And with a vengeful cry, his voice cometh:

"I'm going to pulverize you until you acquire caulrophobia!"

Who is that, skulking out of the desert! It is Albel 'The Wicked', hands clutching two hardened pitas! And with a bloodthirsty howl, his voice cometh:

"I'm going to beat you so thoroughly, your screams will shatter lightbulbs world-wide!!"

Who is that, sprinting over the hotel lobby! It is TehMikuruSlave, hands clutching a bladed baseball bat! He grunts vengefully:

"I'm going to pierce a hole in you the size of God!"

Dude your last line is badass me is jealous

mine is something like

Who is that, sprinting over the steppes! It is Superior, hands clutching a sharpened screwdriver! And with a gutteral roar, his voice cometh:

"I'm seriously going to exfoliate you to the bone!!!"

Running over the desert, clutching a sharpened screwdriver, cometh Yorozuya! And he gives a mighty grunt:

"I'm going to blow a bullet-hole in you the size of God!!!"


Zang! Who is that, running across the mini-mall parking lot! It is Yoro, hands clutching gilded boxing gloves! He grunts thunderously:

"I'm going to pound you into the stuff of nightmares!!"


Hark! Who is that, rampaging along the mini-mall parking lot! It is Ghost, hands clutching a burning branch! And with a bloodthirsty scream, his voice cometh:

"Brace yourself, oh human speck of dust! I destroy all in my path with reckless abandon!!"

Who is that, skulking through the hotel lobby! It is Catfish, hands clutching a reflective halberd! And with a mighty grunt, his voice cometh:

"I'm going to pound you until you turn magenta, and launch you into deep space!"

1)Who is that, stalking amidst the icy wasteland! It is Zeph=3, hands clutching a piece of chainlink fence! She howls ominously:

"Blood and souls for my dark lord! I plunder until my glands are satisfied!!"

2)Running out of the steppes, clutching a thorned whip, cometh Zeph! And she gives a bloodthirsty scream:

"I'm going to contort you past the point of no return, and sever every head in sight!!!"

3)Hark! Who is that, running out of the steppes! It is Zeph! Nyan!, hands clutching a mighty sword! And with a cruel roar, her voice cometh:

"Blood and souls for my dark lord! Man, that's some good coffee!"

XD lol

Lo! Who is that, stalking through the tarmac! It is Jonoe, hands clutching a vorpal blade! And with a cruel scream, his voice cometh:

"I'm going to punch you backwards in time!"



Sprinting on the freeway, wielding a bladed baseball bat, cometh Jonoe! And he gives a spectacular cry:

"I'm going to wrap you in bacon, and throw you on the grill!"

Hark! Who is that, striding across the mini-mall parking lot! It is Kazu, hands clutching a jeweled meat hammer! And with an ominous roar, his voice cometh:

"Vengeance and goo flow from my veins! I shall make bloody music with your nation's populace!"

---

Striding amidst the mini-mall parking lot, carrying a piece of chainlink fence, cometh Illumi! And he gives a spectacular roar:

"I'm going to bruise you for such a long time, you will not be able to see straight!!"

---

Amazing, both occur at a mini-mall parking lot.

Lo! Who is that, rampaging across the wasteland! It is Ethil, hands clutching a mighty sword! And with a vengeful bellow, his voice cometh:

"Blood and souls for my dark lord! I shall fill the world with the stench of death!!"

... why is mine the only one that is more of a Tolkien than a Terry Pratchett?

I got another one

Lo! Who is that, sprinting amidst the mountains! It is Your Mom, Steve, hands clutching a reflective halberd! She bellows homicidally:

"I'm going to pulverize you until your mom feels it in her womb!!"

... That was messed up, seriously

I got another one
Running on the plains, wielding a burning branch, cometh Superior! And he gives a gutteral scream:

"I'm going to punch you so utterly, you will polymorph into a gargoyle!"

Running through the desert, wielding a sharpened screwdriver, cometh Halatoma! And he gives a cruel howl:

"I'm going to pound you until I am off parole!"

1) beyond the horizon a man walking with a large nodachi inscribed with ancient letters and an assault rifle slung in his shoulder... its zeKer going to inferno!
and he shouts in might:

"I am gonna shoot and stab the fuck out of you until we go to hell where im gonna do it to you again for eternity in front of the devil himself!"

here's mine, but hoped for something better. :/
"This one's for you, mom! I bring darkness and mayhem until everything has croaked!!"

Striding over the mountains, swinging a jeweled meat hammer, cometh [Liger0]! And he gives a gutteral scream:

"Blood and souls for my dark lord! I lay waste to the landscape with God on my side!!"

I put in my real name and got this ^. So much more bad-ass than the one I got when I put in my user name, at least in my opinion:

Who is that, prowling over the freeway! It is TheDarkStarAlchemist, hands clutching gilded boxing gloves! And with a low howl, his voice cometh:

"I'm going to clobber you until you smell like barbeque, and throw you out the window!!"

Striding on the mountains, wielding an oversized scalpel, cometh The Jesus! And he gives a low bellow:

"I'm going to fuck you until you can no longer smell pretty things!!!"

Kinda sounds like something I'd say.

Rampaging out of the icy wasteland, cutting down all who dare stand in the way using buzzsaw hand extensions, cometh Oneshott! And he gives a cruel scream:

"I'm going to fuck you so forcibly, you'll age fifty years!!!"

Skulking on the plains, brandishing a studded crowbar, cometh Ian! And he gives a bloodthirsty cry:

"I'm seriously going to fuck you so hard, it will be a new form of crime!!!"

Prowling on the plains, clutching gilded boxing gloves, cometh Yur Momma! And she gives a gutteral howl:

"I'm going to smash you with such wanton cruelty, your momma won't recognize you!"


Running along the mountains, swinging a jeweled meat hammer, cometh Blue Ballz! And he gives a gutteral howl:

"In the name of malice, I tear into the enemy like the world's mightiest bad-ass!!!"


Hark! Who is that, skulking along the battlefield! It is Monkeyskull, hands clutching two battered axes! He bellows mightily:

"WAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!!"