The Jesus Posts

I MISS NEE-CHAN!!!

As I said before, I don't have any desire to destroy the world. I live in the world.

If I did want to, I'd divide by zero.


But seriously, if I did, I'd hire some people to bomb the Masjid Qubbat As-Sakhrah and the Vatican simultaneously.

In all seriousness, whether we respect it or not, there are a lot of people that actually believe this shit. It's very easy to laugh at it, but if you actually take the time to process it, there are lessons to be learned. This is "Serious Discussion" after all. Superficially, it's fucking ridiculous, but there are underlying philosophical, psychological, and social implications that deserve some recognition.

I'm probably late, but welcome back Shredder.

Yeah, and then he hit his head on a coffee table. All that means is that he isn't a cat.

I'll try to break it down by numbers...

8% history
6% religion
22% philosophy
10% getting fucked up
14% "What the fuck am I doing?"
8% food and/or water
12% anime/hentai
8% sex related
11% random trains of thought
... and trace amounts of 15 other elements...

I'm pretty much certain that isn't accurate. My mind is far too complex to analyze.

The truth is, the calendar is Mesoamerican. The Maya may have provided the most sophisticated extensions and refinements of it, but it is believed that the calendar predates them.

You could do some serious damage with it, but I doubt it would be enough to destroy the world. Unless people with access to nukes were playing and someone took the waifu they wanted. I'd be hiding under a desk if that happened.

Yeah, because its true... plus I said it.

I don't want to destroy the world. If I did, where would I live? Mars? Fuck that.

I don't bother setting goals for myself, its just an open invitation for disappointment. Besides, doing something awesome arbitrarily is a lot more gratifying than planning to do something and getting it done.

Fuck all your bullshit explanations... pretzels are magic.

For fuck's sake!!! Are you even paying attention to anything any of the intelligent people have said? The calendar does not end on "that date."

[Insert Raptor Jesus joke here]



To be fair, the guy does have a lot of legitimate theories, if you distance them from the contradictory bullshit. I actually read the entire thing. Obviously the person who wrote it is a self-oppressed, misogynistic elitist who has way too much time on his hands. I especially liked the part where he used the very low resolution videos of the reptilian disguised as a CBS news reporter to prove that the mass-media is controlled by the elite who are controlled by the reptilians who are acting on behalf of Darkness to enforce its desire to control everything that doesn't really exist. Well, that and the fact that the Reptilians used dinosaurs, on multiple occasions, to scare off other alien races that wanted to colonize the Earth in an attempt to carry out some plan that goes against the desires of Darkness, that created this matrix-like reality that even our Reptilian slave masters are a part of.

There is still a bit of uncertainty regarding whether it will be the 14th b'ak'tun or if it will be the beginning of a new cycle. A lot of evidence points to a 14th, but due to the limited reference material to go by, the interpretation is still a subject of debate.

Miscalculations only concern specific dates. Regardless of whether the end of the b'ak'tun is 2012 or 2220, there are still inscriptions referencing dates thousands of years later.

Eternity isn't exactly a matter of great importance, in the sense that its a long fucking time. However, there are inscriptions about October 21, 4772 and other dates beyond December 21, 2012. Logically, people are ignoring something important if they're saying 2012 is the end of the calendar. Its not implausible to think that the world will end at some point, in fact its rational. Its inevitable that the sun will consume Earth, unless its been destroyed already or we don't go completely insane and find a way to move the entire planet to a "safer location."


A lot of shit is gonna happen in 2012, but nothing that could directly lead to the destruction of the planet or the destruction of all life. All it would do, if anything, is create a scenario where something could happen. We've been warned, so all we to do is not destroy the planet or eradicate all life on it.


If there is an end to the Mayan calendar, the evidence hasn't been discovered yet. The fact that there are inscriptions that extend beyond the 13th b'ak'tun means that while the cycle may reset, the calendar continues. While everyone has been so obsessed with Dec. 21, 2012 being the beginning of a new b'ak'tun, they've either downplayed, or completely ignored the beginning of the current one. The date of the beginning of the b'ak'tun we're living in was either the 11th, 12th, or 13th of August, 3114 BCE. I can't be totally sure, but I doubt people woke up and said, "damn, the end of the world was pretty serious, but at least I got a good night's sleep."

People who are using the Mesoamerican long count to rationalize their doomsday theories completely disregard that beyond b'ak'tuns there are piktuns. There's also the issue that those who've done extensive research on the calendar aren't even sure whether the end of this b'ak'tun will reset the cycle or begin a 14th b'ak'tun.



I try to avoid being a dick as much as possible, but what you said is childish and ignorant. I'm not gonna pretend that I know everything about the Mayans, but whether or not they could predict such events in detail, I can say that its highly unlikely that they were caught completely off guard by the collapse of the civilization that they spent centuries developing. That's not even considering the fact that they were living there. Learning a little bit about the Mayans before you start talking out of your ass about them is worth considering, but you should at least use some fucking common sense.


Unless it comes from the mouth of someone who has intimate knowledge of the Mayan calendar that can prove definitive archaeological evidence wrong, its bullshit to me. Hopefully, when people realize that 2220 is wrong too, they'll be able to admit their mistake as easily as they did when they thought the end was 2012. Of course, I'm only talking about some people, because others would much rather wait for the world to end than to admit they made a mistake.



I guess that's good enough for now. While some people are irritated that there is another 2012 discussion, I'm quite relieved. Its not like I've been on enough to actually take part in them and when I do get a chance they're in chaos. It feels good to be able to provide something.

I've got a really good one:

No matter how fucking crazy something sounds, you can learn something from it.

I'd rather lose my legs. There aren't as many awesome inventions for armless people. I've always wanted a Rascal, but I don't have a legitimate excuse for getting one.

Nirvana is beyond those who attempt to escape reality without acceptance.