Corrupt A Wish

Granted, you die and remain in purgatory indefinitely.

I wish I could get a Gardes gunpla.

granted, but the pieces are in glass so before you even get to open the package you drop it on the floor and 100 pieces became 1000

I wish my for my friends' happiness

Your pitiful wish will be granted, but your friend's happiness will grow at the expense of your own. Growing exponentially, they will reach ecstasy while you grovel in the depths of despair. Their happiness will be so profound that they will not even notice your descent as you begin to embrace the dark side! The only way to stop your fall is to intentionally hurt your friend and sever the bonds of your friendship. Either way, the dark side will come to control you utterly!

My wish is for more power! Mwahahahaha!

*Sorry, I had to channel the inner Sith for this one. As an aspiring writer I can't let a good story go without some embellishment.*

granted you become so powerful that you the world neglect you and erase your existence

I wish for artistic skills

[color=#993300] Thou shalt be skilled in the art, of drawing only within a 3X3 px space.

I wish to be granted ability to manipulate the Higgs field

Granted, though i have no idea what the hell that 'Higgs field' is but your ability to manipulate it is beautiful and graceful.

Then it explodes and you with it.

I wish i could save the world!

granted but just before the last second before the world gets saved by you, you get caught in a time paradox and are going to repeat the same day over and over and just before you get to save the world it gets reset.

I wish for more chinese music in the west

[color=#993300]Granted, but it's only Chinese heavy metal! Harharhar...
Honestly wish to be able to make things that come to mind

Granted. Every thing that comes to your mind now becomes a reality... Everything. Though you can think up a harem of 7 maid girls of differing ages, ethnicities, and even species, Good luck with any nightmares or scary thoughts you have. Protip: don't ever think about the grim reaper here for your soul.

Oops.

I wish I could be a humanoid slime girl that while mostly inedible so I can't be outright eaten up like jelly, tastes like grape when you lick me. .

Your brain becomes jelly too so you can't enjoy the fact that you're a tasty monster girl.

I wish for the ability to teleport.

But you can only teleport into bathrooms and your house.

I wish I could be close friends with several seiyuus.

Had to Google what a seiyuu was.

Granted, but they don't speak Japanese anymore. They speak Simlish.(the language your Sims speak in in their video games) Enjoy trying to talk to them using random jibberish based somewhat on real world languages.

I wish I wasn't allergic to cats anymore.

[color=#993300]You're not allergic to cats, but you become allergic to human hair.

I wish to be able to travel to the Philippines

Granted... but you'll be welcomed by bolo machete-wielding Moro people and they'll cut you to death.

I wish i have a healing factor.

Granted, but the pain from your injuries never goes away.

I wish I could travel through time.

Granted but you can't choose the time you will be placed in.
I wish I was very lucky