Most Useless Superpowers?

-sweating alcohol
-ability to grow hair
-talk to the pelicans
-ability to do the people clap the hands
-ability to have a stroke everytime there are some danger signal
-ability to be stuck to everything...

Best power ever

Marksman-has the ability to use guns effectively while not using one.

The ability to sweat of my brain cells.

And there goes my 500th post.

Totally wanna have that power, so long as it's good booze. So...hmmm...

Blood Boy - The power to bleed profusely over minor things.

General Obvious - A hardened, experienced Captain Obvious.

How about a group of 3(?) kids... Maybe brothers(?) called the Penal Battalion!? Or you could have just one dude called the Penal Warden!

They fight crime through the use of BL and various 'bull queer' tactics.


Maybe you could even do a Kuroneko-esque spinoff (Except with more cocks) involving them and their attempts to fight the powers that be and bring 'villains to justice'.

"Suck my fat one... ETC"

Being able to teleport, but the only place you can teleport is the bathroom where you last took a dump.

Being able to fly but only 90 degrees up and down.

OK thought of a winner this time, How about a chick called the "Venus Flytrap" and she uses her super cavernous vagina as a kind of suffocating 'killing tool'. Men simply CANT resist sticking their heads in to get a taste of her sweet nectar! (The only problem is that she has terrible flashbacks about her Father, Brother and Lover all succumbing to the "VENUS FLYTRAP")

Sad ending theme 'Lonely Woman':-

A man they call 'The Chill'. He has the power to make you feel, and I quote, 'kind of cold'. His magnum opus is making one's hands feel cold just before using the restroom. If said person is male, they know that they'll have to touch it to aim but... their hands feel cold. It's totally gonna suck, but they really have to urinate...

Not completely useless, but still pretty pathetic.

Vegetable vision.

be invisible... only when people aren't looking

-has the ability to transform into a pebble
-can levitate 1 millimeter off the ground for 7 seconds
-has the ability to transform his sex organ into a sausage
-has the ability to kill dead people

This power could actually be useful during a zombie attack.

Captain Wharrgarbl- has the ability to wharrgarbl.

Captain normal-have all the powers a normal human has

Already have that as a superhero called Everyman, except the little loophole is that his power depends on what other people's perception of normal is... Actually...

Distortion Man - Power to experience a distorted reality, despite being in a normal one.

Huh...maybe I should do something about that...

Mary Jane - The power to be high all the time without actually having to smoke marijuana.

The power to lose any of your five senses for any duration of time.

Reminds me of Setsuko from SRW Z...

Bullimic Boy - The power to vomit on cue.

Guts - The power to store things in his stomach without them being dissolved by stomach acid, but still feels the pain...

Uiharu-has the ability to keep shit warm