ASK A GIRL

This is the love, romance, and relationship section. As members, you each chose to come into this section, and to this thread that I've created. I ask for respect towards me when I'm offering honest advice, which does benefit people who have genuine questions.

I never said anything about anyone's relations with the opposite sex. The prompt of this thread is to be able to ask a girl a question, when male advice isn't quite sufficient, just due to the sheer knowledge of my gender, and my own honest opinions. I don't need anyone to protect me, and you're more than welcome to disagree with my opinions. But I do ask that while in a thread when I'm answering your questions, that you do respect me. If you show me respect, I will surely show you the same.

If you'd like to offer advice, then you can set up a thread. But I did feel offense towards comments like "who let you out of the kitchen" and other derogatory notions and such. I don't see myself as a femenazi, certainly, but I don't really think all that many girls like to be insulted like that, truthfully.

You did say other girls could pipe in with advice in your first post.

And Dante isn't anybody harmful. If you look at his other posts he's pretty knowledgeable himself.
I think my advice personally was pretty straightforward and useful.

I'm sorry if you took offense, but other people may feel a little offset when they look at your welcome thread of OMG GIRL, and your sig OMG GIRL ON FAKKU. It's attention drawing, and yes you are a minority, but it doesn't always call for positive attention.

You need to get a sense of humor.
Please don't take everything on this site seriously.

I was convinced to join the forums on this site in the first place because of their lack of female members. This thread is for serious advice, and I'm fully capable of joking and fooling around in threads other than this one.


And yes, girls are welcome to assist as they like. They can take any questions directed at them any way they like. But when addressing me, I politely ask that I am to be treated respectfully here.

.........one example is me.......

[size=10]Lol Dante's post was very amusing. It's the type of thing I'd expect on 4chan. I suppose seeing it here was what made it so funny. Lol "A female? I have a question, who let you out of the kitchen and taught you how to use a computer?" Lol that attitude toward woman can be amusing (mainly when it's a joke though and not serious). I doubt he meant harm.

Anywho, I suppose that brings me to my next question.. no... first question. You're a female.. or so I would assume you are. How does it feel being a female on the internet?

How often do guys doubt your gender and assume you're really a guy? This type of thread gave me the idea that maybe you could be a guy. I suppose when females attempt to make it known that they're females (without posting pics of their tattoos or something else to support their gender and prove that they are who they say they are) it's hard to tell if it's really a female you're speaking with.

So yeah, those are my questions. Hopefully you can get back to em. :)[/h]

I had a longer reply, but I feel like we are beating a dead horse here, so I'll just make a few points. First off, stop asking for respect. I was quite nice in my post, I could have said lots of mean things. Respect is something you can't ask for, you will get it when it is deserved (not to say you don't deserve it, only that it will come naturally if you do). Second, I would strongly advise you to find a new signature, because I doubt I am the only guy on here with enough dignity to find it insulting.

I'm sorry for derailing your thread as well. In the interests of being civil, I'd like to help get it started again. Soo, how about the question dante asked? What do you think it is that causes women to put guys in the 'friend zone', as opposed to guys who usually end up there only as the result of a failed advance?

@ Elder: Being a woman on the internet... is about the same as being anyone on the internet? Occasionally I run into problems such as skeevy guys asking for some type of favor (which is quickly refused because that just freaks me out) and I tend to avoid 4chan because I don't really care for most of their jokes. Otherwise, there's really no difference.

I've actually been most doubted about my gender here. I frequent Gaia with most of my online time, where I play almost entirely girl characters, and occasionally opt to play a boy, but it's not often. I've had people question my gender, but it looks like I've received more of that here than anywhere else. I am a girl, but you'll just have to take my word on it. I'd rather not post pictures or give out any of my private information here. If you'd like, spalose can vouch that I'm a girl, since he knows me personally.

@Static: Here's the answer to his question, which I gave earlier. I don't have signatures enabled, so I'm not accustomed to seeing mine pop up however many times, but I'll change it.

Ah, I must have missed that. Thats a little bit more specific though I think. You enjoy those things with your guy friends because you describe yourself as a tomboy, but girls in general tend to be much more interested in forming friendships with guys vs relationships (and most of them aren't tomboys) - as opposed to guys who generally look for a relationship first. Maybe its just a male bias though that makes me see it that way. I think your last point is especially true though. I don't mean this in an offensive way, but I think girls like to tease.

I suppose its not necessarily just girls though, it just seems that way because guys tend to be more sex oriented. Girls have alot more opportunities to sort of string guys along than vice versa.

When I'm interested in a guy, I'll most definitely be a tease. But I tend to establish who I want as a friend and someone I want to check out when I meet them. Very rarely it turns into more for me. My relationships tend to last a long time, and I have a lot of guy friends to begin with.

Lol, well although I value spalose's opinions and words, I don't need 'em. I'll take your word. Beside gender isn't too big a deal anyway but it helps to know it, sometimes. Thanks for the answer. Lol, its too bad Fakku seems to be the place where your gender is questioned most, but don't take it personally. Our community is full of genuine people who mean no harm. :)

It's always so hard to tell sarcasm on the internet. ^^;; I'll figure it out at some point. XD

....they dont believe your a girl......why not post your (nude)pic here with a sign "fakku tsuni"

off topic:


On topic:
So far, ive read a couple of really good advice, and i definitely can learn a thing or two from those ;P Although im not really actively looking for a Girlfriend at the moment (I have much more important things to worry about at the moment), but i believe this worry will start bugging me once my current crisis is over.

Admittedly, i have very few experience with girls other than hanging out with my cousin's sisters most of the time. So do not fear offending me in any way possible =p i take it all in quite nicely.

I found that my major problem with trying to even talk to girls, is my confidence, as I have a low self-esteem in these matters (if its about games, my self-esteem sky-rockets xD). for a very long time, ive been trying to identify my problem with confidence; why am i not confident? I dont believe im horridly ugly (some of my friends tell me i actually look quite good, although my fashion sense sucks >.<), I am fit, I have no real physical problems but my confidence level has always been 0. One of my solutions were that im probably too pessimistic. But knowing myself (i self-reflect ALL the time, so i get a better understanding of myself), I am only pessimistic to get a wider scope of things so i have a back-up plan to fall back to if i fail, which DOES NOT apply to talking to a girl, so pessimism might not be the problem (or the sole problem at the very least.

I've been stumped on this for a long time until recently that I discovered why I havent been confident in talking to girls at all... I cant talk @_@ I just cant talk to girls, or alot of other people for that matter. 1 reason being that im a naturally shy person, but the major reason is that: I cannot hold normal conversations for long... I cant talk about things im not interested in, and things that im interested in are only limited to either: Games, Anime, Manga, Myth and mythical creatures, mysteries of life, philosophy, etc. and yes, I know im a dork/geek/etc xD i wont get offended if it gets pointed out.

My question would be: How do I hold a conversation with people? but that would be off-topic, and its too vague of a question for anyone to answer without referring me to a 5000 page documentary. So I would like to ask this: How do I start, and hold a conversation with a girl?

P.S: Sorry for the long post xD

How about not? XD

As for a way to start a conversation, I have two main choices for me to decide to initiate it.


1) Hobbies and Interests: By showing a girl that you're interested in something that she enjoys doing, that's a topic starter. By talking about something you like, it prompts you to talk. Try to pick something that you're very passionate about that you can find yourself easy to maintain the conversation. If you're looking at a girl who also enjoys games and anime, which you like, try seeing if she likes any games or animes that you like. Ask her about her opinion on them, any characters, or why you like the things you do.

2) Compliment: Showing a girl that she's caught your eye is a major ego-boost. Pick one of her features that really stands out. Keep in mind that her clothing should only be used as a last resort, and choosing anything perverted will only warrant you a slap in the face. Eyes or hair are the best ways to go. Most girls take careful watch of how they present themselves every day (although while I choose not to wear makeup, most girls won't leave the house without it) and showing that it payed off lets her know that you're a boy who has good taste. After you've gotten her attention, try asking about things she does. If she's a student, ask her what her major is, or what kind of job she has. Make sure to keep eye contact, it really lets them know that you're paying attention to what she's saying.

ah i see, thanks for the advice ;p ill keep that in mind. Hopefully ill be more successful in future attempts xD

I'd most probably have to fall back to the 2nd choice though =X girls that are interested in what i am passionately interested in are very rare >.<

Either way, +rep for the help =p thx

I've caught interest in a girl that's also into anime. We've talked about a couple of things like what anime we liked, where we're from, and sometimes somewhat joke around in Japanese class. My question is how do I go on from there?

Ask her if she'd like to go out to eat with you, possibly a movie.