Your Clone: Fight or F@%K?

neko-chan · 2010-10-31T21:54:46-01:00

Here is the set up: Assume you are locked in a room with a perfect clone of your current self. There are no doors, no windows, no cracks. The clone will completely disappear in one hour, and then you will be released from that room by, lets say robots, who will then self-destruct. No one will ever see what you do, no one will ever know what happens, no one on the the outside world will ever even know that you were locked in a room with your clone for an hour. So here is the question... [size=12]Do you fuck or fight yourself? [/h] It is important to note two things: 1.) Those are your only choices 2.) You are the only one who will ever have this opportunity. In every dimension and in all of existence you will be the only one to ever have this dilemma made manifest. NO ONE WILL EVER HAVE THIS CHANCE AGAIN. EVER. Now a lot of people would say "Damn thats extreme - I'd just want to talk to myself." But that is the problem, you're talking to yourself. You can do that right now. This clone is going to be you in every way - your memories, your outlook on life, your opinions, likes and dislikes are going to stay the same. The conversation is going to go nowhere. You're just going to be pleasing yourself by talking to someone who agrees with you in every way. So why not take it a step further? And I know what your thinking: "But we're the same sex! Thats gross and illegal in some parts of the world!" Hey look, NOBODY WILL EVER KNOW. Your clone won't even care. Just accept the fact that you're okay taking it from yourself and your clone will feel the same way because you are the same person. Now is the time to tell if your a good kisser without hearing the usual BS from your romantic partner about how you shouldn't, "worry honey, because everyone kisses differently." Hell, if you've ever been bi curious, now is your chance to experiment with the most intimate partner ever - yourself. It's practically like masturbation but think about this added bonus - your clone will know all your turn ons and exactly how to please you the right way. Plus, all those dirty things you never were never able to try with anyone else are now just one-wink-to-your-clone away. Nothing is off-limits. But maybe you're thinking, "My clone probably does know my biggest turn on: The opposite sex." Fine, then it may be time to beat the shit out of yourself. Imagine, there will never be a better fight anywhere. Ever. This is because the both of you to are equally matched. You know each others weakness and strengths. You have the same endurance, speed, and power. You'll be fighting like goddamn ninjas as you'll easily predict and block each others moves. Don't worry about the cops or any hurt feelings, this is just me fighting with myself to determine who is the one[b]. Plus, you can punch yourself for all the dumbshit you've done that nobody ever knew about but knew you deserved to get roundhouse kicked for. [b]But you wont feel it cause you did it to your clone. [size=10]People Die when they're killed!? Are you fucking shitting me!? [/h] So here is your chance to literally kick yourself for not asking out that person to prom. You can literally kill yourself for the stupid shit you did. At least it is better thank porking yourself right? Or is it? The truth may very well be that your an absolute psychopath, and once the clone version of you realizes he only has one hour to live he may just rip out your goddamn eyeballs and stuff them into your ear holes due to the adrenaline and desperation of their situation. You're going to die anyways so you might as well take down the asshole who got you into this situation in the first place. So you might have a great time sparring... ...or maybe you just got in way over your head. Or maybe, you should of just fucked yourself. It would of been so much easier[/i] [size=10]Pictured: Not how you planned things turning out[/h] [size=14][b]So what's the answer? [/h] That is for you to decide. I noticed that this argument tends to result in a lot of girls saying they'd get it on with themselves (which is hot) while guys can't get over the fact they are dealing with the same sex and thus resort to violence (not as hot but still kinda hot). Then again, if you don't find yourself attractive enough to bump uglies with, why would anyone else? Should you do it just for the sake of confirming that someone somewhere wants your body even if it is only a clone of yourself? If you like, check out the full article at Cracked.com. Then immediately come back here and tell me why you'd totally make-love-to/beat-the-shit-out yourself.

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What do you shout?

ArchDemon_Red

14 years ago

This situation is without a doubt a disadvantage for guys, because unlike a girl-to-girl action which is hands down very hot, a guy-to-guy action isnt.

So as for me I would go for fighting my own self. I have my share of battles in the past but I want to know what it feels like to fight someone not only my equal but also someone who knows my every move. (It would be like naruto fighting with himself when he was trying to control the kyubi.)

TheDarkStarAlchemist Requests Moderator

14 years ago

I'd rape the shit out of that fucker. If he disappears after an hour I'd kill him. Beat the crap out of him and kill him.

chrusti

14 years ago

This was a joy to read. How do you guys come up with these ideas?!
Hehe, I would probably fight myself though.

Machipa

14 years ago

I'd totally do myself. Sounds interesting in a way. ;]

BaconHentai

14 years ago

I'd definitely fight myself... it sounds really exciting

SamRavster

14 years ago

Dammit, why couldn't the clone have been opposite sex? Ah well.

I'll probably get him to do some work for me. I have three essays to write. Get the bastard to do some of it for me. Thank you very much clone. I won't even need to double check it myself, I know it'll be fine XD

But...if that option isn't on the cards, I'll just have a good ol' fight. I'll like to see how hard I actually punch; well I'll like to say I'd knock him out in one punch, but then again I wouldn't as it shows me as a one-punch knockout.

Work, or fight. No sexing it up for me I'm afraid; I'm not that way inclined.

kgods

14 years ago

This is way too fun of a concept. I suppose sexxors might be interesting and they say you should try everything at least once. You could make a funny game out of it; masturbation races, surprise buttsex, etc.

Ahh giving whole new meaning to "go fuck yourself." I'm in.

Aili

14 years ago

Easy choice here, I would go with fucking the clone. So many things to do in the world and it would be nice to try everything once :)

Gquain

14 years ago

LETS FIGHT,
I want to test my outlook in a real battle and i can also find my weakspots.
The hardest enemy is always your true self.

Hentanize rebaS

14 years ago

I'd probably fight and test my combat abilities on someone who's on the same level as I am.

DarkdaemonPK2

14 years ago

I'm a guy, then I'd fight my clone. If you are a girl, then do some lesbian scenes.

-DarkdaemonPK2

Fablir

14 years ago

Alot of you people who choose 'Fight' to improve / test their skills have missed the point that the clone is a PERFECT clone of yourself.
Therefore the clone would have exactly the same mindset / thought pattern as you.
In other words: You are basically fighting a mirror, you can't really test your skills like that.
Unless you ofcourse decide with your clone from which direction you will hit and what (s)he will do next, but that would defeat the point of the fight and just turn it into something like some theatre act that you're practicing for.

Ofcourse this applies on the 'Sex' choice aswell, but explaining how that would be different would take too much time in the state of mind I am in so I'll just skip that for now atleast.

Anyway, *turns on Goodbye Horses*.
"Would you fuck me?" "I'd fuck me... I'd fuck me hard!"
- Jay, Clerks.

DarkdaemonPK2

14 years ago

I hate cloning now.

-DarkdaemonPK2

bbeb91ffddabb06b93a44320c

14 years ago

id probably fight myself! because i like to be unique.

b938e08d78bd451d24af94a45

14 years ago

Of course I would fight myself. I've always wanted to try to beat someone just like me, so it would be quite intense.

That1guy

14 years ago

I have never met an opponent more worthy than myself. Fight to the finish then.

Longevity

14 years ago

2 longevity's i would befriend myself and take over fakku and then the US

neko-chan

14 years ago

Longevity wrote...

2 longevity's i would befriend myself and take over fakku and then the US

Clone disappears in one hour. Also you are locked in the room.

THAT'S OKAY THOUGHT OBVIOUSLY THAT IS ONLY A MINOR PROBLEM.

Longevity

14 years ago

neko-chan wrote...

Longevity wrote...

2 longevity's i would befriend myself and take over fakku and then the US

Clone disappears in one hour. Also you are locked in the room.

THAT'S OKAY THOUGHT OBVIOUSLY THAT IS ONLY A MINOR PROBLEM.

i am a genius we'd get out of the room in 6 seconds and then take jacob hostage for control of the site then we'd have him kill the president but make the president declare us the new world leaders.

neko-chan

14 years ago

I bet you would fuck your clone.

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